


That Darn Cat

by CanterburyTales



Series: Lokitty Chronicles [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cat Loki, F/M, Human everyone else, Iron Man 3 Spoilers, tasertricks - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-20
Updated: 2015-05-28
Packaged: 2018-01-09 10:54:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 53,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1145128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CanterburyTales/pseuds/CanterburyTales
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor persuaded Loki to return to Asgard before the portal was opened and the Chitauri invaded. The Avengers cleaned up and that seemed to be the end of it. Unexpectedly, Thor has returned, he's moved into Stark Tower, and he's brought his pet cat with him. A pet cat named NotLoki.</p><p>Thor was never very good at coming up with names.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Cat comes to the Tower

**Author's Note:**

> AU for half of _Avengers Assemble_ on. 
> 
> Is this fluff? I'm never sure what is fluff and what isn't. It will be pretty silly however, because life is a bit grim at present. 
> 
> For obvious reasons, any romance is going to take a while...
> 
> Inspired by [this art posted by homeiswheretheheartsare](http://homeiswheretheheartsare.tumblr.com/post/69548550691/steve-rogers-he-pooped-in-my-shoes-too) and [Kat Dennings' Instagram pic](http://instagram.com/p/hzcdoOiNP6/).

“It's not that I don't love these talks...” 

“Silence!” Odin's knuckles shone white as he gripped Gungnir ever more tightly. “You abandoned your madness and returned with your brother, and for that I am glad. But every day, every hour before you did brought death and destruction to Midgard!” 

Loki narrowed his eyes. “Perhaps I should not have listened to Thor. Perhaps I should have stayed and achieved my end, to rule the earth as a benevolent God. To rule as you once did, _Father_!” He spat the word at the AllFather's feet, as he stood straight, unguarded and unbound at the foot of the throne.

Odin sighed and ran his hand across his face. On his left Frigga stood, calm at first glance but sorrow in her eyes. Thor stood a few steps behind Loki, and Odin could see that only his newly learned self-control kept him from intervening. Frigga had warned Thor to keep silent, Odin knew. As it was, Thor was the only reason Odin could remain patient. Thor alone had found Loki, reached him, had persuaded him to return to Asgard. Thor had fought for his brother, he would not accept losing him now. 

“We are not gods. We live and die as they do.” Odin held up a finger as Loki made to speak. “We have more in common with them than you acknowledge. Thor learnt what it truly means to be a king on Midgard. How much is sacrifice, not power.”

Loki understood at once. “You want to send me there as once you sent Thor? Very well then, do so! The Citauri will search for me, so best do it at once.” Loki tilted his head, as if considering the option, and his next words were laced with malice. “But you cannot strip me of my magic, it was no gift of yours. You cannot send me in chains, or you might as well condemn me to death here. So send me as I am to these people you care for so much.” His scorn was written clearly on his face. “I know what you truly think of them. Cattle, in the main. At the worst, vermin; at the best, pets!”

Loki stopped as a strange expression dawned on the All-Father's face.

* * *

“Where'd the cat come from?” Steve had come in for coffee, and stayed to watch Clint. Perched on top of the counter, the archer sat motionless, except for the movement of his eyes fixed on the black shadow flitting about the common room. He answered Steve without changing his position one iota.

“Thor.”

Steve took a sip of coffee and reflected. “Huh. Would have seen him more as a dog guy. A hound, you know?”

Clint grunted in reply.

Steve thought back to the little old lady who lived down the block when he was a kid. She had had cats, a whole pack of them. This one could have been one of them, used to being spoiled and petted, and wept over for weeks when they vanished. There was nothing alien about it at all. It was black, green-eyed, with the long-legged grace of a young cat. The animal roamed the room, making occasional small leaps as if testing its skills. 

“Does it have a name?”

“Thor said he’s called Notloki.”

Steve paused, then put down his cup, in case the problem with his ears spread anywhere else. 

“You’re telling me that Thor’s pet cat is called Notloki?”

“Yip.”

Steve's brow crinkled as he considered how to approach the next question. “Did Thor...mention why he called his cat that?” he asked, in as offhanded a manner as he could manage. He knew, almost as well as Phil and Natasha, how Clint had struggled to recover after what Loki had done to him.

The archer shrugged. “A joke, he said.” Hawkeye mumbled something else, and Steve was pretty sure it was, “ha fucking ha.”

* * *

 

“Notloki? Really?” Jane's voice was sceptical as her face. She shook her head at Thor, who stood abashed. 

“I...did not think. It was the first name that occurred to me.” 

Jane smiled. “It's not a name. It's a denial of something no-one would have thought of otherwise. You are such a bad liar.” 

“So Loki always said.” Thor put his arms around her and returned her smile. “Do you think it a failing?” 

Jane tilted her head up for a kiss. “No, I like it.” 

* * *

 

After a week, the cat was part of the furniture. The creature was, Thor said, bound by magic to stay within the building, unless muzzled and carried by Thor himself. The cat slipped about like a shadow, avoiding contact. Steve's tentative approaches were greeted by an arched back and spitting. Remembering the muzzle, Cap decided to steer clear. Clint and Natasha watched the cat when he was near, but never approached or spoke to him. Tony ignored him and Bruce apparently forgot the cat existed ten seconds after each time he saw him. 

Rather like Clint and Natasha, the cat watched everything.

* * *

“I don't care, he's your brother!”

“I never said...,” Thor started, but Jane held up a finger. “No. You didn't. I guessed fifteen minutes after you arrived back with him. I know. You know. _He_ knows. Tell him to go away.” 

Thor turned an appealing gaze onto Notloki, who was sitting on the windowsill. He got a look of pure disdain back. 

Jane lay back on the pillow and sighed. “Look, I don't mind him being in the apartment with us, really I don't. But he's not watching us...” and her waving hand encompassed the rumpled sheets, the clothes on the floor and Thor's bare torso. 

* * *

 

Darcy was watching television and eating nachos when the knock came to her door. Outside was a rumpled Thor carrying a black cat. The cat glared up at her.

“Oh, hey, there's the cat everyone's talking about.” Darcy grinned up at Thor. “Bringing your pet along...so, you must be planning to stick around, huh?”

Thor grinned back. “That is my dearest wish, Darcy. But I am here to ask you for a favor.”

“Shoot, big guy.”

“Might you watch my cat? I...that is, Jane and I...,” and Darcy was treated to the sight of a blond demi-god blushing.

“ _I_ see. Jealous, is he?” She looked around Thor, and failed to see what she was looking for. “Er, litter box, dude? All ready to help out a friend, but basic facilities needed, you know what I'm saying?”

“Ah. He is of Asgard, so highly intelligent. He uses the toilet. You will need to keep the lid up, and flush afterwards.”

“Seriously? Cool!” and Darcy in her glee completely missed the look of pure hatred flashed up at Thor. Thor looked back and sudden realisation hit him.

“And Darcy, I must insist that you not photograph Notloki. At any time.” He swallowed at the thought of the cat's fury if he ended up on the Facebook.

“Ah, you take all the fun out of cat sitting.” She paused. “Notloki? What's that about?”

Thor paused, then shuffled his feet. “It was a joke,” he said, passing the cat over. The cat leapt out out of his hands, avoided Darcy and in a bound was on top of her bookcase. Notloki settled down into a dignified pose, glaring balefully down at the pair.

“Jeeze, Thor, you need to get in some stand-up while you're here if that's the best you can do. Well, see you later. You and Jane have fun!” The wink she gave was exaggerated, as was the subsequent grin.

“Thank you, Darcy.” But Thor didn't leave. He lingered until Darcy's grin faltered a little and she looked curiously at him. “Anything else I should know? Why the lack of running Jane-wards?”

“I hope...all will be well,” said Thor in a rush, and bowed his way out the door.

Darcy nodded to the cat, then settled back down on the couch. As still as an Egyptian statue, incongruously elegant among Darcy's mementoes, the cat watched her.


	2. The eyes of the cat

Sometimes Thor wondered why Loki ever agreed to the All-Father’s proposal. Granted, the alternative was life imprisonment with restricted visits, but it was not as if his brother was embracing his new life. He still spat and hissed if anyone came close, save Thor himself. And Darcy, of course.

It was not surprising Darcy was an exception. If Fandral was the one being addressed as “sweetheart” and “gorgeous” in that crooning tone, Thor knew his old comrade would now be lying adoringly at her feet, cat-shaped or not. His brother, in contrast, merely approached Darcy of his own free will and moved around her without hissing and arching his back. It was, Thor hoped, some small progress.

Perhaps if Thor had looked closer, he might have seen the calculation in the cat's eyes. He might have noticed that the increasing friendliness was rationed and focused. But Thor did not look closer, because when it came to Loki Thor was still inclined to hope over suspicion.

* * *

Darcy was amused. Notloki (what a god-awful name, Thor, seriously) was fascinated by her laptop. He still went to his perch on top of the bookcase, but if the laptop came out, down he could come, to balance on the edge of the couch and watch.

The first couple of times she’d finished up quickly, because when she glanced at him he had spat and glared. Cruising Youtube is a lot less relaxing when you’re worrying whether your face is about to be clawed off. It was almost as if he realised this, because suddenly he stopped doing it. He tolerated her looking at him, even started to move closer. He couldn’t have paid closer attention if he was going to have a pop quiz on using the laptop later.

“Hey, look at this!” Darcy turned the screen so the cat could see. The GIF was of a cat with its back to the viewer, the thoughts assigned to her by the gif-maker popping up around her head. Then she reared up on her hindlegs and walked towards the camera, exiting stage right. Darcy smiled as she watched. Notloki gave an elaborate yawn as the gif restarted.

“That’s comic gold, you’re just jealous,” Darcy told him. “Now, be good, I’m going to make dinner.” She put the laptop on the coffee table, locked her screen and headed toward the kitchen.

Notloki watched her as she went. Then he leapt lightly from the back of the couch and stalked around the couch. With one movement he was on his hind legs and walked a few steps to where the laptop lay. A look of superiority, a nudge and the password screen came up. He nosed at it and a few laborious clicks later the laptop was unlocked. The cat started to experiment with the software, one ear cocked all the while to the sounds in the kitchen.

* * *

“Ah, cat,” said Bruce, as something brushed against his feet. He moved them back and returned to his papers, his glasses stuck on the top of his head, his tea half-drunk standing forgotten and cold beside him.

At the other end of the table, Natasha and Clint exchanged glances.

“Busy sciencing, Doc?” asked Clint.

“Yeah,” Bruce said absently.

“What would it take to tear you from those papers? Zombie apocalypse?”

“Yeah.”

Clint’s eyes narrowed. He screwed a piece of paper into a ball and lobbed it. Natasha nudged his hand upward just as he let go, so instead of landing in Bruce’s lap it sailed over him and hit the back of Steve’s head as he poured milk into his coffee. Tony snickered and Darcy turned from the coffee pot just in time to see the disgruntled look on Steve’s face.

Clint turned and took a sudden interest in the cat. “Say Tony, are those curtains valuable? Cause the cat’s climbing them.”

Tony flicked a look across at the cat leaping up the fabric and shrugged. “Naturally, Clint, everything in the Tower is valuable. Everywhere, that is, where you aren’t.” Steve crossed the room to sit next to Clint and Natasha and they all watched the small black figure step delicately across the curtain rail, then leap to the next.

“I'm going to call him Salem,” Darcy announced. “He's gorgeous, he needs a better name.”

“I'd go with DC,” returned Tony and raised an eyebrow.

“Ooh, that's good!” chortled Darcy.

“I don't get it,” Steve muttered to Natasha at the table. Tony heard and piped up. “DC. Darn Cat. Name of a cat in a Disney movie with Haley Mills. After your time.”

“Who’s Haley Mills?” and there was a puzzled frown on Darcy's face. “I was thinking of the movie with Christina Ricci. Went to see it with my mom when I was 6, I think.”

As Tony spluttered, Natasha noted Darcy’s suppressed grin with hidden approval and murmured, “That, Steve, is why pop references are over-rated.” Steve hid neither his grin nor his approval.

When Thor came in, they lobbied him for the name change. He smiled with amusement, considered the cat for a moment (who showed no signs of disapproval) and agreed. “Notloki” was now “DC”.

“But I’m still calling you Salem,” Darcy told DC when he arrived to her place that evening. “It’s much cooler. He had snark.”

The cat looked disdainful, as if to say his snark would be vastly superior, if he had any.

* * *

DC continued to investigate everything. From the morning when he followed Thor into the common room, until the evening when he allowed Thor to catch him and carry him out, he lurked in corners and watched everyone. He roved quietly about the building, attempting to enter the vents, peering into cupboards, wandering down to the labs. He roamed free, except when with Thor or Jane, or in Darcy’s apartment in the evenings. He took to regularly visiting Darcy in the lab, jumping on her knee and watching as she worked.  

That was, until after The Incident.

DC had followed Steve Rogers quietly into the elevator, and preceded him into the lab where Jane, Darcy and Erik worked. Darcy looked up as they walked in and a cheeky smile curved her lips.

“Hey gorgeous,” she said, and then as Steve opened his mouth to reply, “Hey, Steve.” Unnoticed, the cat joined her.

Steve closed his mouth again, had a double take and shot an amused look back at her. ”Well, hey Darcy. Having a good day?”

“Not so bad, Erik’s got pants on which helps.” She shuddered for effect. “Walk this way, Jane’s waiting for you.” She picked DC up, put him on the desk and stood up.

“Well, I’ll try, but I can’t make any promises,” Steve returned.

DC watched as they talked and moved across to Jane’s desk. Then he stared at Darcy’s computer screen inscrutably for a moment, and touched the keyboard.

Jane, Steve and Darcy were deep in conversation when an alarm sounded and Erik walked over, a frown on his face. “Darcy, what do you have running? It’s interfering with the testing of the TTD.”

“What? I’m not running anything.” Darcy looked over to her desk just in time to see a tail disappearing over the edge. “Oh shit, Salem!” She rushed over and threw herself into her chair, chanting “ohshitohshitohshit” under her breath. A few clicks and she sagged back against the backrest and swivelled around in one motion. “Okay Erik, check now. Holy shit, what the hell happened?”

Erik looked suspiciously across at her. “Have you been playing with the set-up again?”

“No, honest. The cat must have started some scripts running. I thought I locked the screen.” She spread her hands wide. “I’m really sorry.”

Erik shrugged. “It’s okay, Darcy.” He pulled absently at the waist of his pants and returned to his testing as Steve looked reflectively across at Darcy’s desk.

* * *

“Thing is, she did lock it.”

“How would you know, Father Time?” Tony was burning to get back to his workshop and was regretting ever coming into the common room. “Your girlfriend made a mistake, let it go.”

“She moved the mouse when she got up and the password screen came up.” He flushed a little at Tony’s disbelieving glance. “I notice things. I’m a super soldier, it’s what super soldiers do.”

“So, say she did. So what?”

“So, there’s a breach in security around the Trans-dimensional Transport project. Call me paranoid, but after Pegasus, I’m taking that risk seriously. I’m telling you so you can ensure the project is safe and unlikely to pose a global threat. If you want, I’ll take it to SHIELD and get them to check it out.”

“Okay, okay, don’t get your stars and stripes in a twist,” and Tony chugged back the last of his coffee. “I’ll get someone on it. And it's Project Stargate.”

* * *

Two days later, when Steve walked into the meeting room, Tony swivelled in his chair and held his hands up. “Okay, you were right, I admit it.”

“Well, damn,” Steve replied as he slipped into the seat across the table. “That darn cat! What now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Its nature breaks through the eyes of the cat" - Irish proverb.
> 
> I have planned this all out, but only realised this moment just how appropriate the name [Salem](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salem_Saberhagen) is for Loki. Eerily so. Sabrina the Teenage Witch reference of course. Here's a [gif set](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/74180567022/salem-saberhagen-from-sabrina-the-teenage-witch).
> 
>  _That Darn Cat_ is where the title of this fic comes from, and comes in two varieties, the 1966 version Tony was shown as a kid and the 1997 version Darcy saw. Another obviously appropriate name for cat-Loki! 
> 
> I can't find the GIF that Darcy showed DC, but it was based on [this one](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/74180738558/cat-walks-hind-legs-salsa-dance). And here are [some other cats breaking into computer systems](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/74181099337).
> 
> I'm in this for the cat pics, can you tell?


	3. Who will bell the cat?

Silence fell in the meeting room. Natasha tapped the table thoughtfully. “So, what you’re saying is that someone accessed the systems testing the TTD using Darcy’s computer. But it wasn’t done remotely, there’s no malware on the computer.”

Tony nodded. “None. Well, nothing relevant here. Darcy has an interesting toolset, she should really be in the technology…”

Natasha cut across him. “But the main point is, it had to be done manually. And the only people in the room, besides Steve, were people who had legitimate access.”

“And the cat,” Steve added.

“The cat? Really?” Clint asked.

Tony shrugged. “When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable…”

Hawkeye rolled his eyes. “Gee, thanks for that Sherlock.”

Tony smirked. “And being a great detective, I had logging software put on Darcy’s PC. The system was accessed again yesterday. DC was there at that time too. Not conclusive but suggestive.”

Steve cleared his throat. “It’s an alien cat. Why should we assume he has similar abilities to our cats?”

“Assuming makes an ass out of you and me,” Clint muttered. 

“Or what if it isn’t a cat at all?” Tony added. He was about to speak again when Natasha caught his eye. Plain as words was the message in her eyes: not here, not now, later. He coughed to cover the pause. “Could be controlled or something. Anything is possible.”

“Let’s not make this too complicated,” Natasha said. “Let’s ask Thor.” She shrugged at the dubious looks sent her way. “We trust Thor, don’t we? He brought the cat here, he has responsibility for him. He’ll be able to tell us if it’s plausible the cat did this. If not, we can investigate further.”

“Okay,” Tony put in. “Why don’t you and I do just that. We’ll discuss it after this meeting.”

Bruce spoke for the first time. “And if it was the cat, then what?”

Tony leaned back in his chair with a smug look. “Ah. I’ve got a solution to that.”

* * *

 

When the door closed, Tony put his head to one side and studied Natasha. “So Nat, why do you shut me down back there? It needed to be said. That cat could be anything. Or anyone. That cat could be fucking Loki, Nat.”

“I know,” Natasha replied. She returned Tony’s gaze calmly. “Do you know I encouraged Darcy in renaming the cat?”

Tony shrugged. “No, I didn’t. And?”

“Clint’s come a long way, he's working it out in therapy...but the thought that that cat is Loki? He’s not ready for that, Tony. And it’s plausible. Loki is a shapeshifter, according to his file.”

Tony nodded thoughtfully. “So. I thought you were just nixing the idea.”

“I don’t rule out anything, Tony, you know that. But it’s not the most probable explanation, and it’s not one we should talk about right now. For now we contain him, if you’re happy with that. And we talk to Thor.”  

* * *

 

“Friends!” Thor seemed surprised yet pleased to see Natasha and Tony at the door of the apartment. Tony stuck his head around him and looked in. “Got a moment Thor? Is DC around?”

“DC is with Darcy. Do you wish to see him? Or otherwise?”

“Definitely otherwise,” Natasha said. “We’re sorry to disturb you but can we come in?”

As they sat down Jane and Thor exchanged looks. “I’ll let you talk,” Jane said and vanished. Thor watched as she left and then sat next to Tony. “So, what do you wish to tell me?”

As Tony explained the situation Natasha watched Thor’s face. Just as Steve caught tiny movements in his peripheral vision, Natasha could see micro-expressions flitting across faces, like mice darting briefly into the open. Thor’s surprise was, she was sure, genuine, as was his annoyance at the cat. But the fleeting disappointment fading into resignation was also genuine, and quickly suppressed.

Tony finished.  “So, Thor, are we nuts or could your cat have done this?

“Yes, it is possible. He is intelligent, as are many creatures of Asgard. I should have warned you.” Thor ran a hand through his hair and looked between them both. “What should I do? I can see that he cannot be allowed to roam free.”

Tony leaned forward and gestured as he spoke.  “I can plant a tracking device just under his skin. The signal can be integrated into the security system and sound an alert if he gets into restricted areas. The elevators will no longer allow him to exit at the lab or research floors, and if he somehow bypasses that, the lab doors will shut before he can get in. And security personnel will be called. If he continues to breach security, he’s out. That’s as far as I can go. Sorry Thor.”

Thor gave him a beaming smile. “But this is wonderful, Tony Stark! My pet can still roam free without fear of his curiosity being a danger. You may be sure that I will tell him where he may go.” (Natasha noted a slight clench to Thor’s jaw.) “When shall I bring him to you?”

Tony shrugged. “I’m not doing it. I don’t do blood unless it’s mine. I’ll ask Banner or someone and let you know.”

As they went out the door, Tony stopped and looked back. “There’s nothing else we should know, right? He is just a cat?”

Natasha suppressed an eyeroll and admired the puzzled look on Thor’s face as he replied. “I do not understand, Tony Stark. What else would he be? “

* * *

 

When Darcy opened the door to Thor she had obviously been laughing. “Oh hi Thor! Come on in,” and she put her fingers to her lips. He followed her but a scan of her apartment revealed no sign of DC.

“Where is he, Darcy?” he asked urgently in an undertone.

“Shhh,” Darcy returned. The box in the middle of the floor moved a fraction, then stopped. Thor’s expression changed to bemusement and he looked with raised eyebrows at Darcy, who was grining widely.

 “Tony got me a new laptop. It’s sweet! And even better, it came with a box. Salem has been investigating it.” She kept her voice low and her eyes on the box. “He’s so funny. He held out for ages before starting to play with it. It’s like he’s trying not to be a cat, then the instincts just take over.” Thor saw a glint of green eyes underneath the box. “Are all cats on Asgard like him?”

“He is unusual, even on Asgard,” said Thor, a little grimly. Darcy gave him a look and he forced a smile. “But what of your present? Does it have many ‘features’?”

“Oh, it so does. Even comes with iris detection. No more passwords for me! Tony is the best boss. After Jane, natch.”

“Of course. I will take the cat now, so you may enjoy your laptop in peace.”

Darcy shrugged. “Okay. We could probably do with some _alone time_.” She crooned the last words, and the croon continued as she spoke to the box. “Come on out Salem.” The box did not move. Thor crossed the room, picked it up and grabbed the cat in one movement. The cat wriggled and scratched him, but Thor held fast.

“Ouch! You must have startled him. Want me to take a look?”

“No, Darcy. I have already asked too much of you.” Thor’s grim look was back and he walked quickly towards the door.

Darcy watched Thor leave with a puzzled look on her face, then shrugged and went to play with her new toy.

* * *

Jane was waiting for Thor. “Thor, we have to tell Darcy something.”

Thor shook his head. “There is no need.” He loosened his grip on the cat, who sprang from his hands and leaped to the top of the bookcase. “He has abused her trust for the last time.” He turned to the cat. “Our father clearly did not make your situation clear to you. You will not be able to pass through a portal any more than you would through a door. All your attempts have gained you is curtailing of your liberty. From now on you will stay in this apartment.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is from an [English fable](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Belling_the_cat).
> 
> Clint and Erik are both damaged from Loki's takeover, perhaps less than in the movie since the time involved was shorter and because Coulson didn't die, but still damaged. Just want to nod at scifigrl47's great fic, [Hollow Your Bones Like a Bird's](http://archiveofourown.org/works/632488/chapters/1144220). In my head, Clint is seeing the Dr. O'Brien from that fic in the background of this one.
> 
> From Tumblr, [gratuitous cat in a box.](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/74607316534/secretingredients-marus-at-it-again) Also, [1960s That Darn Cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/74608478275/music-books-designer-fashion-clothes-sale-photography-he) and [1990s That Darn Cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/74608591056).


	4. More than one way...

As the security meeting wore on, a frown grew on Darcy’s face. After the meeting she grabbed Jane before the scientist could escape into her work.

“So, this is anything to do with what happened with Salem the other day?”

Jane looked up and spoke as noncommittally as she could manage.  “Well, it was a factor, I guess.”

Darcy wasn’t finished. “So he’s not allowed down here any more? That sucks.”

“Well, pets shouldn’t really be down here anyway, Darcy.” Jane’s eyes wandered to her computer screen.

“Yeah, I guess. Still, I can play with him tonight. It’s all good.”

Jane paused, then looked up as Darcy started to move away. “Darcy? Why don’t you come to my place after work?”

Darcy turned back and grinned. “And play with Salem there? Sure! I won’t be interrupting true love’s dream or anything, will I?”

“No,” said Jane. She didn’t smile.

When Darcy arrived at Jane's place, she looked around, then turned to Jane with surprise. “Hey, where’s Salem?” she asked, handing a pint of Ben and Jerry’s _Phish Food_ over to Jane. Jane opened it, got two spoons and brought the lot over to the couch. When Darcy sat down she put the ice-cream and a spoon in her hands.

“Darcy, I have to tell you something. Thor’s cat won’t be going to your place any more.”

“What? Why the hell not?” Darcy stared round eyed at Jane, then took a mouthful of ice-cream. “Didn’t I look after him well? Scratch that, I did look after him well. What gives?”

Jane sighed. “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, so don’t tell anyone. Yes, the increased security was due to DC. Thor took it to heart, and he’s keeping DC with him in his apartment.”

“Wait, roll it back a bit. _His_ apartment?” Darcy’s brow puckered. She took another spoon of ice-cream and handed the pint over. Jane dug in, ate some and sighed.

“Yes, he had an apartment assigned to him when he got here. He…we decided he’d move in here. I didn’t mind DC…but..” and she took another spoon. “I don’t think it’s wise to keep DC in an apartment all day. I really don’t, Darcy.”

Darcy’s eyes were wide, considering the implications of what she heard. “So what happened?”

“We argued about it,” and Jane shrugged. “We couldn’t agree. I never had a pet, but I don’t think DC will take well to being stuck in one place and with being alone if Thor has to go on a mission. So I said if Thor was doing it, he wouldn’t be doing it here. So,” another spoon of ice-cream, “he moved out.”

“Oh Jane.” Darcy’s eyes were sad. Jane noticed and shook her head.

“We’re still together, so don’t look like that. We just have to decide how to make this work. Thor feels responsible and that’s reasonable. I just think he’s doing the wrong thing.”

Darcy took the ice-cream back. “But why does he feel so responsible? It was my fault, I left the screen unlocked. I’ll go tell him,” and she started to stand up, ready to go and fix it. But Jane was shaking her head.

“It’s not as simple as that.” Darcy sat and watched her friend collect her thoughts. Jane spoke, choosing each word with care. “I know DC looks like any cat, but he is from Asgard. He’s intelligent. Very intelligent. Thor blames himself for not making that clear. For allowing the security breach happen.”

Darcy’s brow puckered and her lips twisted up at the corners. “You’re saying that Thor thinks his cat did it on purpose?” Jane shrugged, then nodded.

Darcy flopped back and looked at the ceiling. “Oh, my actual god.” She thought a moment and sat forward again. “But, like, locking Salem up can’t be the only way. He could come to my place, my laptop is…oh.” Her mind ran quickly, putting all the pieces together. “So Tony knows. He’ll have an answer, he’s a freaking genius.” But Jane was shaking her head again.

“That’s not the problem, it’s getting Thor to accept it. He’s still…he underestimates humans, I think.”

“So what do we do now?” Darcy asked. “I don’t care what Salem’s IQ is, he’ll go nuts stuck in one place with nothing to do.”

“The high IQ will probably make it worse,” Jane agreed. “But right now, there’s not much we can do except wait to pick up the pieces.”

Darcy didn’t accept that. The next day she hung around the common room until Tony appeared and bent his ear. Tony looked at her with amusement, but sympathy lurked in the deep brown eyes.

“Darcy, I tried. I can’t wrestle the cat from him. Thor’s going to do what he thinks is right.”

Tony watched her retreating, disappointed back. When she was gone he spoke aloud.

“JARVIS? Track DC would you? I want to know when the inevitable happens.”

* * *

Thor might speak of trust and protecting the weak all he wished, but it made no difference to Loki. In the end the choice offered in Asgard was no choice at all. The real choice was either to be imprisoned for all eternity alone in a box, or to stay imprisoned on Midgard, in the shape of a cat, in a box with Thor.

Solitude seemed vastly preferable, at this point.

And, true, he had sought escape. Not for now or tomorrow, but for a day not far off. It was wisdom, not the betrayal Thor thought it. Did Thor really think Loki was safe here? Did he really think that the Chitauri would ignore his desertion? That their master would forgive?

It had been long, very long, since he had lived in such a shape as this. He had almost forgot the drag of instinct, the battle to preserve the sanity of two very different modes of thought that only magic could allow in the same skull. It was like swimming in white water, the river swollen with melted snow. It was of no use to fight it constantly. The secret was to go with the river as much as possible, to become one with the current, while keeping your head above water and directing yourself within the flow to your destination.

But now Loki was swimming hard against the current. For his feline side was restless, away from the places it knew, away from all distractions and amusements. That restlessness infected him, and he could find no refuge from it in reading or in magic. All those were closed to him in this shape and in Thor’s bare apartment. There was no escape from his memories tearing at him, memories of resentment and slights and a life in the shadows. The cat they called DC paced the bare apartment, and Loki’s mind sought the only escape it could, in plotting.

* * *

“I will not be long, brother.” Thor’s eyes followed the cat, and the concern in them seeped into his voice. “I will obtain more food, and some amusements for you, perhaps.” The cat continued to pace as if he had not spoken. Thor sighed. “I know this is not easy, but you must understand that I cannot allow you to injure these people.” He waited a moment, sighed again, and left.

The black figure continued to pace up and down, like a lion in too small a cage. After fifteen minutes had passed, he stopped. The iron control lifted, and the cat’s instincts were allowed full reign.

 Thor returned an hour and a half later and froze in the doorway in surprise. Every object that had been on a shelf or other surface lay scattered on the ground. The curtains hung in ribbons and the couch was ripped, with the interior of one arm exposed like bone in a wound.

It was a scene of utter devastation. Thor walked into the centre of it and spoke one word, low, warning. “Loki!” Noiseless as a shadow a small black figure slipped behind him out the door.

* * *

Many floors up, JARVIS cleared his virtual throat. “Sir, a scheduled alert…”

“Save it, JARVIS, if it’s not a matter of life and death I’ll get to it later.”

“Very good sir,” and Tony ignored the hint of long-suffering in the tone.

Tony still hadn’t remembered to ask about the alert by the time he went to the common room for coffee. Steve, Natasha and Clint were there, deep in conversation. On the floor of the kitchen liquid pooled around the shattered coffee jug.

“Aw guys, who killed the coffee?” Tony whined.

“Probably DC,” Natasha said, turning towards him.

Tony pursed his lips. “Really? Thought he was in Thor’s custody. Why do you think that?”

“Because he also pooped in my shoes.” Steve moved toward Tony and held the offending articles up to him.

Tony made to look in and backed off. “I’ll take your word for it.” He moved across the room towards the coffee table and picked up a hardback notebook from the floor. Shredded paper fell from it as he rejoined the group.“I think your hypothesis may be correct, Nat.” On the cover words were still visible, “Property of Tony Stark. DO NOT TOUCH.”

Natasha raised an eyebrow. Tony grinned. “Decoy. Thought this would go down. Planning ahead.”

“Surprisingly insightful,” Natasha said.

“Damn right,“ Clint nodded, “Who knew Stark had any idea just how annoying he is?”

 “Oh ha ha, Katniss,” Tony returned. “You’ll be laughing on the other side when the cat poops in your quiver.”

“It was in the gym locker room at the same time as Steve’s shoes,” Clint returned. “Guess he doesn’t find me as irritating as he finds you.”

“He didn’t attack my equipment either,” Natasha said.

“All that proves is he’s not fucking insane,” Clint replied. Their eyes met and realisation dawned in them both at the same time. They spoke simultaneously.

“Fuck,” said Clint.

“Banner,” said Natasha.

Steve and Tony exchanged glances and were out the door ahead of them. The same idea was in all their minds. DC had taken revenge on two of the three people who had been present when the tracking device was placed under his skin. Only one was left.

“JARVIS, location on DC,” Tony yelled.

“Elevator lobby on this floor. He is currently crouched on top of a rubber plant.” JARVIS didn’t say “I told you so,” it was clear in the AI’s voice. “Before you ask, Mr Banner’s elevator door has just opened.” Tony groaned and ran faster. They were feet away from the double doors to the lobby when they heard the roar.  

“This is ours, Tony,” Steve said as Natasha and Clint caught up. Clint nocked an arrow and the two went on into the lobby. Natasha followed and fixed Tony with a glare before going through the swinging doors. Tony sighed and was making a mental note to wear the homing bracelets for the Ironman armor at all times when a black blur rushed past Natasha and down the hall. Tony raised his eyebrows and followed it.

Behind the doors, Steve was talking calmingly to the Hulk. He moved sideways and the Hulk moved to keep in sight. Natasha slipped in to Steve’s right allowing Clint to take position behind the giant figure. He shot and hit the broad arm. The Hulk turned with a growl and fell. The three gathered around him as the Hulk muttered something then fell unconscious.

Steve frowned. “What did he say?”

The corner of Clint’s mouth quirked upwards. “Could be wrong, but it sounded like ‘pussy cat’ to me.”

* * *

 

When Steve arrived in the common room with Thor, Tony was sitting on the coffee table. He beckoned at the pair and mouthed, “He’s here.”

Steve shrugged, walked over to the couch and tilted it backwards. A black shape flew out from under it, and rushed for the far wall. Then it suddenly swerved and headed straight for Darcy, who was being ushered into the room by Natasha. An instant later the cat was in her arms, being crooned at soothingly. Natasha raised an eyebrow at the three men across the room.

“I have always heard,” she said, “that there was more than one way to skin a cat.”

Darcy gave her a dirty look, and cuddled the trembling DC closer. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is, obviously, based on the proverb Natasha says at the end. 
> 
> Obligatory Tumblr links (both by the same great artist): [Loki plotting](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/75244791385/homeiswheretheheartsare-click-for-animation). [Hulk hugging](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/75244868019/homeiswheretheheartsare-hulk-hug-puny-god-loki) (yes. Not Hulk Smash). And[ this](http://www.alphabetagamer.com/catlateral-damage-open-alpha/), via [Glory_Jean](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Glory_Jean/pseuds/Glory_Jean) in the comments, gives some idea of Loki!cat destruction!


	5. Fighting like cats...

The cat still trembled in Darcy’s arms. Loki was glad of her presence, it allowed him to relax his control over his feline nature and listen to what was going on around him. Relax, but not let go entirely, for he could feel the tension in her. Now he was listening, he understood why. She was speaking to Thor. “So you can keep him in like you did before?” she hissed softly. “Look how well that turned out!”

Thor shook his head. “You do not understand. I sought only to prevent harm…”

Darcy shook her head. “I understand plenty. He did stuff he shouldn’t, I get that. But he’s a cat and he’s smart. Locking him up only made it worse.”

“She’s got a point,” Tony drawled from the sidelines. “We came up with a solution. Maybe you should have trusted it. Because, hey, it worked out better than yours. How long were you looking for him when Steve tracked you down?”

Thor turned his head. “A half an hour perhaps?”

Tony shrugged. “Took us, oh, maybe 30 seconds to find him?” His face grew serious. “Could have avoided a lot of trouble if you’d told us we should be looking. Is that the way it’s going to be, Point Break? You do what you want, we pick up the pieces?”

Thor turned fully now. “You do not understand. I had reasons…” Darcy felt the cat flinch as the voices got louder and stroked him gently.

Tony looked up to heaven, hands appealing for divine intervention, then looked back at the demi-god in front of him. He spoke quickly, waving arms emphasising each point. “Yeah. I kinda assumed you had reasons. Same way I assume you had reasons when you took your brother off that transport after we’d gone to the trouble of picking him up.” His eyes narrowed. “How did that last little intervention turn out, by the way? You never did say what happened to him.”

Thor’s face hardened, becoming the commanding face of a prince. “That is none of your concern.”

Tony’s smirk was almost a sneer. “You telling me not to worry my pretty little head? Sure. But what goes on in MY Tower IS my concern. So, why no heads up on the stray, Blondie?”

“Do you think I must tell my reasons? Are you my father or my king?”

“I’m your goddamn landlord, so you can tell me or go the fuck away. What’s the deal? What aren’t you…”

“Tony!” Natasha’s voice cut through Tony’s like a laser through chocolate. “That’s enough,” she said in a softer tone. “This is unproductive and unnecessary. All this may be out of our hands. A report will have to go to SHIELD about this.”

Tony’s face fell from anger into concern in an instant. “Aw, goddamn it Natasha,” he said, face puckered. “Bruce doesn’t need that. It’s…do we really have to do that?”

Natasha nodded, serene as ever. “Yes, we do. You know that we do. I don’t believe that it will cause any problems for Bruce. He had provocation.” Thor’s and Tony’s eyes both moved to where Darcy had been standing. She was gone.

Natasha remained impassive. “She left. The cat was becoming agitated.”

“You should not have let her go.” Thor headed to the door, but Natasha stepped in front of him. “One moment, Thor. I need to talk to you.”   

“I’ll get after her,” Tony offered. Nat moved to let him past, then fixed Thor with a stare.

“Thor. Why didn’t you tell SHIELD about the cat?”

Thor returned her gaze, but a muscle twitched at the corner of his eye. “Did I not? I suppose I thought it too trivial a matter to concern them.”

“I doubt Coulson will agree,” Natasha pointed out. “We have quarantine regulations. That would have been a better time to show concern for us, instead of locking us out now.”

Thor sighed. “What do you want me to do?”

“Do you want to stay here?”

“Yes, I do,” and the blue eyes were steady and emphatic.

Natasha nodded and her voice softened. “Then take my advice. Allow Tony and Darcy to talk before collecting DC. She is likely to win him over and you need all the allies you can get. Come clean with Coulson tomorrow. And you need to let us in. Trust us. If you want to be part of the team, act like it.”

* * *

Thor came to Jane’s door looking uncannily like a golden retriever who had been scolded. “Oh dammit,” she muttered under her breath and wrapped him in as large a hug as she could manage. A moment later she was swept off her feet and tucked into Thor’s shoulder.

“I feared you would be angry with me also,” he said into her hair. She pulled her head back and looked at him. “You want to talk about it?”

They ended up on the couch, his head in her lap. She stroked his hair and absent-mindedly twisted it as he talked.

“All I thought of was protecting them. Why do they not understand this?”

“They’re not children, Thor.” He focused on her face as she gathered her thoughts. “Tony and Steve brought down Loki, don’t forget.”

“Only because he allowed them.”

“Maybe.” Jane tilted her head. “But they also brought down Loki’s organisation after you left. Look, I know we seem weak and primitive compared to what you’re used to. But we can look after ourselves. Don't underestimate us.”

“I do not think you weak or primitive,” and Thor’s face was serious. “How could I think myself better – me and mine have brought nothing but war here. I do not wish to do that again.”

Jane kissed his forehead. “I think you’re going to have to work with Tony and the rest to do that. From what Coulson told me, if Tony Stark is lecturing you on teamwork, you really need to work at it.”

Thor leaned his head back, and kissed her on the lips. “You are wise, Jane. I should have listened to you in the beginning.”

Jane smiled. “And that includes Darcy, Thor. She wants to help. Please let her.”

* * *

“And that’s the last I remember before waking up here.” Bruce was being debriefed by Steve with Clint sitting in. As usual, Bruce had had a medical check up and been told what damage had been done. Steve had found that otherwise Bruce could not answer questions effectively. The dread of what he might have done was too much.

“Well, it was a minor incident,” Steve said, as reassuringly as he could. “You did less damage than the cat did. It’ll go to Coulson but it will be all routine. Nothing to worry about.”

Bruce’s brow was still wrinkled. Clint leaned in from his perch. “So, you like cats Doc?”

Bruce quirked a brow in his direction. “I don’t mind them. Why?” He turned to Steve again. “You said there was no damage. I didn’t hurt the cat, right?”  

“No, not hurt, “ drawled Clint with a grin on his face. “Just scared him a little. Mainly because a ten ton green giant tried to hug him.”

“Really?” and there was a ghost of a smile of Bruce’s face.

“Would I lie to you doc? Cutest damn thing I ever saw.” Steve nodded to Clint as Bruce smiled fully and relaxed against the couch for the first time.

* * *

Both Darcy and the car turned at the tap on her apartment door.  She shrugged and ignored it. The tap came again.

“Hey, Darcy, it’s me. Tony. Can we talk?”

Darcy shrugged again, walked to the door and threw it open. Tony strolled in a step and grinned a wide, charming grin. “Don’t worry, Nat has the big lug at bay.”

Darcy jerked a thumb and he moved into the room. She closed the door, crossed her arms and looked at him. “You weren’t exactly helping.”

Tony stretched his hands. “Hey, I was trying.”

“By kicking Salem out of the tower?”

“Salem…oh yeah. I’m not kicking him out, Darce. I said I’d help and I’m trying.” He glanced at the cat, peeping around the edge of the couch. “It doesn’t help that he’s a little shit.”

“He isn’t!” Darcy leapt once more to the cat’s defence. “Look, I know you don’t know him, and I know he thrashed your stuff, but he was locked up.  When he’s got stuff to do, he’s a cutie pie.”

“He damn near took Steve’s face off when he tried to pet him.”

Darcy shrugged. “He just needs his space, you know? When he gets to know you he’s plenty friendly. He just needs time.”

Tony took a few steps across the room and sprawled onto the couch. “I can relate. Look, why don’t you tell me what you’ve been up to with the new tech, and maybe the cat will chill and I’ll see what you see in the furball.” Darcy looked undecided and Tony played his trump card. “Thor’s got ants in his armor about this. If I leave, he’s coming straight in here to get his cat back. Think of me as the price you pay for cat quality time.”

Darcy grinned. “Sure. Wanna beer?”

Over the next hour Tony and Darcy talked tech, Tony tried unsuccessfully to headhunt her to his IT division and DC tried successfully to be cute. He explored the apartment, walking delicately along shelves and making seemingly impossible leaps. He hunted toys, leaping on them and jumping back. By the time Thor knocked at the door, he had unwound enough to rub against Tony’s legs and allow one pat before skittering away and investigating Darcy's knitting.  

Darcy opened the door and looked up into Thor’s apologetic face. “Hey Thor. I was all for declaring you an unfit parent and going the custody battle route. Tony talked me out of it.”

“You’re welcome,” came a holler from the couch.

“I regret any sorrow I caused you, Darcy. DC may visit you as often as you wish.”

The corner of Darcy’s mouth went up. “Ah thanks, big guy.” She attempted a hug. “Let’s never fight again,” she said in dramatic tones, as Tony snickered.

Thor patted her shoulder, amused. “But in the meantime I must bring him home. Where is he?”

Darcy pointed and Thor crossed the room, to be confronted with a cat hopelessly tangled in wool. The green eyes glared, daring Thor to laugh. He managed to keep a straight face.

“I was just rescuing him when you knocked,” Darcy said, a touch anxiously. “I can just…” but Thor waved her words away. “It is no matter. I will do it and return the wool to you. Thank you Darcy.”

“And I guess I’ll hit the road too,” Tony said, swinging himself up off the couch. “No hard feelings Point Break. Your cat’s a riot.” He headed out the door, and was out of sight by the time Thor left.

Thor didn’t speak until safely back in his own apartment. Then he sat among the wreckage and surveyed the wool-wrapped cat. A huge smile broke across his face.

“You like her, brother. Do not deny it.”

The cat sat as regally as is possible when tangled in wool, as if such things as liking were beneath him. Thor’s grin did not fade one iota. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Fighting like cats and dogs" in this chapter! 
> 
> Sorry it was late, so as recompense have some [gratuitous cute kittens](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/77062510923/rift-in-the-warp-notyouraverageassh0le-the) (so you can tell what Loki!Cat was aiming for), an [exploring cat being regal](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/77062547744/tastefullyoffensive-groovydave810) and this great art of [Loki!cat all tangled up. ](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/77062780065/homeiswheretheheartsare-that-was)
> 
> Bonus! [Art by HomeIsWhereTheHeartIs of Loki reading this fic (scroll down).](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/75888098542/homeiswheretheheartsare-canterburyfic-that) I for one welcome our new fluffy overlord.


	6. Fine Words Don't Feed Cats

Coulson sat in the meeting room in Stark Tower, impassive and well groomed as ever, and mused on the oddities of life. When Fury had told him they needed their best man as full time contact for the Avengers, he had assumed it was a gentle way of putting him out to pasture. He’d thought that he would get bored.

He had been wrong. It wasn’t boring. It wasn’t much like his old Delta Five life either. It was more like running a kindergarten. Or a zoo.

The easy job got cleared away first. Steve and Clint made their report, Coulson rubber-stamped it and Steve hurried away to reassure Dr Banner. Across the table, Clint and Phil exchanged glances, then grins.

“Cats,” said Phil, with a raised eyebrow.

“Cats,” said Clint with a shrug. “Whoda thought.”

“Okay,” said Phil, and made a note.

“On it,” said Clint, nodded and left.

About the same amount of information was exchanged in the next one-to-one, but using a lot more verbiage. Unsurprising, when talking to Tony Stark. The take-away was that Tony was prepared to have Thor and his pet continue to live in the Tower, that security was in place, and that any further trouble would be reported to SHIELD.

“Got a team working on making the place more cat friendly,” Tony tossed a file across the table, “but that’s it as far as I’m concerned. Got no more time to spend on this. If there’s more trouble, I _will_ call.”

“That’s all I ask,” said Coulson. Reading between the lines, more trouble and Thor would be out. Given some of the projects in the building, Coulson preferred it that way. Another offer of Tony’s private jet for Coulson to make a flying visit to Portland, and Tony was gone.

The next was going to be more interesting. Coulson wondered if Thor would look less awkward if Coulson was on a throne rather than across a table. Perhaps Fury would have made him feel more at home. Coulson had the impression that Fury and Odin had more in common than a missing eye.

“So, Prince Thor. Imagine my surprise on hearing yesterday that, not only had a cat triggered a Hulk Incident a mere week after causing a security scare on one of our more sensitive projects, but that it was _your_ cat. A cat brought all the way from Asgard that you completely failed to mention when we debriefed you.”

Thor sat, impassive, waiting. Coulson sighed internally.

“Why didn’t you tell us about the cat, Prince Thor?”

“I thought it no great matter,” Thor said, hands spread wide.

“Well, it looks like you were wrong there. Perhaps if you had told us, or at least told Mr Stark that your pet’s intelligence and curiosity might prove…problematic, some of this could have been averted.”

Thor’s hands moved to the edge of the table. “Must we return to Asgard?”

Coulson flipped through a file. “No,” he said, not looking up. “Mr Stark is very forgiving.” He glanced up quickly and caught the relief on Thor’s face. “You and the cat can stay here _as long as I agree_. Now, Prince Thor, why should I agree to the cat staying here?”

This was clearly a question that Thor had not expected. His eyes fell to the table as thought wrinkled his forehead. When he spoke, it was slowly, his words carefully chosen.

“It is difficult for me to explain. The cat is the price of my being here, a charge laid on me by Odin. If he returns to Asgard, so must I.”

“The question I have to ask,” Coulson said, “is whether having you here is worth that price.”

Thor looked up from the table, his eyes troubled. “I have come here to protect Midgard. I swear to you that I will serve faithfully, and do all in my power to preserve this realm and the people who live here.”

“Might I suggest that bringing an alien life form to this world without telling us isn’t the best start?” Coulson dropped the folder and picked up another. “Moving animals between countries requires quarantine of six months.” He saw Thor’s slight confusion at the unfamiliar word and expanded. “Put into isolation to ensure the animal is healthy. To prevent the spread of disease.”

Thor’s look of confusion did not abate. “We have no disease on Asgard. I can assure you…”

“Your assurances carry less weight than they used to.” Coulson studied a page and looked up again. “The cat will have to be examined and blood samples taken to ensure that he is disease free. Until we get the all-clear he will need to be segregated from the other personnel in the building. A week should cover it. That is the furthest I can go to accommodate you.” He stood up before Thor could speak. “Those are my terms. Once it’s confirmed the cat isn’t a bio hazard, you can stay. You are directly responsible for him, and if any, and I mean any, further problems arise you and he will have return to Asgard.”

Thor stood too. “Very well,” he said. He grasped Coulson’s hand and squeezed gently. Coulson relaxed slightly. The memory of an early handshake that required an ER visit was still fresh. “My apologies and my thanks, Son of Coul.”

As Thor opened the door, Coulson gave a discrete cough. “Before you go, is there anything else we should know about the cat? Anything at all?”

Thor turned. “I do not know what else I can tell you.” Coulson nodded. It was what he had expected.

He sat for ten minutes after Thor left, going through the files again. The door opened softly. “Come on in,” Phil Coulson said, without looking up. Even if he had not been expecting anyone, the silence would have confirmed who the visitor was.

“Thanks for the intel,” Phil said, as he lifted his head from the files. The Black Widow nodded.

“I should have checked.” Natasha’s face and voice were untroubled. “I did not expect Thor to be less than forthright.”

“Who did?” agreed Phil. “At least we had some forewarning. So, we still can’t rule out the worst case scenario?”

“No,” said Natasha. “As you can see from my analysis, it’s unlikely but still possible.”

“Clint?”

“Has no suspicion. I would prefer to keep it that way.”

 “Agreed,” said Phil. “Stark is being surprisingly co-operative.”

A smile curved Natasha’s lips. “He is trying to get on Darcy Lewis’ good side. He wants her skills. She likes the cat.”

“He must want them very much,” said Phil, and tossed the file marked “SI: Project Fuzzball” over to her. She flicked through it quickly.

“Will this take 180 pounds?” she said, turning around the file to show a page.

“Isn’t that excessive over-engineering for a cat?” Phil returned.

“Not for Clint.”

Phil Coulson’s eyes widened, then closed. “Of course. I should have thought of that.”

“I’ll talk to Pepper,” Natasha said, and the corners of her mouth quirked up.

As Natasha left, Coulson reconsidered. Not a zoo. A circus. And honestly? He wouldn’t have it any other way.

Upstairs Thor was knocking on Jane’s apartment door. Her smile as she opened it wobbled as she took in the earnest expression.

“Jane, I must ask of you a great favor…”

* * *

Loki was irked. He was irritated beyond measure. Of all the outcomes he had considered, another week confined with Thor was not one of them. But why should he be surprised? His little prank had not concluded as he expected either. He had thought the Beast would be chained away until SHIELD had need of him, not roaming around the Tower of Stark, drinking coffee and addressed as Doc. It was not something he could ever have predicted.     

When he had the Tesseract in his possession (a lifetime ago, it seemed) it had given the scientist visions of the fabric of reality, and the archer directions for his current mission. But to Loki himself it had given the future. It was hazy, but he had seen that the invasion attempt was doomed. It seemed that the only alternative to death was a return to Asgard and punishment. It was certain that his future and Thor’s were deeply entwined. More than that was unclear.

He wondered if he had ensured he had not known the location of the Tesseract when infiltrating the carrier, would things have gone differently on that dark mountainside. As things were now, it was preferable that he stay near Thor, and therefore remain on Midgard. Despite the cost to his sanity, Loki would have to remain on his best behaviour.

It was a pleasant surprise when Loki discovered that the dolt had shown unexpected insight and recruited the mortal Darcy Lewis to assist. Loki knew, intellectually, that he could not maintain an iron grip on his feline side without eventually losing control entirely. But his pride revolted against behaving like a cat in front of Thor. With Darcy Lewis he felt no such compunction. And if Thor persisted in the delusion that Loki could have a liking for a mortal, even in this feline state, well, so much the better.

That would be his strategy, then. He would reserve his power to enable him to maintain his dignity with Thor and to take any opportunity that might offer itself. For the rest, for the other inhabitants of the Tower, he would be a cat. Their opinion was of no consequence.

DC submitted without protest to examination and with only a yowl to the drawing of his blood, while Loki looked through his eyes and considered the mirror that made up one wall of the examination room.

* * *

Coulson had watched the examination from behind mirrored glass; he wasn’t inclined to go on the cat’s revenge list and end up with poop in his shoes. At one point the cat had looked directly at him, green eyes fixed despite the shield between them. Coulson sucked in a breath as the hairs stood on the back of his neck, and as he did so he sensed Natasha watching him.

Idiots (who unfortunately were in SHIELD, just like everywhere else) sometimes talked about how he was the “voice of reason” in the team. If they were really hard-of-thinking, they might even mention Black Widow’s “intuition”. The exact opposite was the case. Natasha was the most rational person Phil Coulson had ever known. Clint operated from conviction. Phil was the one with the hunches and the gut feelings. He felt one now. There was something uncanny about that cat.

“It’s nothing,” he said, for Natasha’s benefit. “Goose on my grave.”

He could almost hear her adjusting probabilities in her head.

* * *

DC had a clean bill of health. Thor could stay in the Tower. Jane’s sanity was restored by Darcy’s return to the lab.

“You’re a cooling rod,” Jane told Darcy on her return.

“Gee, thanks,” said Darcy. “All these compliments, I might give up my future career in cat-sitting.” It had been far from the worst week’s work Darcy had ever done. Salem was now permitting the odd cuddle. If she sat down to read, he leapt into her lap, though unlike _some_ cats Darcy had known, he allowed her to actually see the pages. She had high hopes of tummy rubs in the near future. It was pretty sweet, if confining.  

“It _is_ a compliment,” said Jane. “Without the cooling rods, you don’t get a controlled reaction. You get an explosion.” Her face went bleak. “Chaos.”

Darcy made a show of examining her nails. “I guess I did prevent DC meltdown. Go me.”

“We had meltdown here.” Bad coffee, everyone’s inability to read Jane’s writing and the lack of a strong hand with the interns and a voice declaring the lab “closed. Now. Like, don’t you guys have lives? At all?” had resulted in an unproductive week. Jane lowered her voice. “You cannot have any idea what a nightmare this last seven days have been. Next time Thor asks for a favor, I’m saying no.”

“Sure you are,” said Darcy, dead-pan. Then she grinned widely. “The things we do so the Norse god of lovin’ can stick around. Never fear, Darcy is here.”

Darcy spent the day putting the lab to rights, then spent ten minutes changing for a night on the town. She so deserved it. She totally ruled at being a cooling rod.

The next morning she went straight to the lab, so she was the last to know about the changes to the common room. When she rolled in, the first thing she saw was Natasha with an amused smile on her face. The next was that the art on the left wall had been replaced with metal and wood painted in bright colors, some of which extended out along the ceiling. Part modern art, part…what? Shelves? It reminded her of something but she couldn’t think what.

Inevitably, Clint was perched on one ledge halfway between ceiling and floor.

“The hell?” Darcy asked.

Natasha turned and nodded to her. “Did Tony not tell you? These are to amuse the cat.” A smile curved her lips again. “And Clint.”

“For real?” Now Darcy looked she realised there were walkways and nets and little hidey holes, just like an adventure playground her mom used to bring her to. A black tail hung from one of the nooks, twitching gently. “It’s a kitty playground. Sweet!” Then another thought struck her. “How the hell will I get him down?”

Natasha’s smile widened. “Leave that to me.”

As she approached the wall, Clint hung upside down by his legs. “Knew you couldn’t hold out, Tasha.” She shook her head at him, and rapidly scaled the wall. With one swift motion a hand went into the nook and emerged, holding DC by the scruff of the neck. She spoke gently to the cat in Russian. “Hush, little one. I have you.” The cat stiffened, then relaxed, dangling from her hand. Two moves and she was down, the cat cradled in her arms.

Clint shrugged, flipped so he was holding on by his fingers and moved along the walkway, hand over hand, body dangling down. Natasha crossed the room to Darcy and once Clint was out of earshot, her words changed, though the soft croon in Russian remained constant.

“You understand me, I think, little one,” she said. The cat looked up at her with blank, unreadable eyes. “You have won your freedom in this place but know this. If the Green Man comes again or you pose any danger, you will go back where you came from. Yes you will, little one, no matter what the demi-god says. We are watching.”

“Was that Russian?” Darcy asked. “It’s beautiful. I think Salem likes it.”

“Perhaps he does,” Natasha replied, handing the cat over. “Perhaps it calms him.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A talky chapter.
> 
> The title is from the Italian proverb, "belle parole non pascono i gatti", which means that words don't get the job done. Perhaps they will in this case.
> 
> Obligatory Tumblr pics! Tony's team got a [customised version of this cat playground equipment](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/77936407550/overhead-cat-playgrounds-by-goldtatze) from German company [GoldTatze](http://www.goldtatze.de/). Here's [Natasha with a non-Loki black cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/77936064960/stormxpadme-marvel-comics-bites-and-snippets) from Marvel's "Black Widow" (out recently). 
> 
> And from HomeIsWhereTheHeartsAre, [Lokitty and a spider](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/77936722483/chapter-6-of-that-darn-cat-is-up-on-ao3-anyone).


	7. The Cat's Meow

“Hi Nat.” Pepper strolled into the common room then stopped short in amazement. Clint and a black cat appeared to be having an athletics contest up and down the far wall.

Natasha turned to her, an amused look on her face. “You would know you hadn’t been here before.”

“Well, I see why the cat toys needed the extra weight tolerance.” Pepper shook her head as if to clear it, then looked around. “Any sign of Tony?”

Natasha tilted her head. “No. He’s rarely here these days. Just flying visits for coffee.” She watched Pepper’s face as concern and exasperation flitted across it. Pepper caught her watching and shrugged.

“Oh, it’s just last minute Halloween party stuff.” She paused as the black cat jumped up on the counter and pushed under her hand. “But…,” and Natasha waited as Pepper collected her thoughts.

“I’m worried, Nat. He always worked long hours but it’s getting crazy.” Pepper shrugged. “I guess we need to get him another assistant.” She stroked the cat and looked mischievously at Natasha. “Interested?”

Natasha held up both hands. “No. Toughest assignment I ever had.”

“Sides, she doesn’t have time.” Clint had joined them. “She’s too busy doing make-overs.”

* * *

Darcy considered asking if Natasha was sure about this, but there was something in Natasha’s intense concentration as she tweaked Darcy’s dress that made her think that was not a good idea.

Yeah, what she could see in the full length mirror looked good. It just didn’t look like her.

She looked across at Salem, sitting upright and alert. “What do you think, Salem?” The reply was an enthusiastic meow.

“You see,” Natasha said, and Darcy could see in the mirror one corner of her mouth was turned up. “The cat has taste. Trust the cat. And trust me. Remember, walk in, head high.”

“Maoh!” said the cat again, and Natasha quirked an eye at him. “Yes, malyutka, as you do.”

“Are you sure it’s not too tight around my butt?” Darcy turned sideways and frowned as she focused backwards. Natasha spun her around and put both hands on Darcy’s shoulders, steady, calming.

“You remember those pictures of Elizabeth Taylor? You said she looked beautiful.” Natasha smiled that half smile again, the satisfaction of an artist in her eyes. “You look better.”

* * *

Downstairs Pepper stared and shook her head. “Seriously? What about the ‘no uniform’ rule?”

“This isn’t a uniform.” Tony’s voice was the only part of him recognisable in the Tin Man lounging at the bar. The costume was almost perfect, from the funnel shaped hat and rounded torso with a row of rivets down the front to the silver feet. As he straightened and walked towards her, however, it was clear that it was derived from an Iron Man suit, and the face was not Tony’s but a facemask that resembled the face of the actor in _The Wizard of Oz_.

Pepper crossed her arms, raised her eyebrows and gave him a look. The silver figure shrugged. “Though I might use it in future. Has retro charm.”

“Does steam come out of the funnel?” Pepper pointed to the headpiece.

“It does now,” and Tony took Pepper’s hand and admired her. “Wow, Pepper. What are you, besides smoking hot?”

Pepper smiled at the compliment and narrowed her eyes at the attempt at distraction. Her green metallic dress ran straight up and down, with clever tailoring allowing her to move. The neckline was high and cap sleeves left her arms bare. Her hair was piled up into an unusual style, almost conical with a green point emerging from the top.

“You can’t guess?” she returned.

“Got me,” said Tony. “Maybe I should have been the Scarecrow.”

“Maybe you should,” said Pepper, and dropped the hand with a smile as she turned to welcome the latest arrivals.

The room was almost full when Natasha arrived, dressed in stylised traditional Russian clothing, her hair covered by a flower patterned headscarf. Pepper surveyed the round-necked blue blouse, the wide skirt that fell in a stylised bell shape and the white apron over it. As a light of recognition went on in her eyes, Natasha put her finger to her lips.

The Tin Man joined them, head shaking sorrowfully. “Nat, Nat, what the hell are you wearing? Why no slinky vampire, Nat?” She made a mock pout in reply. “I said no weapons but seriously, there better be weapons under there. Only acceptable reason.”  

“Darcy is working up courage to come in,” Natasha remarked, ignoring him. “Here they come now.”

Through the door came the black cat, marching regally.   Around his neck was a wide Egyptian collar, golden with red and green enamel insets, and a golden scarab hanging at his chest. Behind him came another golden figure. Natasha has straightened Darcy's hair and over it sat a headdress of golden beads. The dress of pleated golden fabric covered her cleavage but clung tightly to Darcy’s breasts before skimming over her curves. A golden belt emphasised her waist and a blue-green collar necklace matched her heavy eye-makeup. The regal clothes and makeup didn’t hide the anxiety in her eyes.

“Psst,” and her head turned to see Clint. DC turned with dignity and walked towards him. “You look great Darcy. How about some Dutch courage?” She took his arm with relief and headed towards the bar.

Behind them, the Tin Man hadn’t moved. Pepper coughed, with an amused glance at Natasha. “Well, I’d better circulate.” She nudged Tony as she went past. Tony stopped staring and turned to Natasha. “All is forgiven,” he announced before moving off.

At the bar Clint ordered two scotches and a tumbler of water. When the water arrived in a jug, Clint tutted. “Adding water to this, what do they think I am, an animal?” He took a sip and grinned. “So, how do you feel, Darcy?”

“Nervous as hell, “ Darcy confessed and took a gulp.

“That’s natural,” Clint said. He leaned in and spoke softly. “But you don’t look it. You look like a queen. Get out there and wow them.” He rubbed behind the ear of DC, who was delicately lapping the water in the jug. “I’ll keep an eye on DC for you.”

Darcy was about to answer when Jane appeared at her side. “Darcy, you look fantastic!” Jane was dressed in white Edwardian blouse, beige waistcoat, full skirt and lace-up boots.

“So do you,” Darcy said, leaning in for a hug. “Hey, we match. We’re from _The Mummy_.” She shaped her hands into zombie like claws.

 Jane looked slightly hunted. “I’m… no, I’m not an archaeologist.”

Darcy groaned. “Oh, Jane. Tell me you didn’t do a couples costume. You did, didn’t you? Tell me the worst. Who are you?”

“Jane,” said Jane. Behind her Natasha had appeared and was leaning against Clint, listening in.

“I meant…,” and Darcy stopped. “You’re _Jane_? You mean Thor is Tarzan?”

Jane nodded, a mixture of embarrassment, amusement and pride on her face.

“My actual god,” and Darcy was off her bar stool. “This I have _got_ to see.” The cat snorted into his water, and leaned into Clint’s stroking finger. The two spies watched Darcy go amid admiring stares from the other party-goers.

Clint grinned up at Natasha. “Successful op?”

Natasha shrugged one shoulder. Clint rolled his eyes and laughed.

Across the room Bruce Banner had arrived in a white coat. The Tin Man stood in front of him, arms crossed. “I said no uniforms, Bruce.”

Bruce ran a hand through his hair. “I told you, I’m a mad scientist.”

“That’s exactly the problem.”

Bruce drew his lips into a tight line. “I’ll just go, then.”

Tony grabbed him by the shoulder. “No, we can fix this. The costume works, it’s the name that needs work.” He drew Bruce across the room to the bar, throwing names as he went despite Bruce’s head-shakes. “Dr Watson? Dr Caligari? Dr Crippen? Dr Frankenstein?”

Tony nodded to the bar tender and deposited Bruce on a stool. “Have a drink and choose one. I’ll be back later to check on you.” Tony wandered off throwing one last name behind him. “How ‘bout Dr Jekyll?”

Bruce rubbed his face then met Clint’s amused stare.

“Need a drink, Doc?”

Bruce nodded back. “Tony can be a bit much sometimes.”

“Tell him you’re Doctor Who.”

Bruce took a sip of his apple juice. “I might just do that.” He looked Clint up and down. “Robin Hood?”

“Yip, same as always.”

Bruce turned to look at Natasha, then frowned. “Matryoshka doll?” His eyes met hers. “Do you have a lot of people inside you?”  

Natasha nodded. “You might say that. I’m impressed. You’re only the second person to recognise me.”

Bruce’s eyes went to the cat. Only Clint’s comforting hand on DC’s back was keeping him there.

“Ah.”

Natasha straightened up. “DC is Bastet, the Egyptian deity for warfare.” She pointed a finger into the crowd. “I’m just going to…” Clint waved her away with his glass.

Bruce met Clint’s eyes again. “I think I’d better…you know…the cat.” Clint nodded and Bruce vanished. Clint wasn’t surprised. The doc was insightful, and he had had a lot of practice in recognising fear.

Clint stroked the black back until the trembling stopped. “He’s a good guy, but you’re not the only one nervous around him.” Clint had felt Natasha tense at Banner’s arrival. “And as for the rest of us, we all have our demons.” Clint took another sip of scotch and closed his eyes, oblivious to the green gaze turned onto him.

Clint spoke again, eyes still closed, hand still stroking the cat. “I guess it’s just us guys propping up the bar, huh?”

“Room for one more?”

“I was including you,” and Clint’s eyes opened above a brilliant smile. “You got away.”

“Barely.” Phil Coulson lowered himself onto the bar stool, put the replica tommy gun on the counter and placed his fedora on top of it. “I dressed retro today, just in case I could.”

When Darcy came back to retrieve the cat, Coulson was rubbing him under the chin. “That’s a very unusual cat you have there,” Phil told her.

“Oh, I know,” and Darcy scooped the cat up and put him on her shoulder.

“Isn’t that dress from…,” Coulson started, as Darcy wandered back into the crowd.

Clint held up his hands. “Tasha’s op. Don’t ask.”

It was a fantastic party. Darcy didn’t know whether it was the dress or the people or Pepper’s perfect planning but it was the best time she had ever had. She said as much when Tony came up to talk.

“You win, kid.” Tony said. “DC definitely passes the ‘must wear a costume’ rule. Possibly more than Thor does.” Tarzan’s loincloth looked rather small on Thor’s bulk. “And talking of costumes, you look amazing. If I wasn’t madly in love with Pepper I’d sweep you away from all this.”

“Yeah, madly in love and my boss,” Darcy reminded him.

“Oh yeah, that too.” The silver face tilted. “Assume you don’t object to dating” and his arm swept the room, “in the wider SI slash Avengers slash SHIELD family?”

Darcy shrugged, smirking. “I don’t know. Sounds incestuous.”

“Eh, not so much. Just think there’s someone you ought to meet.” He span her around, and tapped the broad back that barred her way. Steve turned and looked from Darcy to Tony, then back to Darcy and stayed there.

“Thank me later, “said Tony, and vanished.

 The two stood in silence for a moment. Steve broke the ice.

“Hello beautiful,” he said, and put out a hand. Darcy opened her mouth then realised his eyes were on the cat. He gave DC a scratch behind the ears, then the blue gaze fell on her. “Hi Darcy”, and his smile held more than a hint of mischief.

Darcy grinned broadly. “People have the entirely wrong idea about you, you know that? Looking good, Mr Rogers.” He really was. Darcy was pretty sure knee-high socks on a man shouldn’t be sexy, but when they hugged calves like Steve’s and had a kilt swinging just above…well damn. It only got better – instead of a ruffled shirt, Steve wore something vaguely old-fashioned, but plain. Maybe it was Darcy’s fevered imagination but it was clinging in all the right places.

“You look like a movie star, Ms Lewis.” He stepped back to admire her, then his gaze met hers again. On Darcy’s shoulder, the cat shifted.

“All down to Natasha,” Darcy said, cheeks pink. Compliments flustered her a little.

“I doubt that very much,” and that hint of sass behind the boy-scout face was back. Darcy hit back.

“So, is the kilt…authentic?” The words were innocent, but there was an undercurrent of innuendo in her voice.

“Afraid not,” and Steve’s face was a picture of studied innocence. “Stewart, the guy said. There is a Rogers tartan but I don’t think it’s the same family as mine. Not as far as I know.”

“Yeah, there’s a Lewis tartan too, but definitely not the same family as mine.” Darcy’s voice grew a little lower. “But that’s not exactly what I meant.”

Steve's eyebrow went up. “Are you asking if I’m wearing the kilt in the authentic Scottish manner?” He paused, waiting for Darcy's nod. She found she was holding her breath for the answer. He leaned in, and his voice grew lower too. “I’m afraid not. With Clint and Tony around, if I did by the end of the evening everyone might know me…” and he paused, “a little too well.”  And that smile with the hint of sass was back.

The words tumbled out before Darcy could stop them. “Maybe some of us would like to know you a little too well.” Her cheekiness didn’t horrify him, as for a split second she had been afraid it would. Instead his cheeks became a little pink, and a sudden surprised smile crossed his face. But she could only enjoy it for a second, because suddenly Salem lashed out.

Steve jumped back before the claws reached him. Darcy’s head snapped around. “Salem!” But the cat was already in the air, firmly held in Thor’s hand, feet scrabbling too late to cling to Darcy’s dress.

“Thanks, Thor,” Darcy said, keeping her eyes firmly on his face. She refused to be like the guys who talked to her breasts instead of her, but Thor in a loincloth tested her to her limit.

“I think he is over-tired,” Thor said. “I shall return with him to my rooms. You stay, Darcy.” DC struggled in his hands, but was unable to escape.

“Thanks, big guy. Night, Salem, and be good,” and Darcy returned with a smile to her conversation. The cat stared balefully at Steve over Thor’s shoulder as Thor left.

“Hey Nat,” said Tony across the room. “What’s up?” They’d both watched the little drama unfold, and Natasha had a look on her face Tony had never seen before.

Natasha’s face smoothed out into neutrality. “I was surprised.” She cocked a brow at Tony. “It doesn’t happen often.”

The silver mask looked sideways at her. “Yeah, I’m sure it doesn’t.” He stood up and stretched. “Well, this face mask won’t come off, so I’m off to the work shop.”

“Come right back,” Pepper said, sailing up. “Guess my costume and there might be something in it for you,” she said, smiling up into the silver face.

“In that case I’ll hurry,” and the metallic figure vanished into the crowd.

Five minutes later the Tin Man appeared in the workshop. Tony took off the StarkGlass interface and got up to meet it. Multi-tasking at its best. He’d managed to keep Pepper happy and attend the party without having to stop work on the latest Iron Man suit. Idly, Tony wondered how hard it would be to insist meetings be held in costume, as he disassembled the suit and put it on. The head piece he put on the bench and as he did so a pencil rolled away. Tony’s eyes followed it as it rolled, green with a green lead emerging from reddish wood. A smile crossed his face as it hit the floor.

“Well, I’ll be damned!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Cat's Meow" - old slang, something splendid or stylish; similar to "bee's knees". 
> 
> Looks like an update every two weeks at this rate. Sorry guys.
> 
> On Tumblr, [inspirations for Darcy's Egyptian style (and DC's)](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/79644984027), a [Stick-Gods cartoon of Egyptian cat gods' one fatal weakness](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/79645302868/inonibird-stick-gods-catfight), a [Harry Potter gif-set on the Egyptian worship of cats. If DC hears Ron the fur will fly.](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/79645096740) Also [ a cat with a glass of water](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/79645465332/deducecanoe-i-am-so-glad-i-got-myself-a-glass) and [a cat at a bar](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/79645615347/no-need-to-wait-any-longer-the-latest-chapter-of). Enjoy!
> 
> Oh, and for the record:  
> Tony is the Tin Man, Pepper is a pencil, Darcy is Cleopatra, lokitty is Bastet the goddess of warfare, Steve is Bonny Prince Charlie, Thor and Jane are Tarzan and Jane, Natasha is a Russian Doll, Phil is a gangster and Clint is Robin Hood. AGAIN.


	8. Raining cats and dogs

Loki was irritated. It was galling that he had given way to the impulse to scratch the soldier’s fatuous face after months of seeking to appear innocuous. Thor’s air of patient understanding on the way back to his apartment only rubbed salt in the wound.

On their return, DC bounded from Thor’s arms and leaped straight into Thor’s chair. He wriggled out of the Egyptian collar, turned around and settled in comfortably. Thor stood and watched, arms crossed. When the cat was still and looking at him, Thor spoke.

“The Captain is a good man. I know your feelings for…”

DC narrowed his green eyes, then yawned elaborately, tongue arching like a snake. Thor sighed. “Very well. You do not wish to speak of this.” He waited. The cat met his eyes and deliberately yawned again. Thor sighed. “I wish you a good night.” The light went off and the cat was left to contemplate alone in the dark.

It was typical that Thor would assume that, because  _he_ was obsessed with a mortal female, all around should have similar obsessions. Typical too that it would not occur to him that a change in shape might alter more appetites than those for food. Loki would admit that, aesthetically speaking, seeing Her as a queen, uncertain yet regal, curves concealed yet highlighted, was not unpleasing. She was not unattractive, for a mortal.

Unsurprising then, that even a fool like the Captain should see it. More surprising that he would act, given his preference for hiding behind a shield. No sword for him; even his words were blunt. The Man of Iron had wit, the Widow insight, the Hawk heart, the Captain nothing but pious platitudes and smug self-righteousness in a tight suit. He deserved stripes to partner the star he wore but in truth, Loki should not sully this body’s claws. This was his last coherent thought as he drifted off to sleep.

He rebuffed all Thor’s attempts at talk the next morning, and when left on the common room floor, he stalked away, tail straight up, as if he had vastly more important things to do than Thor could even dream of. He did not see Thor’s smile as the elevator door closed.

His proud strut changed when he got into the room and saw Bruce Banner sitting reading at the table, tea at his side. DC immediately became a black shadow, skulking along the walls.

Clint watched the cat from his vantage point on top of the counter, amusement crinkling the corners of his eyes as the cat moved cautiously.The cat’s route was carefully chosen, keeping couches and chairs between him and the table where Bruce sat oblivious. Once DC reached the base of the cat playground, two graceful bounds saw him invisible inside a nook. Clint knocked back the rest of his orange juice, swung around to toss the bottle into the recycling chute then lightly leapt off the counter. “See ya, Doc,” he said loudly and was rewarded by a glint of green eyes over the edge of the nook. Clint tipped them a wink as he went out.

Bruce grunted without looking up.

There was silence in the room for fifteen minutes until Tony arrived in, mouth already running as he went straight for the coffee pot.

“…so I thought you could take a look.” He poured the coffee, took a long drag and sighed. “Life saver. So, how about it?”

Bruce stopped reading, looked up and turned. “Look at what?” Tony opened his mouth and Bruce struck his hand against his forehead at his own stupidity. “No. Just show me. I’m finished here anyway.”

Tony took some more gulps of coffee then got a refill. “Thanks, Big Guy.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be leaving today?” Bruce asked as he left his mug in the sink.

“Sure. California Dreaming, but doesn’t mean I can’t have a tech breakthrough first.”  Tony and Bruce left, Tony already starting to explain what he wanted Bruce to do. The sound of their voices faded down the hall and the cat cautiously raised his head and looked out.

Once he was sure the coast was clear he picked his way down the playground walkways, bounded across the floor and onto the counter. As usual, Clint had left the lid of his juice bottle there. One swipe of a paw and it was on the floor, rolling on one edge. DC leaped after it. In a distant corner a basket of cat toys lay neglected as battle between cat and juice cap commenced.

Half an hour, the lid lay defeated and the cat sprawled out on Thor’s favourite armchair, contemplating his options. His frustration was, he decided, understandable. He had waited long enough. He had surely by now allayed suspicion. Now was the time to resume his investigation of the building, to discover resources and escape routes.

He had surveyed two floors of offices, spaces full of empty wood-clad rooms and gleaming white facilities, when the cat decided it was mealtime. In the common room Darcy was already putting out his food, yawning widely. On weekdays, this was the time Darcy kicked Jane out to get lunch. On weekends it was the time Darcy tended to get up. He stood and watched her, making noises of complaint. She grinned down. "Starving, Salem?" She put down the bowl and watched him eat, a large mug of coffee in hand.

As they settled down on the couch, Darcy reading, DC curled up neatly beside her, head resting on her thigh. It was a strange small world that Odin had placed him in, as safe as one of Asgard’s cells, but infinitely more amusing. It was only a matter of time before he either found some escape from this place or Odin tired of the game. The cat closed his eyes and purring, slept.

Even waking to Steve Rogers face, arms folded along the couch back, head bent towards Darcy’s smiling face didn’t disturb DC’s calm. He merely stretched, rubbed his head against Darcy for a moment (earning him an “aw sweetums” and an attempted kiss that he swatted away), and walked with dignity towards the kitty playground where Clint hung upside down, watching the TV. Clint grinned as he saw the cat approach.  “Hey, wanna race? I could do with the distraction.”

It was infinitely more annoying to be awoken in the night by the same Captain Rogers pounding on Thor’s apartment door. Being bundled up with his basket and deposited in a sleepy Jane’s arms did nothing to soothe him.

The next morning the cat felt ill at ease. He woke in Jane’s apartment and paced until she got up and moved him to the common room. The gray day matched his mood. The TV was on but the channel had not been changed; two talking heads continued to speak seriously and incomprehensibly.  He ignored it, climbed to a nook and sulked.

His cautious optimism of yesterday had evaporated. It was the height of foolishness to be affected by such things as the absence of Thor, and the lack of Clint’s bottle-top on the counter. But in truth he had lived in a set routine for six months, and both Loki’s mind and the cat’s instincts were unsettled by a breaking of it they had not engineered themselves.

Jane and Darcy both arrived at noon. Darcy poured two coffees and launched into a conversation that had clearly just been broken off. “Seriously Jane. _Seriously_. You gotta close the lab. Look at this face, Jane. It’s my serious face telling you what you have got to do.”

Jane glanced across at the TV, still playing the Weather Channel. “It could still move away. I’m just saying we wait a while.”

She looked at Darcy who stood, arms folded, head cocked and a disbelieving expression on her face, and smiled weakly. “It might all blow over.”

“Blow over?” Darcy looked up and repeated herself, in case the ceiling hadn’t heard. “Blow over. It’s the freaking Frankenstorm, Jane. It’s not going to blow over.”

She paused, took a sip of coffee and contemplated. “The building might blow over. That’s the only blowing over that’s going to happen.” She looked sideways at Jane and adopted a wheedling tone.

“Look, we may not be able to do it later. Lines down, cells down. Human Resources have told us what we gotta do. Do it now.”

“But Thor…”

Underneath the wheeling tone was a note of steel. “ _Now_ , Jane.” Then softer, “We can always ring back if this all goes away, right?”

“Right,” grumbled Jane. Darcy put out DC’s dinner, and the two settled in to ring the lab staff.  The cat ignored food in favor of winding himself around Darcy’s legs. He needed company more than food just then.

After they left, he ate, then explored more offices until intense boredom drove him to search for Darcy. He found her in the main lobby, checking a clipboard while cradling her phone against her shoulder.

“Uh-huh. Yeah, Clint, that’s all we got. Uh-huh. Yeah, subways are closing. No, no sign of Steve.”

Outside the sky was dark and the rain determined. Instead of the earlier gray mist it fell heavily, bouncing off the ground. The cat watched as a spot of light grew improbably in the murk, until a bright patch of red and gold appeared. Iron Man strode towards the opening doors.

“Hey boss,” Darcy greeted him, clicking off the phone. “Aren’t you supposed to be in Malibu _not_ getting rained on?”

The face mask was shrugged off. “As if I’d miss this.” He nodded to the cat and started walking. “So, sweet-cheeks, bring me up to speed.”

* * *

It was early morning when the cat heard the murmuring of voices outside Jane’s apartment door. The second voice faded, then came a knock. Thor was restraining himself, but the door still shook. Two more and Jane was yawning her way to the door. When she saw who it was she pulled him in, kicked the door shut and pulled Thor into her arms. It was, thought the cat as he watched from his basket, probably the smoothest motion he had ever seen her make.

Thor’s face above her head relaxed. “I should not have woken you.”

Jane’s face, sleepy still, shone up into his. “Of course you should. Do you want some tea or…” She took his hand and led him to the couch. He collapsed gracelessly into it. The cat remembered times after battles, a lifetime ago. It was a long time since he had seen Thor so tired.

Thor put up an arm and pulled Jane onto his lap. He kissed her head and wrapped his arms around her. They fit together as if they were two parts of one whole.

They sat like that for a while in silence. The cat was almost asleep again when Thor spoke. “The storm will come. I could not stop it nor divert its course.”

Jane’s voice sounded as if she had been on the verge of sleep. “All you could do is try.”

Thor was silent a moment. “So said the Captain.” Another long pause then, “But I have never tried and failed before.”

Jane moved, moving to lean her head against his arm, hair falling back and glowing in the light of the single lamp. “Never?” She considered him, his eyes downcast. “Oh. What…how do you feel?”

Thor breathed in deep, then threw his head back. “I do not know.”

Jane put a hand up and toyed with a plait. “When I met them, the Warriors Three and Sif, they talked as if you all were always together.” She caught the glance Thor gave across the room, to the dark corner where the cat basket was.

So did Loki.

“Perhaps,” said Thor tentatively into Jane’s hair, “perhaps with them by my side things might have been different. The Warriors and…others.”

The cat suppressed a snort and listened. Thor kissed Jane’s head, and then her lips, as she threw her head back to meet his eyes.

“I do not know. I miss them, it is true. I miss their companionship, their council. But in my vanity, I thought that my arm was proof against any foe, that my might would always prevail. I was told I overreached, many times. But I did not believe it.”

“I guess…well, we all need help. We can’t do it all alone.”

“You are wise, Jane. I blame myself now for not valuing my comrades. It is a mistake I will not make again.”

Jane put her head to one side. “Steve didn't blame you. Did he?”

Thor smiled down at her. “For my failure? No. He was unsurprised, I believe, another sting to my vanity.” Thor’s grin widened, in amusement at himself, then he grew serious again. “He told me that there are things that none can do, and we must seek the wisdom to tell them from those which we can.”

Jane parsed this and smiled. The cat sensed a platitude and suppressed another snort. “Well, there are things we can do,” she said, playing with the plait again. “We’ve all spent the day here getting in supplies. We’re ready to help.”

Thor threw his head back again. “It is so silent, inside this Tower. Outside the wind is howling and the sea is high. Never have I seen such a storm. And tomorrow I shall join the Captain and defend the city against it.”

Jane cuddled into him. “Don’t go now. DC is asleep. Stay here tonight.”

He answered her smile and stood, lifting her as if she weighed nothing. They left and the room was silent.

The cat thought for a while on what he had heard until the ache in his head grew too much and he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience! I tried to research this, because I didn't know so much about the experience of Hurricane Sandy. That said, Lokitty is obviously out of the loop here. For another take see the lovely [Jekyll and Charlotte](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1288582/chapters/2671708) which is covering the same time period as this. 
> 
> This time on Tumblr for your kitten pleasure we have...
> 
> [Thor!dog and Loki!cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/82217092520/shinimiki-i-say-kneellllllllllllllllllll), a [cat avoiding a kiss](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/82217687832/kiss-me-you-fool-pass-it-on-to-the-first-ten-on-your) (anyone seen the one of the cat batting a kiss away?), [a series of pictures on the theme of Loki being a cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/82218022565/thorkizilla-chebits-pleatedjeans-cat), and [a cat looking out at the rain](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/82219355982).


	9. Cat 2

The ache in his head didn’t fade. Instead it grew, bringing with it a rising tide of dread. The cat hid, but even physical security did not bring peaceful sleep. He slept fitfully, his mind filling with images to match the rising panic in his stomach.

_ Alone in the dark, tiny in the large bed, knowing that the monsters were coming. The blue monsters with pointed teeth, wanting to freeze him and take him and eat him. Not waiting to cry out but wishing, wishing for his brother to come… _

Unfortunately when Thor finally came in real life, it didn’t help at all.

Thor was now in the hall outside the apartment. Darcy stood across from him, arms folded, with Bruce Banner by her side, dragged up from the common room. Outside the circle Clint leaned against the wall and listened in. The argument in the common room had been dull. He’d lay dollars to doughnuts this would be more interesting.

“Uh, okay,” Bruce began. “Darcy says there’s a problem with your cat.”

“Indeed,” said Thor. He turned to the door but Bruce forestalled him.

“I think it might be best if I, uh, don’t get too close. So what’s the problem?” He threw a sidelong glance at Darcy, arms still folded, lips still pursed. “I’ve no real expertise with cats so if you'd rather a veterinary…”

“In truth, I do not know what ails him. I found him this morning huddled under the further corner of the couch. When I moved it, he only sought sanctuary elsewhere. He resists any attempts to move him. He appears terrified but I know not why.”

“I knew a guy had a dog who did that,” Clint chipped in. “Lived in Florida, every time a hurricane came the dog went under the house and wouldn't come out.” He twirled a finger in the air, as illustration and reminder of the hurricane approaching outside. 

Thor turned to him, brow wrinkled. “But how, friend Clint? By what means could he know?”

"There are scientific theories." Bruce said. "There's nothing supernatural about it." Thor turned to him, face guarded as Bruce continued. “There’s been many documented cases that physical cues alert animals to events like storms and earthquakes. High pitched sounds, changes in pressure… As the hurricane gets closer the atmospheric pressure drops. Has he been rubbing his ears?”

Thor frowned a little, then nodded. “Yes, I believe he has.”

Bruce nodded back. “He’s more sensitive to the change in pressure than we are.”

“Than you are,” said Clint, “My knee is aching like a bitch.”

Bruce opened his mouth, then closed it and shrugged, took his glasses off and cleaned them on the corner of his shirt. “He’s clearly experienced drops in pressure before, and the effects of the storms that come after. It’s a learned behavior; he’s doing the best he can to remain safe.”

“So he’s hunkering down until the storm blows over.” Clint turned to Thor. “You get big storms in Asgard?”

“No,” Thor said, then paused and spoke awkwardly “No, but he came to me many years ago, from a harsh realm. I think there he would have know cold and storm.” There was silence for a moment, a silence that Natasha didn’t break as she slipped in behind Clint. Darcy rolled her eyes.

“So what should we do?” she asked.

Bruce shrugged and put his glasses back on. ”Nothing. If he was at risk he’d have to be moved but if he’s safe where he is leave him be. Once the storm passes over and the pressure rises, he’s be fine again. Be gentle with him. He’s afraid.”

“So no lifting furniture off of him, then. Got it.” Darcy turned a glare on Thor.

Bruce’s mouth twitched a little. "Ah. Yes, I would avoid that." 

Thor held up in hands in surrender. “I would fear meeting you in battle, Darcy. I admit, I acted wrongly, but with only good in mind.”

“You’re lucky you have me around to set you straight,” Darcy said, unfolding her arms. “Even if I have to go and get a fricking genius up here to convince you I'm right.”

“You’re welcome,” Bruce said gently, amusement radiating from him. A gentle cough came from behind Clint’s back.

“I thought you might want to know,” Natasha said. “They made a decision.” She ignored Clint’s sarcastic mime of applause. “We’re going to the shore. There's going to be a surge - we’re going to do what we can to defend the city against it.”

She turned her head and met Clint’s raised brows with a slight shake. He shrugged and turned to the others. “Well, you guys coming?”

“I’m going,” Bruce said. “Though I’m not sure how much use I’ll be.”

“Never shall it be said I refused a call to defend this city,” Thor boomed.

Clint suppressed a grin, then turned towards the apartment door. “Can I see the little guy?”

“Sure, I’ll show you,” said Darcy. She led Clint to a chair in the corner of the room. Lying sideways, Clint could just see a black shape tucked away at the back.

“Hang on in there, little guy,” he said, and was rewarded by the flash of a green eye. Straightening up, he was confronted with Jane in pyjamas. She waved away his words before he had a chance to say them.

“Since I met Thor nothing seems strange any more. So what’s happening?”

“Guys are off to Red Rock. Sandbagging.”

Jane looked at Darcy. “We should go.”

Natasha spoke from the door. “I know it is a lot to ask, but I would like one of you at least to stay here. We need someone to co-ordinate here."

Jane and Darcy looked at each other for a long moment. Then Darcy held up her hands. “Fine! You go. I’d like to keep an eye on Salem anyway.”

* * *

He was not fully aware of her presence as the roaring in his head grow louder. Dimly though his fear he heard her walk, heard her speaking on the phone, felt her sitting on the floor beside the chair crooning comforting words. The pain intensified, then slowly started to ease. As it did, the terror started to ebb away. Jane came home and he heard them eat, quietly discussing him and the storm. He drifted to sleep to the sound of their voices.

When he woke it was dark. Darcy was gone; he could sense it. And Thor was here. The loud whisper came, "Brother? How goes it?”

All he could feel was strange stupid relief, like he was a boy again. _Thor is here. Everything will be fine now._ The cat's first instinct was to rush out, leap up into Thor's arms and bury his face into Thor’s chest. For once, Loki did not curtail that instinct. 

Thor knew better than to say anything. His mind flew back to days past on Asgard, to a frightened little boy who steadfastly insisted he was not afraid and would push away sympathy. Instead he sat on the couch and gently stroked the cat’s back, enjoying the closeness. It was nothing that the cat did not show to others, but up to now, never to him.

He was dozing off when the cat moved, pushing forward on his paws, looking into his face. Thor sensed a question and answered it.

“Bruce Banner says that this is something a cat might learn, from experience of storms. It is something the like of which Clint Barton has seen before.” The cat waited. Thor sighed. “I do not know if this was a coincidence or an act of our father’s. If it was a deliberate act, it might have been done in love, to protect you. What of that?” Even in the dim light, Thor could clearly recognize the look on the cat’s face. Strange to see Loki’s familiar expression on such different features. _Must I be surrounded by imbeciles?_ “Be that as it may, I knew nothing of it. If I had known what ailed you, I would have let you be.”

The cat considered this, then started to set down his head, only to sniff, rear up and look accusingly at Thor again. Thor grinned a little. His brother was fastidious as ever. “I was deep in foul water. I showered many times yet the smell lingers.” The cat all but rolled his eyes, but settled down again. Ten minutes later both were asleep.

Jane woke at 5 am. Following the light she saw them, fast asleep, the cat curled up tightly in Thor’s embrace. She shook her head and smiled, covered Thor’s feet with a blanket, kissed his forehead and went back to bed without disturbing them.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At last! An update! It's going to be intermittent until September. Sorry. 
> 
> Short on cat pics but from Tumblr here's [Loki to Lokitty](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/89246038227/virushoney-i-have-avatar-set) and [Darcy Lewis, Pet Rescuer](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/89245722247/f-romanoff-13-agentdarcy-friendly-reminder). (She was PISSED at Thor.)


	10. Cat as Cat Can

Systematically the cat scratched the post, each claw digging deep into the rope wrapped around it. Now the roaring in his head was gone all he could feel was disgust. Cowering under furniture, clinging to Thor like a frightened child…all this was humiliating. All due, of course, to Odin’s perverse punishment, a punishment that attacked Loki at his heart, trying to undo what he was. He was not Thor, a victim of sentiment. He was self-sufficient. He needed nobody. The brute beast Odin had imprisoned him in had overwhelmed his true self once, but no more.

If fate had not conspired against Loki, Thor would now be well aware of this. But scarce two hours after Thor had entered Jane Foster’s apartment, there came a tap to the door. As suddenly as he had arrived Thor had left with the archer, leaving only a note behind. The look of fondness he directed at Loki as he left burned in retrospect. Fool! Did he still not realize that Loki cared nothing for him?

The mortal, at least, had some modicum of intelligence. Jane Foster had clearly noticed his rebuffs, and when she finally asked (in a properly subdued manner) if he wished to go to the common room, he had consented. Once there, he had stalked away from her without so much as a backward glance.

Unfortunately, the room was not amusing. Though the screen still showed images of destruction, the room felt as if it had been empty for hours. There was not so much as a juice top on the counter. The archer had clearly not returned…

But what of that? Before the storm Loki had started exploration of this building. Now would be the perfect time to continue.

* * *

“Sup?”, asked Darcy, leaning around Jane and looking into the apartment. “Guys out? Thor’s not in his apartment, I thought he’d be here.”

“Hey Darcy!” Jane was obviously flustered. “Thor was here, but he went back out. Look, I’ve got something to…”

Her words trailed off as Darcy, clearly not listening, wandered in around her, grabbed a mug and emptied the coffee pot. Jane didn’t protest. Something was definitely up. “No DC either? Wow, you guys are early.”

Jane’s hand moved as if brushing away an insect. “Yes, he was in a mood so I thought the common room would be better for him. He can get over his lost dignity there. Darcy…”

Darcy looked hard at Jane. “Jane, are you like, broody or something?”

The serious expression on Jane’s face shattered into shock. “What? No. NO. I’m not broody. Why would you think that?”

“You talk about the cat like he’s a kid. Come on, tell Darcy everything.” Darcy plopped down on the couch, coffee in hand and patted the seat beside her. Jane rolled her eyes, picked a paper off the table and joined her.

“I’ve been trying to tell you everything, but you keep interrupting. Read this.” Darcy took the piece of paper with a shrug and read.

“Dearest Jane, Much as it Pains Me, I must Leave without Seeing Your lovely face. I am Called away on a Quest to find the Captain. He has not Returned nor Yet Sent word to Us. I Trust We shall soon Find Him, Safe and Well. I Will Send Word to You, My Love. THOR”

Darcy collapsed against the couch back, coffee sloshing in the mug. She read the note again and looked up into Jane’s concerned face. “Oh. Shit.”

* * *

The office floors had changed. The warm wood floors and glass walls were as he remembered them, but the space was full of people. Mattresses covered each office floor. As he walked down the corridors he dodged feet; as he looked through doorways curious eyes stared back.

Loki suddenly felt deep curiosity. He had never mingled with so many Midgardians before - even from the Tower he merely saw the scurrying crowds below. Safely incognito, Loki walked and watched and listened.

* * *

“Thor will find him.” Darcy grinned at the absolute confidence in Jane’s voice. 

“And I have confidence that Steve will be fine. So we…” She paused as her phone rang, and dived into her bag to retrieve it. She looked at the number and grimaced. “I gotta take this.” Jane nodded sympathetically. Darcy shook herself, ruffled her hair and answered.

“Hey. Did you sleep? You know what they say, early to bed…yeah I guess you are.” Jane looked a question. Darcy waved her away. “Hey, don’t turn it back on me, I slept. Oh, okay, three hours. Yeah, yeah. So wassup? Ah-ha.” Darcy whipped out a tablet and started flicking, entirely focused. She spoke again into the phone tucked into her shoulder. “Yeah, came in this morning. The crew are set up to start at noon. I bet you say that to all the assistants. Talk later, bye.”

Amusement showed in Jane’s eyes. “Who was that, Darcy? What are you up to now?”

“That?” and Darcy tucked the brand new Starkpad into her bag. “Just Pepper checking in on some stuff.”

“Funny, would have though there’d only…” and then Jane’s mouth fell open. “As in CEO of Stark Industries Pepper? Our highest level boss when you trace all the way up the organizational charts? That Pepper?”

Darcy shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.”

“You can’t talk to Pepper Potts like that!”

“Sure I can. We spent most of yesterday talking. We’re practically besties.”

“You did? You are?” Jane tried to process this new information. “Talking about what?”

“Oh, you know, stuff we needed for storm relief, seeing the equipment that Tony wanted hooked up to the Arc Reactor arrived, that kind of thing. Organization stuff.”

Jane was processing what she had heard. “All night? You only got three hours sleep? Why didn’t you call me?”

Darcy shrugged. “Hey I know you guys got in at midnight, soaked to the bone. You needed sleep more than me.”

Jane crossed her arms again. “Well, I’ll help now.” A grin crossed her face. “Just don’t get us fired.”

“Anyone would think you had no faith in me,” Darcy observed, draining her mug.

* * *

It was strange, really, how infrequently Loki had mingled with the people of other realms. Apart from Asgard and Vanaheim, it was normally…now how had the Man of Iron put it, when arguing with the Captain? “Meet interesting people and kill them.”

Asgard was controlled, all knowing their place, moving in preordained orbits. Vanaheim was freer, but calm, like a wide river crossing a plain. In contrast with those Realms, these offices were chaos.

So many beings, so close together. Only at a feast would it be so in Asgard. Status, position - none was obvious to him as he walked the halls, listening to discussions filled with assumptions he did not share, disputes over trivialities quickly dispersed, friendly gossip that meant nothing to him. How could these people live like this?

In one office a TV screen showed Tony Stark talking. Apparently the Captain had been found, though injured. Loki could only hope it was nothing trivial. As the discussion moved on to New York resilience and Stark’s plan to reopen the New York Stock Exchange (whatever that was) Loki rolled his eyes. As Stark punched the air, behind the cat came a snort from a mortal, also watching. Their eyes met.

“Sure is some show that man puts on,” the mortal said. Loki felt an odd rush of fellowship before he turned away.

* * *

“Seriously, Salem? I don’t have time to track you down right now.” Not that it had been hard, once she thought to ask JARVIS.

Two reproachful stares greeted her. It had been a cute picture, the little girl dangling a ribbon and the cat leaping to bat at it with both paws. Now it looked like Darcy had a fight on her hands.

“He’s gonna stay with me,” the child declared. Salem, smug as the cat who got the cream, circled the girl's legs and looked up innocently. Darcy signed inwardly. He was being difficult today.

Darcy knelt down and met the girl eye to eye. “Hi, I’m Darcy. What’s your name?”

The girl considered Darcy briefly, then flashed a quick glance behind her. The woman a few feet away nodded. Mom, Darcy decided.

“Chella,” and then the words came in a rush. “Lala ran away ‘n’ he’s gonna stay til she finds me.” The little face crumpled and the voice became a wail. “She’s lost ‘n’ scared ‘n’ I miss her…”

Chella’s mom moved quickly to her side, and the girl turned into her. At her feet, Salem stared up, then leaned into the girl’s legs, and a small hand came down and touched his fur. Over Chella’s head, the adults’ eyes met.

“We’ll get Lala back honey,” and Darcy could see the other woman was not as confident as she sounded. “She couldn’t come here anyhow. No pets allowed here.”

“Chella,” Darcy said gently, and the little girl turned around. “Salem can’t stay here. Your mom’s right, he shouldn’t even be here.” She flicked a glance at the cat, who was clearly unconcerned.

“He’s doing no harm,” a old man butted in.

“And he’s Thor’s cat,” Darcy explained gently. “You know Thor.” All the heads in earshot nodded. She had an audience. Yikes. “Well, he’s here and he loves his cat.” She ignored the snort from ground level. “He loves him very much. He’d be sad if Salem didn’t come back, just like you’re sad about Lala.”

“I guess,” and on the last word Chella turned back into her mom’s arms.

“But, I bet he’d help look for Lala. Like, once all the people are safe. And I bet Tony Stark could set up somewhere for Lala to live, and for other lost pets too.”

“Really?” and the skepticism in Chella’s voice was echoed in the cat’s stare.

“She speaks the truth,” and all heads turned to Thor, who had arrived quietly on the floor while the attention was on Darcy. “The first time we met, a town was in peril, and Darcy Lewis’ first thought was to save every dog and cat that lived there.” His laugh was echoed by Chella, half out of her mother’s arms, hope on her face. Only the cat saw Darcy blush.

“Will you find Lala?” Chella asked, grinning broadly up at the blond giant.

Thor swept forward and dropped to one knee. “I will do all I can to find her,” he said. “But now I must take this miscreant away.” A swift movement and he was standing with the black cat in his arms. “He failed to return for food, so naturally I feared for him.” The crowd tittered gently at the indulgent tone in his voice. The cat looked unimpressed.

“Can Salem come back?”

“Let him,” said a voice in the crowd, and others murmured in assent.

Thor paused a moment. “He is a cat, and even a prince of Asgard has no control over a cat.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” shouted someone and laughter rippled across the floor.

“But if he wishes to, and if none have any objection, then it is well with me.”

Kneeling on the floor unnoticed, Darcy facepalmed. Chella’s mother caught the motion.

“This going to make trouble for you? We can look for Lala…”

“Oh, _that’s_ totally cool,” Darcy shrugged. “What’s the good of working for superheroes and billionaires if you can’t ask for a little something now and then?” The last words came with a grin. She stood up and spoke a little louder, “And now Thor’s promised, no way to stop him bringing his cat up here. _Supervised by him at all times_.”

She nudged the Crown Prince of Asgard with a finger. “Now come on big guy. You’ve disturbed these good people long enough.”

They parted at the elevator lobby, Darcy going down. As the door closed Thor could already hear Darcy on the phone, discussing animal shelters with Pepper. He grinned and looked down at the cat. “Made new friends, I see?” The cat continued to stare at the wall as if he had not spoken. Forewarned by Jane, Thor simply grinned wider, and said no more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that happened. Complete lack of writing time. I have now written this chapter and the next one. Will update each time how far ahead I am so at least you know the best/worst. But decks clear so on we go...
> 
> Oh, and the pet rescuing thing? [Ref to a cut scene from Thor](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/102286758377/that-darn-cat-new-chapter-is-up-with-a).


	11. A Cat May Look At A King

“Hey, Natasha, can I ask you something?” Two months ago Darcy wouldn’t have dreamed of buttonholing the spy like this. But that was before Halloween and the storm and Darcy somehow ending up running the building... The thing was, Natasha was calm and always knew what she was doing, and that’s exactly what Darcy needed right now.

Natasha studied her for a second (a second in which Darcy felt like a bug under a microscope), then smiled. “Of course, Darcy. What can I do for you?”

“You heard that Thor is bringing his cat up to the office floors to meet people?” A brief nod and Darcy plunged on, “Well…I guess it’s my fault because I suggested he do it, but I thought the cat being there on his own would be worse and people…” The nod was reassuring this time and Darcy relaxed. “But anyway…I assume SHIELD don’t want people to know about New Mexico?”

The only reaction was Natasha’s left eyebrow going up. Seriously, was there a SHIELD training course for that? Could Darcy get on it somehow?

“Yes, you could say that,” Natasha answered after a pause. “That could be a problem. You’ve been…dealing with it?”

Darcy nodded and met Natasha’s eyes. Natasha’s face remained almost expressionless, yet still managed to communicate _naturally you have_ with a side order of _we have to, don't we_. She suddenly wondered was this what Natasha did all the time in the Avengers.

Natasha paused a moment then nodded decisively. “We don't need to get SHIELD involved, we can deal with this inhouse.” She pressed the call button on the elevator, which pinged immediately. She ushered Darcy in ahead of her. Two floors up they got out, went down the hall and into a office. A chair turned and there was…

“Steve!” said Darcy, with enthusiasm, quickly followed by embarrassment. _Way to play it cool Darce_. But Natasha’s expression hadn’t changed and Steve, flatteringly, seemed as pleased as she was. Pleased, and, she couldn’t help noticing, partially covered with plaster.

“As you can see,” Natasha said, “Steve was injured when he went missing. It's nothing serious but we're going to have to put out a press release soon. But he’s healing fast. He should be able to go dancing in a few weeks.”

“Dancing?” both said at once, and stopped. Steve looked quizzically at Darcy. “Don’t you like dancing?” Head tilted with a blond lock of hair falling over his forehead, he looked good enough to eat.

Darcy realised she had sounded horrified. “Sure,” she said. “Thing is, you might have to wait a few years before I can dance like you’re used to.” Steve waited. “You know…” and Darcy’s hand mimed a swing.

Expressions flitted across Steve’s face, comprehension, nostalgia, then curiosity. “So, what are the dances like now?” he asked, and he smiled his lopsided smile at Darcy as she stood, open-mouthed, trying to work out how to describe it. “Show me.”

Darcy looked at Natasha for help. Natasha continued to look pleasant and neutral and entirely unaware of the appeal Darcy was making. Darcy gave in and moved to the middle of the floor. “How about I show you what not to do? Not like this…” and she did the stiffest moves she could think of. Steve’s hand went to his mouth as if considering but she saw the grin. Thanking the gods of humor, she moved on.

“And this is all wrong too.” Arms flailing, body moving with complete lack of coordination, it was a passable impression of her pop at a wedding. Even Natasha cracked a smile at the closing ridiculous bum wiggle.

“So I go for this,” and Darcy did a little boogie until the embarrassment got too intense. Looking up Natasha looked vaguely approving and Steve…he looked gorgeous and serious and those blue eyes looked more intense than before.

Steve broke the pause. “Well,” he said slowly, “We’ve got a serious problem. It’ll take a few years before I can dance like _that_ ” and the adorable crooked smile was back.

Darcy’s stomach did a flip, but before she could answer, Nastasha had stepped into the conversation. “As I was saying, Steve is out of commission, so he’s been taking on some desk duties for Pepper. Steve, Thor has been escorting his cat to the visitors’ floors on their request. Unfortunately he's been telling them a little too much.”

Steve nodded, clearly understanding the problem. Natasha continued. “My suggestion is that you take on the job of escort.”

Two disbelieving faces turned to her. “I don’t know that he gets on with Steve,” said Darcy at the precise same time as Steve saying, “Last time I saw him, he tried to scratch my eyes out.”

Natasha raised both eyebrows, as if astonished her infallibility should be questioned. “It’s the logical solution. This allows Thor to return to the front line relief effort. We need all the help we can get.” Darcy noticed Steve shift uncomfortably as Natasha ticked that point off on her fingers and went to the next.

“Darcy has taken on a huge responsibility, organizing here.” She waved a hand, dismissing Darcy’s attempt to protest. “Darcy, you should know we notice and appreciate that. Steve, this will lighten that burden to some degree. Thirdly, there’s the matter of your injury. We’ve held off the press until now but we’re fielding too many questions. This will show that, though you are injured, the damage is slight.”

Darcy’s mouth was open. She had had no idea Natasha knew so much. Even Darcy hadn’t known about the media pressures, since Pepper dealt with all that. She also felt elated. Natasha’s approval was better than a gold medal.

Natasha was leaning forward towards Steve, voice softer. “And you’re good with people, Steve. It will be mean a lot to them to see you. They like you.”

“The cat doesn’t,” Steve pointed out.

“Are you saying you can’t handle a cat?” and Natasha’s voice had a definite undercurrent of surprise. Steve flushed a little.

“No, I’m not saying that. I’ll give it a try.”

“Good. I have another suggestion. At the moment Pepper is coordinating with you both separately. It's inefficient and since you're working together on this matter, I suggest you join forces concerning the Tower work generally. What do you think?" 

“Sure!” both said at once, then paused to let the other speak again. Natasha got there first. “No arguments about that? Excellent.” She spoke drily but the corner of her mouth quirked up.

Meeting over, Natasha and Darcy returned to the lobby. “I could have asked Jane,” Darcy said tentatively, as they walked.

Natasha nodded. “Of course. But this will be good for Steve.”

“So, I’m guessing the kvetch level is high right about now?” Darcy said conversationally as Natasha scanned her hand to call the elevator.

“Why would you think that?” asked Natasha, also in the same conversational tone.

“Oh, Steve told Tony he isn’t a team player a few times. Steve goes off his own now, gets injured - bet Tony can’t let it go.”

Natasha glanced up as if considering then met Darcy’s eyes. “There just might be something in what you say,” she said, but the tone said that Darcy was totally in the ball park.

“He’s guilty about it, isn’t he? Steve, I mean.”

Natasha shrugged. “A little. He’ll survive.” The elevator doors opened. “Thank you for coming to me Darcy. I appreciate it.”

Darcy grinned. “Jeeze! No! Thank you! I was so worried, you have no idea.”

Thoughtfully Natasha watched the elevator doors close, then returned to the office. Steve was waiting, arms crossed.

“I don’t need your help”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Natasha said. She did not bother to inject confusion into her voice.

“With Darcy. I don’t need your help.”

“I didn’t offer it,” and Natasha's expressionless face still managed to radiate deep amusement. “You two seemed to be doing perfectly well on your own.”

* * *

Loki took better to the new arrangement that anyone might have expected. In truth visiting the mortals with Thor was a strain. The storm had, in Thor’s eyes, erased the distance between them, despite Loki avoiding his...the Prince as much as possible. Even worse, after the visits Thor would talk to the cat. Loki would never have guessed there could be something more dull than Thor’s war stories but there was: syrupy sermonizing that Loki could sit through only by ignoring it completely.

The Midgardians were always fascinating, but around Thor they were restrained. It was something Loki had never reflected on before, but Thor was clearly different. Alien, in fact. He was a rock thrown into the stream of their lives, diverting them from their natural course.

From the time of the first formal, slightly stiff handover of the cat from Darcy to the Captain to the delivery of the cat back to the common room, the difference visiting with the Captain was marked. He did not intrude. Once the first shock of standing face to face with Captain America passed, the mortals seemed to get used to him, to see him as one of their own. Not an equal precisely, but in the same way the court regarded Odin, or the warriors of Asgard Thor. 

It had to be admitted that this resemblance did not make Loki any fonder of the mortal. The Captain was still a dolt. Loki was still of the opinion that his righteousness was a product of lack of imagination and his powers, like Thor’s, were not something struggled for but gifted to him without the slightest effort on his part. 

Still, Loki could look back and find it incomprehensible that the man could have mattered enough to unsheath a claw for. The only explanation was that the storm was affecting him even then.

That was what he told himself at least, as he wandered among the mortals, fascinated, attempting the odd experiment. A sudden dart brought him directly under a foot. The woman stumbled and would have fallen if the Captain had not stepped in. 

“Damn-fool cat!”

“Sorry about that, ma’am.” 

The woman flushed. To Loki's eye she did not look unhappy at her close proximity to the Captain. “Oh, ain’t no trouble. I damn near stood on him.”

So, no harm done. New tricks in his arsenal might prove useful.

* * *

Over the coming weeks, just as the living arrangements became routine, it all started to change. The people left, to their homes or temporary accommodation or relations. Chella was one of the last to go, and she stood bouncing on her toes in the atrium, small bag on her back,  looking forward to collecting Lala from the pet shelter. Thor had kept his promise.

Darcy and Salem had come to say goodbye.

“Be good,” Chella said to Salem, stroking his head as he lounged in Darcy’s arms. “He’s a bad cat sometimes but he loves you lots,” she continued to Darcy.

“I know,” Darcy grinned back.

They watched as Chella and her mother walked out of the building. Darcy snuggled her face towards Salem’s. “Who wuvs Darcy? You wuvs Darcy!” The cat gave her a look, but then snuggled more deeply into her arms.

The phone beeped on Darcy’s hip. She straighten up, checked it and sighed. “Just one more stop, Salem, okay?”

Outside the canteen Darcy put Salem down and fixed him with a glare. “Stay here, got that?” The cat sat down, yawned elaborately and started licking a paw. Darcy grinned and headed into the kitchens.  

It amused him to watch her organising all about her. It reminded him strangely of his childhood, bringing back half forgotten memories of sitting in the lap of a handmaiden while Frigga arranged and directed, and then turned and took him back in her arms with a smile.

Two minutes later Darcy was on her way out when she heard a call behind her. “MISS LEWIS! MISS LEWIS!”

Darcy knew who it was before even looking. She pinned on a smile and turned to the old lady hobbling towards her. “Hey Mrs. Greenbaum. How’s the knee?”

“Oh, it’s not so bad. They say I can go home now.”

“Oh, well that’s good news.”

“Is it?” Mrs Greenbaum seemed ready to explain all the reasons that it wasn’t, but stopped herself. “But I just wanted to say to you, Miss Lewis, that your parents should be proud.”

Darcy had had many people thank her as they went on their way, but this was entirely unexpected. Her mouth dropped open and she was lost for words. Mrs Greenbaum carried on.

“All this work you’ve been doing - I noticed.” She took Darcy’s hand and patted it. “You’re a good girl.”

Darcy collected herself. “Thank you,” she said. “It’s really nice of you to say so, but it’s not just me, but Steve and Pepper and Tony…”

She was interrupted by a snort. “Mr Rogers is a nice boy, even if that silly suit of his is too tight. I saw him on TV and didn't know where to look. And I suppose this Pepper person is helping if you say so, but Tony Stark? Don’t talk to me about Tony Stark.”

Darcy could see she wasn’t going to get the chance to talk about Tony Stark. Mrs Greenbaum was in full flow.

“…and at least he’s settled down, not having all those wild parties and such. Not that the papers _know_ about, at least. But still, he’s no-good. I met his mother once, you know. Now SHE was a lady. She did a lot for this city. What’s Tony Stark ever done for this town before?”

Darcy’s head filled up with all the things that Tony Stark had done, but for the life of her she couldn’t think of one that she wouldn’t get arrested as a matter of national security if she told it.

“That Expo in Queens? Lucky everyone there wasn't killed. Tried to shift the blame but everyone knows those were his machines. And there he is now, sitting up in his Tower, looking down on little people as if nothing ever happened…that’s not how Maria Stark raised him, I can tell you that.”

“But he’s done a lot. He brought power back to the city. He’s starting up a new animal charity under the Maria Stark Foundation,” Darcy said, grabbing the chance to speak. Typically enough Tony had laughed at the idea of shelter for animals affected by the storm, only to arrange a huge budget, fly in expert help and finally decide to make it a permanent initiative.

“Animals!” said Mrs Greenbaum, and sniffed. She took in a deep breath, but Darcy had grabbed her chance again.

“Ah, I’m sorry, I gotta go. Something I forgot in the kitchens. You know how it is. Thank you for, ah, saying the nice things…” and Darcy turned and half ran towards the kitchen doors.

The cat had started towards Darcy when she had first left the kitchens. He had seen and heard it all. Unlike the old lady, now hobbling away towards the lobby, he saw Darcy’s shoulders shake as she got closer to the doors. Thoughts of revenge against the old harridan who had made Darcy cry skittered around his head.

As Darcy came close to the doors, Steve came out of the kitchens. His smile for Darcy turned into a look of concern. “Darcy, are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Darcy choked out. Steve looked at her thoughtfully and drew her away from the kitchen doors, down a corridor. The cat followed, his thoughts of bloody vengeance now also featuring the cursed Captain.

The Captain stopped, turned Darcy around to face him and put his hands on her shoulders. “Let it out,” he said gently. The skittering in the cat’s mind stopped as he could see she was not crying, but…laughing?

“Holy shit,” and Darcy was shaking her head and breathing deep. “Holy shit, I had to get away from her. One more second and I’d have laughed in her face!” Steve nodded and waited as Darcy calmed down.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he said at last.

“I don’t know. I guess,” and then Darcy paused, put her hand on Steve’s chest and looked into his eyes. “Thank you.”

“My pleasure,” Steve returned, and the two of them stood for a moment, just looking at each other. Like rats in a basement, the skittering thoughts returned to the cat’s head.

Darcy started to talk, slowly at first. “It was Mrs Greenbaum, you know? She came up and thanked me for the work I did. And I said it wasn’t just me but you and Pepper and Tony. And she said you were a nice boy…”

“Really,” said Steve dryly. He had handled complaints from Mrs Greenbaum before. Darcy cracked a smile.

“Yeah, shocking. And she was a bit sniffy about Pepper, but Tony…she really doesn’t approve of Tony.”

“She really doesn’t approve of anyone, Darcy.”

“Yeah but…she was saying how he just sat in his Tower looking down on everyone…and how he didn’t help anyone…and all I could think of was six months ago.”

Steve’s face suddenly became calm, official. He looked around cautiously, and drew Darcy further down the corridor. . The cat drew closer, curious to hear

“You mean Stuttgart?”

Darcy was too emotional to realise she was saying too much. The cat knew immediately what was coming, but he did not expect the undercurrent of horror in her eyes as she said it.

“Not Stuttgart, here. What Tony did when the alien invasion almost happened. I so wanted to tell her Tony Stark and the Avengers stopped an actual alien invasion. And then I pictured her face if I told her and I just lost it.”

Steve still had his official face on. “You shouldn’t know any of that.”

Darcy's face fell. "Oh shit. I'm sorry. I don't know really, it's just stuff I pieced together. And I signed non-disclosure so I wouldn't say anything. Anyways, that’s why I almost laughed in her face. Wouldn’t it be better in a way if people like her knew?”

Steve shook his head slowly. “We can talk about what you know later. But people knowing what bad things didn't happen, no, I don’t think so.” He paused to gather his thoughts, his face losing the official edge, becoming more thoughtful. “I’m glad they don’t know. I wish no-one knew about war and suffering.”

He looked down at Darcy and shrugged. “I’ve seen too much war. I don’t want to see any more, but I will if it means others don’t have to. If the price of that is to be misunderstood, so be it.” He gestured back down the corridor, to where the myriad New Yorkers sat eating together. “This town has seen enough war too. I want…I guess I want everyone to feel secure in their beds at night, walking down the street. I know it's not like that but want to make it happen.” He looked away and Darcy tilted her head to look quizzically into his eyes. He shrugged again.

“I guess…I was going to tell you. I’ve decided to join SHIELD officially. I don’t know if it makes a difference to…us…”

Darcy was shaking her head. “As if,” she said, and bumped her shoulder into his arm. “You’re right, people shouldn’t know. You’re a good man, Steve Rogers. And I’m a horrible person.”

His smile was wide and surprised and genuine. “No. You’re not. You’re a good woman, Darcy Lewis.”

“Ah shucks,” Darcy said, relief only partially concealed by wide-eyed fake modesty.

To the cat watching, they suddenly formed a picture he recognised. These two would be the king and queen of New York if a place so chaotic could have such a thing. There was no reason that that thought should make him feel desolate, yet it did. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, guys. This story is moving a little slowly, but can't seem to speed it up! So been rewriting this chapter and the next. Decided just to put them up and hope for the best! Next will be up later today. Hope you like.


	12. Peeping Tom

The dark mood that had gripped him did not lift in Darcy’s apartment. It did not fade as she cradled him and kissed his fur. His body was warm against hers, yet he felt cold.

“Look after him,” Darcy said, when returning the cat to Thor. “He seems a little off.” One last kiss and she was gone.

Thor brought him in, sat down and started to talk, as usual. Loki withdrew his attention as usual, but found his thoughts returning to the same few images.

_ The king and queen of New York. _

_ The horror in Darcy’s eyes. _

He needed a distraction, any distraction. It was a measure of Loki’s desperation that even listening to Thor was better than his thoughts.

“…and I said, nay, you are due thanks for befriending with my cat. She giggled but she does not know all, my brother, does she?”

Ah, so Thor spoke of Chella. Loki was glad he did not have to hear of the rescue of Lala again. Thor was smiling, nostalgia playing over his face...so he would next speak of Asgard. So predictable. 

“It is easy to imagine her playing with Volstagg’s brood, eh? She and Hildy would be a force to be reckoned with!” Thor’s eyes came back from Asgard and focused on the cat. “It’s clear to us, is it not brother, that we and the Midgardians are not so unalike?”

The realization struck Loki like a blow. He suddenly saw the snare that Odin had prepared for him and the delusion Thor was pushing him towards. He had almost fallen, but he saw the trap just in time.

Why had Odin sent him to this accursed planet? To learn the lessons he had first wished to teach Thor: a measure of humility, the virtues of self sacrifice, a duty towards lesser races. What had Thor learned? It was amusing really - did Odin know how his lesson was subverted? Not merely duty but friendship with these mortals, appreciation of their small lives, belief in their equality even. Nonsense, all of it, Odin’s lesson and Thor’s fantasy both. Loki would not be bent. Loki would remain Loki.

His previous inattention had been read by Thor as assent, his disregard of Thor’s touch as acceptance. It was laughable. Even more amusing, Loki’s inattention now would be read the same way, while in truth it allowed Loki to analyze Thor’s delusion more deeply and reject it completely.

There was nothing, nothing here to convince Loki that these mortals were his equals. They were entertaining, to be sure, but was a cat not entertaining to mortals? Yet how much did they care for the preservation of a cat? 

Niggling exceptions came to mind but he pushed them away. He refused to submit to Odin and Thor. He rejected the desolation he had been tricked into. He would embrace being alone.

He scarcely felt Thor stroking his fur, and heard his words not at all. 

“I am glad that you are listening, my brother.”

* * *

“So, what does your girlfriend know?”

Steve suppressed a sigh. Tony had been more obnoxious than usual since rescuing the injured Steve after the storm. No-one would ever have believed it possible, but there it was.

“She is not my girlfriend.”

“You haven’t sealed the deal?” Tony’s eyebrows practically vanished into his hairline. “All that time working in close proximity?” The last two words dripped innuendo. “You might have got away with decade long…”

Natasha gave that subtle _hem_ noise which still managed to shut everyone else up. “If we return to the topic at hand…what exactly has Darcy pieced together?”

Steve leaned back. “Not much. She already knew that something major, probably involving Thor, happened last May. Jane being rushed away would tell her that. She knows that this Tower was infiltrated, that something similar to Jane’s equipment was here with the aim of allowing aliens invade Earth. She knows that Tony shut down the infiltration, but no details. She knows nothing about the Tesseract or the helicarrier.” He met Natasha’s look. “I was careful.”

Tony smiled his most cocky smile. “So she knows I’m a hero, huh? Good to know. So how did she hear all this? Pillow talk?”

“Now just you wait a minute…” and Steve was standing up, fists clenched. Nastasha stood up too.

“Tony, knock it off. Steve, sit down.” She waited, arms crossed, until both were sitting calmly. Then she spoke.

“Thank you Steve. Does she know about this meeting?”

Steve nodded curtly. Natasha could see he was still riled.

“Good. I’ll talk to her and pass this back to Coulson. Tony, if there’s an security issue you should know about I’ll get back to you. Steve, as team leader it’s probably best to let everyone know. Just in case.”

Tony leaned back, arms behind his head. “If you ask me, you should give Darcy the whole story. I don’t mind her hero worshipping me. Not. One. Bit.” He pursed his lips and wolf-whistled while Steve gritted his teeth.

Steve clearly didn’t realize, Natasha thought as she broke up the meeting, that Tony was doing this to deflect attention. Tony had tensed up as soon as the Tower infiltration was mentioned.

 

* * *

 

 

Loki was resolved - he would resist being molded. The next day he hid when Darcy came to bring him to the visitors. A slit in the fabric underneath a couch allowed him to hide inside, invisible to any looking underneath. He waited until her voice faded, the door closed and the room had been silent for ten minutes. When he emerged, however, somebody was still there.

Crosslegged on the counter sat the archer, faint amusement on his face. They stared at each other for a moment. Clint broke the silence.

  
“Race?”

* * *

“Am I in trouble?” Darcy sat directly across from Natasha. Her tone was direct. Natasha approved. The extra work Darcy had taken on had suited her. She had grown.

“No,” Natasha said. “If we didn’t trust you, you would never have had the responsibility you had over the last month. We just needed to know how much you knew and where it came from.”

“I don’t want Erik to get in trouble.” Concern seeped into Darcy’s voice now. Natasha could understand that. She could even empathize.

“He won’t,” Natasha said. “He is not to blame for having an intelligent co-worker.” She smiled inwardly at Darcy’s doubletake. It was rather charming that praise still surprised her. Natasha waited a moment. “We’re happy neither he nor you is a security risk. Do you have any other questions?”

Darcy shook her head.

“Then someone else would like to speak to you.” Natasha slipped from behind the table and left the room.

Steve came in. He sat down and they sat in silence for a minute.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Sure,” Darcy shrugged. “It’s Natasha. It was fine.”

Steve reflected for a moment how many now imprisoned would disagree with that assessment. “You understand that I had to tell them?”

“Yes, I get that.” Darcy took in his rueful look and smiled. “Don’t look so down. Natasha hardly beat me up at all!”

His concern was shattered by a grin. “In that case, how about I console you with dinner?”

Darcy put her head to one side and considered him. “Is this a date, Mr Rogers?”

“If you want it to be, Ms Lewis.”

* * *

Clint returned to the common room to find Darcy once again looking for the cat. She straightened up, shrugged at him and looked up to the ceiling. As if knowing he was appealed to JARVIS replied. “The tracker cannot pinpoint DC more precisely, Ms Lewis, and this room has no visual surveillance.”

Clint grinned. “I know where he was when I left.” Crossing to the wall, he scaled it quickly, dived a hand into the cubbyhole and lifted out a sleeping cat, legs dangling like a kittens from his mother’s mouth. “I think I tired him out.”

“So that’s where he was the whole time?” Darcy asked, exasperated.

Clint crossed the room and deposited the cat in her arms. “Don’t think so,” he said diplomatically. The cat shifted and settled in the crook of Darcy's arm. “He looks comfortable,” Clint added and grinned.

“Yeah, yeah,” Darcy returned. “So what’s up now the relief work is over?”

Clint shrugged. “Looks like I’m back in the field any day now.”

His voice was casual but Darcy could sense the relief in it. She nodded slowly. “Cool.” Her smile said the rest.

Clint opened the door and as she walked out the cat turned in her arms, fur caressing her forearms before he settled again, belly in the air, head sideways pillowed on her chest. “Aw baby,” and Darcy headed for the elevator, trying to ignore the bag strap that had slipped down her arm and threatened to dislocate her elbow. By the time she made her apartment there was a puddle of cat drool on her boob.

* * *

The cat only awoke when he was deposited gently on the bed. He opened one eye, to see Darcy’s bedroom. He could hear her moving around out of his eyeline. Then she crossed to the door, and he realized she had put her shirt into the hamper.

His first instinct was to look away. Darcy was never shy before him, and it would be strange if she were, given she thought him a brute beast. But in Asgard, though display of the body was no shame, seeking out by force or by deceit what was concealed from you was disgraceful. Spying on others to see them naked would be  contemptible , the act of a vile coward. 

If an Asgardian, unaware of his presence, stripped before him, Loki would look away. That respect was due. But was it due to one from Midgard?

The point might be stretched for the Avengers, since they were exceptional, heroes and warriors all. The same might be said for Jane, but for different reasons: her intellect and insight would equal any Healer. Was Darcy exceptional? He instinctively said yes, but he could not justify it. She might be the best of Midgardians, but surely nothing more. She was human, not superhuman. By all that was logical and rational the rules of Asgardian courtesy should not apply to her. Yet his eyes remained stubbornly turned away as Darcy left the room.

He sat puzzling over this strange reluctance until a thought arrived unbidden. _What an affront to the Captain it would be to do this._ He examined this thought from all sides, as a cat playing with a mouse. If he were the Captain he would be furious at such a transgression. Of course, the Captain would never know but the thought of the anger he would feel if he did was sweet. And she was, after all, merely a Midgardian...and had he not seen her worth before the Captain ever thought to? 

These thoughts propelled him from the bed and out the door. The bathroom door was ajar. He stalked towards it, and silently nudged it open.

She was merely a mortal, but by the Nine, she was beautiful. Darcy’s bra was draped over the towel rail as she stood at the sink, her hands under the water. She splashed the water on her neck and cleavage, the rivulets running down her breasts. He had only thought to look and leave, but he found he could not look away.

Then as if she sensed his presence, she turned and smiled to see him, leaning against the door frame.

“Hey sleepy! Just cleaning off your drool. Do you know you drool a lot when you sleep? Because you do.”

As beautiful as she had seemed before, as she spoke to him with fond amusement in her voice, she seemed even more beautiful than before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is being worked on - "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof"


	13. Cat on a Hot Tin Roof

This was, without doubt, the most ill-named holiday Loki had ever come across. Trapped in the Tower watching Thor, Jane and his remaining companions eat to excess was not, in Loki’s opinion, anything to thankful for. Quite the reverse in fact.

The Man of Iron had been whisked away by his Lady, or so Loki gathered, to the “West Coast”. The Doctor had gone to family, and so had Darcy. He did not miss her, because that would be ridiculous. He was accustomed to her and that was all.

So he sat, watching the Captain and Thor exchange stories, Jane tucked into Thor’s side, the Widow and the Archer listening across the table. The feasting went on for ever, with its sole redeeming feature the white meat the Archer fed him under the table.

Even more oddly, the next day was “Black Friday”, a name fit for mourning and calamity, but that for some reason required everyone in the Tower to go out. Wandering the deserted office floors alone, the cat made a discovery. In one office the grill over the air conditioning had been loosened, and the damage hidden behind a pot plant. The cat could just squeeze through. This was at last something to be thankful for - a chance to move around the building without being seen.

* * *

Though the mysteries of travel outside the Tower, both Darcy and the Doctor arrived back in the common room at the same time that Sunday. Loki did not rush over from where he was lounging with the Archer, naturally. He simply rose and wandered over to where Darcy leaned across the counter, watching the Doctor making tea. He twined around her legs, luxuriating in her presence.

“Somebody missed you,” Clint remarked from across the room.

“Somebody missed him too,” Darcy returned, looking down at the cat rubbing his body against her legs. She picked him up and kissed him on the nose. “Aw, sweetie, I love you too.”

“Rubbing against you isn’t a sign of affection,” said Bruce, as he put a mug of coffee in front of Darcy. He sipped his tea and went on. “It’s a way of marking ownership. He thinks he owns you.”

“Doc, there’s such as thing as too much science,” said Clint at the exact same time as Darcy said, “For real?” with a skeptical look on her face.

The cat stared at the Doctor, struck by his words. This time, this feline body and Loki’s mind were in perfect harmony. The instinctive feline action reflected his feelings: he did not miss her or want her, but she was his.

* * *

Pepper looked out of her office window sightlessly. Her mind was running back over the conversation that morning.

Tony, his mind already in New York. “I have to go back, Pepper.” Nothing she would say would make him stay one more day. Nothing would make him explain why.

He had been relaxed when he first arrived at the Malibu house. It didn’t last through to Thanksgiving dinner. By this morning, he was roaming the place, unable to settle, like a cat on a hot tin roof.

 _I have to go back_. But why? He wouldn’t talk about it. What should she do?

When her mobile rang she sighed with mingled frustration and relief. Curiosity only kicked in when she saw who it was.

“Darcy? Is everything okay?”

“Can you talk? Am I disturbing you?”

Pepper swung on her chair to look back out the window again, at the fabulous sprawl of LA, gilded by sunlight, veiled in the distance by smog. “Quite the opposite. Go ahead.”

She heard Darcy sigh down the phone. “I have a problem. And it’s lame and silly but Natasha’s away and Jane can’t help.”

“I’m intrigued,” said Pepper, smiling. “Want do you want? Experimental tech, another charity foundation, stock tips?“

“Fashion advice.”

Pepper took the phone from her cheek, moved it away and laughed hard. Then she put the phone back. Darcy sighed again.

“Now you have that out, can you help? Steve is bringing me to a fancy restaurant and I have NO idea what to wear, except that what I usually wear is totally not going to work.”

Pepper smiled. “I’m sorry, Darcy, it was just so unexpected.” She thought rapidly and nodded. “If I could I’d fly over, but here’s the next best thing. I’ll send you a name - he’s a genius. Tell him where you’re going and he’ll do the rest.”

“For real?” Darcy’s voice was thrilled, then guarded. “What kind of budget does he work to?”

“I’ll look after it,” and Pepper held the phone away as loud spluttering came down the line. “I want to,” she said loudly. “I’ve felt like the evil stepmother giving you work and more work. Let me send you to the ball.”

“It’s too much…”

“No it isn’t. Really Darcy, let me do this.”

It took all Pepper’s powers of persuasion but she closed the deal. If only Tony was as straightforward.

* * *

Darcy had missed “her cat” and was perfectly happy to tell him so. He spent every evening that week, Monday to Friday, in her apartment and he had come to a realization.

She did not change her clothes often enough.

He could not stop thinking about her body. He craved the sight of her, but somehow the sight fed the need rather than satisfied it. The hollow ache spoke of something missing, but he could not identify what.

His mother had often said that he was not self-aware enough. He had laughed at her, because that was the one trait he did have. How often had he sat alone, hurts and slights running through his thoughts in painful detail? Now he wondered if he had misunderstood what Frigga had meant.

This truly disturbed him. Darcy could not be the source of this growing obsession, so what was? He could not tell.

These thoughts occupied him Saturday, as he sat between Jane and Thor as they watched some inane entertainment or other. He scarcely noticed the tapping on the door, or how Jane and Thor exchanged glances. Thor sprawled out on the couch and watched Jane go to the door, while reaching out to stroke the cat’s back.

The cat’s reverie was shattered by Darcy entering the room. She spoke to Jane, apparently seeking some reassurance or other, but he was utterly distracted by the sight of her.

Darcy stood, a little shy it seemed, in a simple dress of wrapped silk. The deep green silk wove around her, caressing her curves like a promise. In this color - his color - her eyes were blue-green like warm seas, and her hair was darkest brown. Loki was transfixed at what the Fates had done, how Chance itself marked her his. He started to move, fixated on going to her, but found Thor’s stroking hand had him held fast.

“You look amazing,” said Jane, sincerity ringing in her voice, without a hint of shadow since she could know nothing of the effect on Loki.

“Truly beautiful,” said Thor, apparently as sincere and unaware as Jane. The cat turned as best he could and studied Thor’s face. Either Thor was growing blind or the dolt was getting better at concealment.

Darcy looked from one to the other, clearly reassured.

“The cat would agree, if he could only speak,” and that remark from Thor was entirely uncalled for.

“Do you, Salem?” and the smile turned on him. He tried again to get to her, but Jane was already speaking. “No, no cat. You have to stay perfect.”

“Okay…” and Darcy looked closely at Jane. “Are you crying?” She went to hug Jane but Jane evaded her.

“Perfect means no hugs either! I’m just so happy that… I’m just happy, all right?” Jane smiled a wide watery smile. “Now go, have fun!”

“Okay, mom, I’ll try,” responded Darcy with a grin, and the door closed behind her.

The cat stopped struggling, in the shock of her exit. She was leaving to “have fun”. Where was she going? The cat arched his back and glared at Thor, but his anger collapsed in the face of Thor’s ill concealed disappointment. He lifted the cat to his knee and drew him close.

“Peace brother,” he murmured in to the cat before Jane got back to the couch. “She is not for you.”

* * *

Darcy loved her dress but had been worried about the green. She never wore green. But after all the constraints Pepper’s guy George had put in place - NO retro, NO stiff fabrics, NO trousers, NO black - she was just glad they settled on something. The reaction from Jane and Thor had reassured her, and the look in Steve’s eyes when he saw her told her they hadn’t been faking.

It was kinda unfortunate that those blue eyes now had a faint pucker between them as they looked through the menu.

She held up the menu and hissed to him behind it. “Psst! Everything okay?”

Steve looked up and the pucker faded a little. “Sure.” He paused a little. “You’ve eaten in places like this before, right?”

Darcy put down the menu and shook her head. “Never been anywhere like this in my life.” Her voice mingled unconcern and pleasure, and Steve’s slight frown was swallowed up in amusement.

“Tony thought…” and then he changed his mind. “Me neither,” he admitted quietly.

Darcy thought, then put the menu back up.

“Can we afford to pay?” she whispered, because something had to be making Steve look like that. Steve looked a little shocked.

“No, I can pay. It’s just…” and he gestured helplessly at the menu. “I don’t know what any of this is.” _Or why dinner costs more than a sea cruise to Europe._

“Well, that’s a relief,” Darcy said, menu down again. “Because I sure can’t. I’ve got student debts to pay. So…” and she flicked through the menu and put it down open in front of him. “If it's okay I’m going for the taster menu. I want to try everything!”

She said this with such enthusiasm that Steve could only look across the table and openly grin. His feeling of discomfort, of being horribly out of place in this austerely white, elegant dining room evaporated completely as Darcy grinned back.

Darcy’s determination to enjoy this new experience was infectious. The rest of the meal was a conspiracy between the two of them to wring the last ounce of enjoyment out of the meal. The waiter explained what was in each dish and how the flavors complemented each other, and seemed pleased with their interest.

“This is freaking _amazing_ ,” said Darcy for the umpteenth time. “I know I said it before but _this_ is _incredible_.”

“I never ate food that was art before,” Steve said, and Darcy pursed her lips in approval. That was it - this was freaking _art_.

The waiter materialized and Steve asked for the cheque.

The waiter informed him softly that it was all taken care of, sir, Mr Tony Stark was footing the bill.

Steve sat back. “Tony? That…” Words failed him. Both Darcy (and discretely, the waiter) were looking at him. Steve sat there, trying to put into words his sudden realization that Tony had maneuvered him into coming here, knowing (Steve suspected) just how like a fish out of water Steve would feel. If, of course, it hadn’t been for Darcy.

She was sitting now with her head sideways, contemplating him. “That’s very kind of Mr Stark,” she said, turning to the waiter before Steve could speak. “In that case, we’ll also have a bottle of Bollinger. To go. Thank you,” and her smile was sweet.

“Mr Stark favors the 2002 Bollinger Blanc de Noirs Vieilles Vignes Franais,” the waiter offered, helpfully.

“Then we’ll take that,” said Darcy.

* * *

Thor had made a mistake keeping him from Darcy. The forty eight hours until he saw her again simply gave time for the resentment to smolder and become white hot. The heat of its flame engendered its own logic - how dare she dress so, flaunt herself before him, then leave! His mood was not lightened by Darcy telling him all the events of the night.

He stalked around the room like a miniature panther, unable to settle, looking for he knew not what.

“So we just walked out with the champagne - I think Tony must totally have pissed off that waiter sometime cause he was far too happy about it.” Loki eyed the large bottle with disfavour; it was, he couldn’t help noticing, completely empty.

Darcy leaned back and stroked his back as he stalked by, then picked up her mug of tea and kept talking. “It was just _incredible_ , Salem, the room and the food…” Loki sneered internally. A room, when the Rainbow Bridge could whisk her to the golden towers and infinite falls of Asgard? Food, when the delicacies of the Nine Realms could be brought to her table? There was no possibility of her seeing these things, of course, but how typical of a Midgardian to be satisfied with so little!

“…So we came back here and popped open the champagne…,” and at that point Loki’s resentment exploded into fury. This had to stop. It could no longer be tolerated. He jumped into her lap, deliberately knocking the mug from her hands. Tea spilled all over her as he jumped away.

“ _Ooow_! Salem!” and she was up, pulling at her t-shirt as she headed for the bathroom. He followed, a cold desire to see her displacing all else, until he saw her at the sink again, pajamas on the floor, splashing water on her stomach. The sight of the red marks on her skin froze him.

He had wanted her to stop talking. He had wanted to assert his dominance, to see the body that Steve had surely not seen. (Surely not yet, by the Nine, and surely not ever.) He had not remembered the weakness of Midgardians or the risks they took (why drink something so hot as to burn? How could such foolhardiness survive?) He had forgotten how fragile she was.

He had been ready to destroy one world and invade another. He had fought his brother and killed SHIELD agents, but all those deaths, actual and planned, had seemed unavoidable, necessary, _academic_. None affected him as much as this, patches of scalded skin on a Midgardian body.

It had not been his plan, but more than that, she had done nothing to deserve it. She had shown him nothing but kindness, had never deceived him. The shock of her injury put his resentment into perspective. She had no idea who he was or what the color of her garments might mean in a Realm she had barely heard of. His rancor was petty and ill-founded.

He had no idea how badly she was hurt. Horrified at himself he didn’t know that he was making any sound until she turned and he realized he was mewing gently, cowering as if afraid.

“It’s okay, Salem,” and she came over and picked him up. He stiffened because this, at least, he had avoided while he gorged on her beauty. He half dreaded the rush of lust he expected, cradled against her naked body as she cooed and soothed him, the cause of her pain.

“Don’t worry, sweetie, it’s okay.”

But the rush never came. He suddenly realized that all his desire for her was in his head; there was and could be no physical component. His feline form felt only reassurance and a sensual pleasure in her touch, a pleasure infinitely innocent beside Loki’s craving to see her body. 

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault.”

But it was.

And he strongly suspected he would suffer for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unlucky for some. 
> 
> Was thinking of [this dress (as worn by Kat Dennings)](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/105295231792/from-here) only an exact match for Loki's green. 
> 
> And yes, it's coincidence (but hey, she does look good in that color so not that out there). 
> 
> It's beginning to look a lot like... (coming in the next chapter)   
> Will have much less time for writing over the holidays, so writing while I can. Enjoy.


	14. The Hidden Claw

It had to be admitted, Loki seemed to have fallen into a pattern of unwise decisions. The time from Thor’s almost coronation to now was replete with great victories slipping through his fingers at the last moment. Why was it that this foolish compulsion seem the worse decision of all?

He had decided to stop. It was ridiculous to think he _needed_  her. It was impossible.

But it did not matter, since he would no longer look.

Songs about peace and love were playing in the common room, an utter contrast to the turmoil inside him. He sought the peace of the air conditioning vents, and the distraction of exploring the hidden depths of the building.

* * *

“Hey, what’s up?” said Darcy, sliding into the seat across from Jane. Jane had been at meetings all morning and was now sitting, lunch uneaten, with a pucker between her brows and a distant look in her eye. As Darcy spoke she started guiltily and picked up her fork.

“Not much, just meetings,” she said, toying with her food.

“Is it bad?” Darcy inquired, attacking her pasta. “Are we about to get closed down or something?”

“No! Why would you say that?” said Jane, hedging. The project was actually going well, so well that they would enter proper testing in March. Testing that was going to be far too risky to do near any population center, let alone in the heart of Manhattan. Which meant things were going to change for Darcy unless Jane could come up with something. That is, if Darcy wanted to come... 

“How are things going with Steve?”

Darcy blinked a little at the change in subject. “Okay, I guess. It’s…I don’t know, it’s moving kinda slow.” 

“He _is_ from 1940,” Jane pointed out.

“Yeah. Talked to Oma at Thanksgiving after a few schnapps and I don’t think they were as uptight as all that.” Jane imagined Darcy's Oma as an 1940s version of Darcy and grinned. “But, you know, I think he likes me and I like him so…”

“So…?” teased Jane.

“So, why are we changing the subject? What’s up, boss lady?” Darcy had an investigative glint in her eye Jane had learned to respect. She scrambled for a plausible excuse. 

Inspiration hit. “You know I’m visiting my mom in London? Well, she really wants to meet Thor. I was trying to think of a way for Thor to come.” 

“Why can’t he?” asked Darcy, and took another forkful of pasta. “Too much super-villainy scheduled for the holidays?”

“Well, there’s the cat and…”

“The cat?” and Darcy shook her fork in emphasis. “I got the cat. I’ll babysit. It’ll be fine!”

“For ten days?” Jane’s voice was a high pitched squeak.

“Sure for ten days. It’s only in the evenings anyways. What could go wrong?”

This wasn’t going exactly as Jane planned. “But…what about Steve…”

“Haven’t you been listening? No sleepovers for Darcy, so the nights are okay. Salem is in the common room all day. The whole gang are hanging out for Christmas together anyhow. So no problem. I got it, Jane.”

“I don’t know what to say.” Jane was entirely sincere saying that. But even though it had been meant as a distraction, the offer that resulted was tempting. Showing Thor around London (away from the Avengers, away from the cat) would be a dream come true. “Thanks Darcy, really. If you're sure I'll talk to Thor”

“Sure,” said Darcy and waved the thanks away with her fork.

* * *

Happy’s expression was even less happy than usual. Pepper stood in the meeting room enthralled by the images surrounding her. And if Happy was any judge, this Killian guy was pretty enthralled with her.

But would Tony take it seriously? Not on your life. Too busy making cracks about tech and missing the point.

“You know what? You should take more of an interest in what’s going on here. This woman is the best thing that’s ever happened to you and you’re just ignoring her.”

“Happy, when she gets to New York she’s going to get my undivided attention. Is the jet ready to go?”

Happy looked sideways at the screen. “I don’t work for you.” The screen gave him a hard stare back. Happy grimaced and gave in. “Yes, yes it is.”

“Decoys?”

“And Pepper thinks _I'm_ paranoid,” complained Happy. “It’s all lined up. You’re _arriving_ tomorrow morning. Far as anyone will know, you’ll be in Malibu for the holiday season.”

“Pepper thinks you’re paranoid?” and the screen was full of Tony with his mouth open. More sarcasm. “Is it the way you freak out about giant brains?”

“Just one giant brain, wise guy, and the guy he’s with’s a shifty character. I’m going to follow him, run his plates…”

“No you’re not. You’re not spending the holidays drinking turkey through a straw, you’re flying across with Pepper as planned.” A pause and then, “I miss you Happy.”

Happy sighed. “Yeah, me too, but the way it used to be. I don’t know what’s going on with you any more.”

* * *

Thor had been taken aback when news of the London trip failed to enthuse Loki. The cat had stopped stock still when told, save for his tail, flicking rhythmically back and forth. 

"Will you miss me so much, brother?" Thor asked, asking to provoke rather than believing it the truth. The cat did not react.

The truth was, Loki was torn. Thor's absence was an attractive prospect but staying with Darcy might be problematic. He had thought that looking at her was feeding his desire to look, a simple reinforcement mechanism. But it was more complex than that. He was reminded of the time when he was young and injured, and lay in the healing rooms with no desire to eat. He remembered the broth Frigga had brought and how the smell had awoken the first feelings of hunger. He remembered feeling alive again. 

But this was not so innocent. This was a stain on his honor. Yet the compulsion remained, like a claw rending his self-control, not easily quelled as Loki had thought it would be. 

He even had briefly wondered if this was part of his punishment. He rejected that train of thought quickly. That way lay paranoia and madness. Odin was not so powerful or insightful to do this. As for Frigga, the thought brought a stab of pain. Everything else he had done, he had believed she would approve, or would approve if she only understood. But this? He knew his mother would both understand completely and disapprove utterly. 

Thor was still watching him, concern etched into his face. "I will stay, brother." 

The cat shook his head in a determined, unfeline motion. 

This was ridiculous. It was difficult but he had been strong and would continue so. 

* * *

In the common room the next morning the talk was all about the Chinese Theatre bomb in LA. 

"Why are we sitting here? Why aren't SHIELD getting involved?" asked Steve hotly. 

Natasha looked levelly at him, and then looked at the two civilians, Pepper and Darcy, sitting in earshot. Both knew more than they should, at least from SHIELD's point of view. Steve needed to be careful. 

"SHIELD have protocols, set areas of operation," she said calmly. "There are other agencies. We can't take over everything." 

Steve looked at her for a moment, then dropped his head. "I know. You're right." 

Darcy crossed the room to Steve. "I know it's tough," she whispered. "You want to keep people safe..." 

"And I can't," Steve finished the thought. "I can't but I feel like I should be." He sighed. "It's all wrong." 

"Want me to stay? It's just a shopping trip." 

"No!" Steve's eyes widened. "You should go. I can't believe you haven't been. There's nothing like New York at Christmas." A pause and a thought. "I should have brought you. I'd bring you now but..." 

"No, it's okay. I get it." Darcy pressed a kiss to his cheek. 

"See you in reception in half an hour," said Pepper, leaving the room with Natasha. She threw a knowing look back, and Darcy flicked her away. 

When Darcy got to the reception area, she did a double take. Two brunettes were waiting for her. She stared, and then she realized. “Oh my god, you look amazing!”

Natasha, serene as ever in short choppy dark hair, smiled her half smile while Pepper hid behind her brown hair and then tossed it back off her face. “Do you want a wig too, Darcy? It’s not as much fun as it looks.”

“Nah, I’m good.” The clothes too - they looked totally different in vaguely vintage hipster clothes a million miles from Natasha’s pared down look and Pepper’s muted elegance.

Natasha led them to the basement, down a series of tunnels then out a side door into an alley. “Do you do all this every time you go shopping?” Darcy whispered to Pepper. Pepper grinned at her tone, equal part horrified and impressed. “Only at times like this. It’s more fun if no-body knows me.”

They roamed the streets, soaking up the atmosphere. Crowds bustling, laden with bags; twinkling lights; department store displays as impressive as any Hollywood blockbuster. Darcy breathed deep. She’d done all her shopping online, and honestly found traipsing around shops more stressful than not, but this was magical.

They strolled down to Union Square, the vendors tents striped like candy canes. They wandered around, looking at shelves of pottery; jewellery and trinkets laid out to catch wandering eyes; huge metal bowls of olives and other things Darcy didn’t recognize. The smell of waffles mingled with the scent of fresh greenery. Darcy had never been to Europe, but this was just as she imagined a market in Europe would be.

She bought a Mongolian earflap hat the color of Steve’s eyes, and a catnip mouse for Salem. As the vendor wrapped the mouse for her she looked across at the brown head of Pepper a ten feet away, looking at a mug under the sign “Unemployed Philosopher’s Guild”. Natasha was out of sight; Darcy had last seen her looking at silver trinkets. Darcy took the package and watched the crowd for a moment, enjoying the atmosphere.

She headed towards the Philosopher’s Guild. Just as Pepper took her package and turned to face Darcy, Darcy was shoved hard. As she sprawled on the ground the woman who shoved her moved between Pepper and Darcy. At the same time a man, with shaved head and cold blue eyes, stepped up and put his hand across Pepper’s mouth.

Pepper reacted instantly. Her elbow went back into the man’s stomach at the same time as she slammed her foot back into his leg. The man clearly hadn’t expected resistance, and loosened his grip. Pepper twisted out of his hold as Darcy put two and two together and scrabbled across the ground. She grabbed the foot of the woman who had shoved her. The woman stumbled, then turned and aimed a kick that never landed. Out of nowhere Nat appeared and hit her hard across the face.

“Get ready to move,” Natasha ordered, then moved forward and swung a kick at Pepper’s attacker. Darcy scrambled to her feet keeping her eyes on the woman on the ground. An orange glow crossed the woman’s skin where Nat had struck her. Then she opened her eyes and Darcy scrambled back, because they were glowing fiery red.

The next thing Darcy knew was that Natasha had an arm around her and was propelling her through the fair, with Pepper on her other side. They came out at the subway as a black SUV wretched to a halt. They scrambled into the back and the driver screeched away.

Darcy breathed deep, in and out, to calm her hammering heart. “Holy shit!” she said and looked at the other two.

Pepper looked as disbelieving as she did. “No,” she said, answering Darcy’s unasked question. “That doesn’t usually happen.”

“You did well there,” Natasha said to Pepper. “You remembered your training.”

"I had a good teacher." Pepper shook her bag and made a face. “I think the bastard made me break Tony’s mug.”

* * *

Back in the Tower, Tony was focused in a way Darcy had never seen him. It was a little scary. She concentrated on giving every little detail as Happy, Natasha and Pepper listened, the latter two adding details. The good thing was, Darcy could say things she wasn't sure she'd have said to the police. 

“And, okay, this sounds nuts, but her face glowed where she was hit, and when she opened her eyes…it was like there was a fire inside her.” 

Tony was tapping, going through camera feeds, then threw a picture up on the display. “Is this her?”

“That’s her,” Natasha said calmly as Darcy nodded.

“Looks like she came alone,” said Tony. He brought up another feed, scanning for the male attacker. The three women watched closely, then Darcy spoke.

“There!”

“Him?” Happy burst out. “That’s that guy!”

Tony turned and looked directly at him. "What? You saw him in LA? When?”

Happy waved his hands in frustration. “He's the guy I told you about. The creepy guy.” Tony’s face remained blank. “He was with Killian!”

“You mean the guy I might recognize if you knew how to twist the screen around?” Tony said.

Happy rolled his eyes. “Don’t pin this on me, you told me not to follow him. Lucky I ignored you and snapped his number plate.”

Tony grabbed the phone from Happy's hand, threw the picture onto the display, then started a search. Data poured onto the screen.

“We got him!” said Tony.

“Why were you talking to Tony about this guy?” asked Pepper. Happy looked uncomfortable.

“You can fight about it someplace else,” said Tony. “And when Pepper's torn strips off you Happy, could you find out how anyone knew where Pepper was going to be today? I’m going to do some digging into Mr Aldrich Killian.”

“And this is the point where SHIELD does not what to know what happens next,” said Natasha, and drew Darcy after her. Darcy did want to know, but went anyway. She heard Tony’s last words as she closed the door.

“J, get me Rhodey.”

* * *

“I can change the flight,” said Jane. Her carryon sat at her feet. Her face was full of concern.

“Don’t be crazy,” said Darcy. “I’m fine. I’m in a building surrounded by super heroes, security tech and Tony’s ex-body guard looking hard at everyone. I’m the safest person in New York.”

“I know that,” Jane said. “I’m concerned about you. YOu were in the middle of an attempted kidnapping…you could suffer delayed shock…”

Darcy had an inspiration. “If I need you, I promise I’ll let you know and Thor can fly you back.”

Jane’s dubious look didn’t fade when Thor enthusiastically agreed. “And I shall stay with Darcy tonight, to ensure she has had no ill effects.”

It was not wholly concern for Darcy that led Thor to stay in her apartment until she insisted she was going to bed. The cat behaved impeccably under his watchful eye. Thor was satisfied.

"I am trusting you," Thor told the cat as he left. "Have a care not to prove me the fool you think me." The cat listened, calm and attentive. "And take care of her, if she needs it." He waited for the nod then smiled and left.

The cat resisted all temptation. In the night, he was awoken in his basket by a faint sound. He listened and heard the sound again - a soft whimper. The cat went to investigate and found Darcy asleep, whimpering slightly at her dreams. When he jumped on the bed and touched her, her whimpering stilled. The cat curled up at her feet and went to sleep. Thor had laid a charge on him, had he not? This was nothing more than fulfilling that oath.

He would still not look.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Macavity's The Mystery Cat  
> They call the Hidden Claw  
> For he's a Master Criminal  
> Who can defy the Law.
> 
> As you can see we're into Iron Man 3 (at last). Since Tony insists on staying in NY, Happy doesn't end up at the Chinese Theatre, the plan to get Pepper in Malibu can't be carried out and they end up trying at the [Union Market](http://famousankles.com/2007/12/19/union-square-holiday-shops/). (Also, [Unemployed Philosopher's Guild](http://www.philosophersguild.com/).) 
> 
> Also, credit to Tea's [Jekyll and Charlotte](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1288582/chapters/2943556) for why didn't SHIELD get involved in Iron Man 3? Still a recommended read!


	15. Yule Cat

Natasha woke as she always did, straight from sleep into alertness, body still and eyes closed but all her senses aware of the room around her. Outwardly she stirred and stretched, while her mind ticked over the business of the day.

Nothing to be done about SHIELD. Fury had, she knew, gone right to the top but the message was the same. This was not SHIELD business. This was something other agencies could and should handle. 

How much difficulty that would cause would depend on one factor.

“Jarvis?”

“Ms Romanov?”

“Is Tony awake?”

There was a pause. “Yes, Ms Romanov. I’m afraid I can’t reveal his location, but he wanted you to know that you have mail.”

“Is anyone in the common room?”

“Not as yet.”

“Thank you, Jarvis.”

* * *

If Natasha had been given to groaning aloud she would have done so now. Instead she put on soft booties and padded down to the common room. Quickly she checked the room, then moved to the back of one couch. She reached underneath, to the gap underneath where the fabric was slit. She drew a slim document box out through the gap, a box made of the same metal as Stark’s armor, and pressed her finger tip to the lock. It swung open. She perched on the back of the couch and quickly flicked through it.

On the top were two notes. The first read:

“Nat, Your hands might be tied by SHIELD but mine aren’t. I’m going after Killian. If that means I have to give up being a consultant, so much the better. Tell Agent it's been a blast except it hasn't. Less you know the better. Look after Pepper, she needs you. I don’t. Tony.”

The second simply said:

“SHIELD don’t want to know, but I thought Legal might. I got this. Got Rhodey if I need backup. Look after Pep for me. T.”

Underneath were printouts - a list of possible AIM moles within SI (much of the list apparently contributed by Happy), schematics for a house near Miami, project details headed “EXTREMIS - HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL”, a printout of a mathematical model placing a human at the heart of the Chinese Theatre bombing: a human who had been a test subject in the Extremis project. The final papers were a series of photographs which she flicked through so rapidly they blurred together into a virtual movie of a human being burning up from the inside.

With a slap of papers Natasha neatened the bundle and put all but one back in the document box. On the positive side, it seemed that Tony was in thinking clearly and in control (as much as Tony ever was). Another plus was that she had the data with no electronic trail. She could do what she could for him under the radar. Then they would all have to wait.

She had only experienced Christmas Eve as an adult, but waiting seemed an appropriate activity. And it should be possible to keep everyone distracted...

She had her own security arrangements in her apartment. The box was concealed in the wall with a small incendiary device. Any tampering and the papers would be gone. The first note she left in her wastebasket, ripped into tiny pieces.

If she had received that first note alone, she would have rung Coulson. So she rang him.

“Hello,” replied Coulson, with a hint of surprise in his voice that was nicely judged. No-one listening would have thought they had spoken only a few hours before, just before Coulson went to Portland.

“We have a situation. Tony has gone off piste.”

Coulson’s reply was a sigh. “Has he resigned again?”

“You know the drill.”

"Where?" 

"He chose not to say." 

“Well, keep me appraised.” Coulson’s next words were wry. “If it’s absolutely necessary. I’ll have a team on standby if we need to tidy up.”

“Of course.” She paused, then smiled, the action filling her voice with warmth that surely anyone listening would pick up. “I’m sorry to have disturbed you. Let me make it up to you with dinner in Eleven Madison Park when you’re back.” _It's Miami._

“You should disturb me more often.” Coulson sounded amused. Natasha could hear a woman’s voice in the background and a suggestion of a swat. “Will Stark be there?” The question was faintly sarcastic.

“No, Tony can stay away. His armor too. The rest of the gang should be free.” _Only Rhodes as backup._

“We’ll see,” said Coulson. _Message received and understood._

“Enjoy your Christmas,” said Natasha and gently put the receiver down.

* * *

When Loki thought of it in later days, it was as a day of waiting. A day of cinnamon and secrets.

Darcy slept in. Clint was waiting cross legged on the counter by the time she and the cat arrived.

“Hey Darce. Let’s get some cheer going.” He waved around the bare room.

“Wonder why they didn’t decorate in here,” Darcy said, pulling a face as she looked around. Clint looked down to pick up his juice bottle cap and toss it toward the cat. He didn’t, Loki noticed, answer the question.

“You bake, right? Let’s get some cookies on. Decorations are over there and Steve’s gone for a tree.” A strange errand, in the cat's opinion. There was no fireplace large enough here to contain one.

Darcy tilted her head. "You bake? For real?" 

"I am a man of many talents." 

"Okay then. How many?" 

"Many as we can. Steve will eat them all anyway." 

"Okay," Darcy rolled up her sleeves. "Let's do this." 

They were weighing ingredients when Natasha and Pepper came in. Natasha got two mugs of coffee while Pepper watched the work in progress. 

"Wanna join in?" Darcy asked. 

"Believe me, you don't want me to," Pepper replied. She looked tired and worn. "But I'll decorate in exchange for some cookies." 

"I'll help with that," Bruce said quietly as he entered the room, a book under his arm. "After your coffee." 

Natasha and Pepper brought their coffees to a couch. Bruce made his tea and watched the cookie making for a moment. 

"Go and chill out," Clint told him. "You're doing the turkey tomorrow." 

"Am I?" and Bruce laughed. "I don't remember agreeing to that." 

"Unanimous vote," Clint told him. Bruce chuckled and wandered off with his tea. He settled in his corner and opened his book. 

It all looked very quiet, very normal. But the cat noticed that Darcy had a small crease of worry between her brows when she looked at Pepper. Clint did not look over at all…which, the cat considered, told its own story.

In Asgard as a boy, Loki had been quiet where Thor was loud, unnoticed while Thor drew all eyes. Little wonder then that he had become expert at gathering secrets, at seeing the unexpected as he walked in the shadows. He had grown to enjoy it, the tiny taste of power as tempting as any sweet stolen from the kitchens. He had left that small thrill behind seeking deeper secrets, but had rediscovered it wandering the halls of visitors after the storm. He tasted it again now.

The smell of spices filling the air as the pile of cookies grew. The man called Happy arrived and paid court to the lady Pepper, Natasha crossing the room to speak to the Doctor. Court was an apt word, it applied in both senses, if Loki was any judge. Did the lady know how Happy felt? Loki thought she did, from the kind firmness of her dismissal, before the man left to visit his kin.

As for Natasha and Bruce, something difficult to define had changed between them, since the last time Loki had seen them together. The awkwardness at the Halloween party was gone. The edge of unease had faded. 

The Doctor knew the secret, if Loki was any judge. Happy did not.

Steve arrived, cheeks pink from the cold, hair tousled under a beanie, lugging a twelve foot tree. "You look like a Rockwell painting," Darcy told him. 

"Does that mean I get a cookie?" Steve asked, hand already stretching out. 

"Nope, cookies are for tree trimming time." Steve grabbed one anyway and grinned at her exaggerated frown.

"Tony up yet?" Steve threw the question over his shoulder as he brought the tree to the corner. 

"I haven't seen him," Darcy replied, the little crease reappearing between her brows. She was no fool, his mortal, the cat decided. He made to leap onto the counter, but much like Steve, he was shooed away. "Sorry Salem, cat fur and cookie dough don't mix." 

The cat wandered away to investigate the boxes not far from where Clint and Steve manoeuvred the tree onto its stand. It seemed the tree was not for burning after all. A strange custom since cut as it was the tree would surely die, unlike the plants in pots. Nor was it especially ornamental. The smell of pine reminded him suddenly how long it was since he had been outside. He felt a sudden desire to feel the wind on his face. How long since he had felt that? 

Clint and Steve joined him in investigation of the boxes. The contents shone even in the cold daylight. Steve spoke softly. 

“We can’t just pretend this isn’t happening,” he said quietly. “We need to do something.”

Clint looked up from the box he was stooped over. "Who's pretending? We've work to do." 

Steve sighed. "I'm not twelve years old. You don't need to distract me. We all know what Tony's up to." 

Clint straighten. "And our orders? SHIELD has told us to stay put." 

Steve's brows came down. "He needs backup." 

"Glad to hear it, Steve. I didn't know you felt that way." 

"This is different and you know it. We have to do something."

"We are doing something. Not just putting up trees," Clint spoke more forcefully as Steve's mouth opened, "We're protecting Pepper. That attempt on her was no coincidence. Tony needs us for that." 

Steve nodded unwillingly.

A quiet voice broke in. "We're SHIELD agents. You’ve been a soldier, you know how it works. Right now, we're in reserve. If we're needed, we can be reached. We scatter who-knows-where, we can’t. It’s that simple.”

Natasha stood behind them.  Only the cat had noticed her approach.

“We also serve who stand and wait?” Steve quoted, looking sideways at her. “That never sat well with me.”

"No kidding," muttered Clint under his breath. The conversation was over. Darcy was coming over, a platter piled with cookies in her hands, Bruce and Pepper following. 

Darcy looked from face to face, and shrugged. "Come on guys. Less talking, more trimming!"

They got to it. There was much cookie eating and concentrated tree trimming and room decorating. Bruce systematically hung ornaments on lower branches, while Clint and Natasha performed feats of balancing to decorate the top.

“I’d have got a smaller tree if I’d known you two would show off,” Steve remarked.

“They’d do it anyway,” Darcy returned in a stage whisper.

It was a most peculiar custom, the cat thought, but it was amusing, offering garlands to battle, ornaments to chase, and most entertaining of all, boxes to sit in.

“Salem, would you get out of there?” Darcy appealed. The cat looked up innocently and mewed. “That’s the fourth time. He’s doing it on purpose,” she groused. The cat was amused at her insight. As much as the cat enjoyed the boxes, the trickster loved the mischief more. Annoyance only flushed her cheeks and made her more alluring than ever. 

Darcy looked around her. “And he’s hidden the star again.”

“Should have put it on the top at the start,” Clint said, his words muffled through a mouthful of garland, as he teetered dangerously from the cat’s playground stringing greenery around the ceiling.

Steve looked around. He picked up something sodden and black. "Well, I didn't find the star but I did find my hat."

"Aw, Salem!" 

Natasha grabbed the cat by the scruff of the neck and picked him up out of the box. As always with the Widow, the cat decided it was safer not to protest. “Who volunteers to cat sit?”

Pepper put up a hand, just as Jarvis spoke.

“If I might…” Everyone froze. “Ms Potts, I have a message for you in the other room.”

Pepper stood still for a moment and then smiled around at everyone. “I’ll just take this and then I’ll take the cat.”

All eyes watched as she left the room, then looked away in a general pretence of busyness.

The tension eased as Pepper returned, head high with a faint smile on her face. Natasha crossed the room and dumped the cat in her arms.

“He’s okay,” Pepper said softly over the black fur in her arms. “It _was_ Killian behind the LA bombing and the attempted kidnap. His people are after the President. Tony’s called in a warning. But you know himm. He wants to deal with it himself.”

Natasha’s face showed nothing. “Then we carry on as planned. Can you do it?”

Pepper smiled. “I need some space. Cat sitting will suit me right now. You were right though - it's easier when everyone is busy.” She looked across at Darcy scolding Steve for eating the last cookie as he grinned at her. “Does she have any idea what she’s getting into?”

“Who does?” Natasha replied, stroking the cat. “Even when you’re out there it doesn’t get easier.” She flicked a fond yet exasperated look at Clint, hanging upside down. Pepper followed her gaze and smiled a forced smile.

Natasha scratched the cat under the chin. “It’s the hardest thing, to know that someone you love is putting themselves in harms way, and there is nothing you can say to make them reconsider.” The cat turned his head sideways to watch her. She looked down at him, and crooned gently. “Even Thor was foolhardy once, laughing at the advice he was given. Is that not so, little one?” She looked up again at Pepper. “But its more than that with Tony, isn’t it?”

“I wish I knew” and Pepper sighed shakily. “He’s obsessed with his work. He always has been but not like this. He won’t leave New York. I talked about resigning but he says I’m the only one he trusts with the company. He’s slipping away from me, Nat. I don’t know what to do.”

* * *

The cat stayed with Pepper, as people came and went, and a large pot of chowder was cooked. It was purely tactical: he was focused on other secrets, he had almost forgotten he had secrets of his own. If he was particularly friendly and well-behaved, nothing more should be read into it than that. After dinner, he went to investigate the tree as the Midgardians discussed what movies they would watch. He batted the shiny objects with a paw. Adorned so, it was not unattractive. He went to the trunk of the tree and looked up.

Mid conversation Clint stopped and grinned. Darcy turned, only to see a small black head just below the star. “Salem, you get down here right now!”

Nothing happened. Clint put his head to one side. 

“No, Clint. You are not climbing the tree.”

Clint turned. “You’re no fun, Natasha.”

* * *

“Are you sure this is a Christmas movie?” Steve asked for the second time.

“It totally counts,” Darcy told him. “And John McClane is a bad ass.”

“He’d never make a SHIELD agent,” said Natasha. Clint threw a cushion at her over Bruce's head.

“Why not?” asked Bruce, ducking.

“He made himself vulnerable,” Natasha replied.

Bruce consider this. "It's probably unavoidable." 

Clint threw another cushion. “He’s a cop. Cops are allowed take off their shoes.”

“This reminds me of watching a movie about computers with Tony,” Pepper observed to Darcy.

McClane had just dropped Marco's corpse onto Powell's car when they heard the roar above them. Clint was closest and made it to the window first. The cat leapt up his back to his shoulder and saw a flare of jets in the sky.

Clint turned as the others reached him. “Did Tony come back?” he asked. Natasha and Pepper looked blank. Jarvis answered.

“No, Mr Barton. Mr Stark is calling his other suits.”

Another dark figure showed against the night sky, jets bright behind him, then another and yet another. Pepper breathed out two words. “House party.” Then louder, voice carefully controlled: “Is he all right, Jarvis?”

“Yes, Ms Potts,” and the AI’s voice seemed more gentle than usual. “There has been no break in contact since it was re-established earlier.”

"Can you tell us what's going on?" Natasha asked. 

"Mr Stark does not want to put you in a difficult position, " the AI said. 

“Are reporters at the scene yet?”

“Not yet Ms Romanov, but I suspect it will only be a matter of time.”

Natasha send off a quick text to Coulson. _Rain check dinner. Watch for breaking news._

They stood and watched until the roaring above them stopped. “Twenty three,” said Steve, quietly.

Pepper exchanged glances with Natasha. _Twenty-three suits in six months?_

The image of McClane frozen on screen gave way to darkness, cut by streaks of light. “…now live from Miami, when a battle seems to be taking place between Iron Man and an unknown assailant…”

They turned in silence and watched. 

“…reports that Iron Patriot rushed another man from the scene. Claims it was the president have neither been confirmed nor denied by the White House…”

* * *

They had watched until the battle was over and Jarvis told them Tony was coming home. 

They waited for him in the penthouse, Darcy holding Pepper's hand as Natasha talked on a secure line with Coulson and Bruce checked his med kit for the tenth time. Then there was a roar, and a succession of armors landing, and then marching in, battle damaged, towards Tony’s workshop. The last armor, more battered than the rest stopped. It removed its faceplate to reveal Tony’s face.

“Hi kids. Hi honey, I’m home,” he said, as he collapsed and was caught by Bruce and Steve.

* * *

Darcy woke up on a leather couch in Tony’s penthouse. Someone had pulled a blanket over her and curled up over her toes was Salem. He stirred, blinked then walked up her body to snuggle under her chin.

“He’s the best watchdog I ever saw.” Steve was watching across the room. “Once you fell asleep he spat at anyone who came near you.”

“He spat at you,” came Clint’s sleepy voice from wherever he was hiding.

Darcy eyed the cat curling into her arms, lifted him into the air and went nose to nose with him. “Were you mean to Steve, Salem? Don’t be mean to Steve.” She sat up as Steve poured coffee and frowned. “Tony? How’s Tony?”

“Indestructible”, came Clint’s voice again.

“Tony’s fine. Bruce reckons he’ll sleep for the next twelve hours at least.” Steve crossed the room with a mug of coffee and handed it over with a kiss to Darcy’s forehead. The cat glared but stayed motionless and silent in her arms. “Merry Christmas Darcy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title because I found out a few weeks ago that the [Yule Cat](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yule_Cat) is a thing!
> 
> In case it wasn't clear, Coulson and Natasha have their own private code, so they can share information without SHIELD knowing. When you're dealing with the Avengers, it's necessary. 
> 
> Steve may lead on the battle field, but Natasha is in charge the rest of the time!


	16. Cat Among the Pigeons

Half-heartedly, the cat batted at the bubbles. The time for Thor to return was drawing near and he was not certain if he was glad or sorry. 

After the battle the day of the feast had been full of laughter. Never had he enjoyed a celebration more, from Darcy forcing Tony Stark to peel potatoes despite his pleas of injury to Clint finally succumbing to temptation late at night and attempting to climb the tree. 

The days following had seen the group scatter for cleanup and research, and his days were with Darcy alone. The evenings spent watching the saga Darcy had gifted the Captain was less to his taste. The tale itself was palatable enough, but the Captain’s restraint around Darcy was a paradoxical irritation. 

It was impossible, living in the same apartment and Darcy unaware as she was, for him not to see her in some form of undress. The Captain gave him the uneasy feeling that he was not turning away as quickly as he ought. If he was sitting as the Captain sat, so very close to Darcy, with her looking at him as she looked at the Captain, he would not sit so calmly. He would kiss her mouth and taste her skin and take her on that very couch, and the tale of the star wars might join the Svartálfar, for all he would care. 

He did not understand the mortal’s restraint. Yet it galled him to know that the self-control he had always prided himself on was exceeded by another, and a Midgardian at that. 

Even now, as he sat on the edge of the bath with Darcy relaxing, with her eyes shut and head back, and with flashes of white skin peeking through the bubbles, she was far too alluring for his peace of mind. 

His old ploy of retreating into his thoughts and allowing his feline instincts take control had failed him. The cat had no reserve, no compunction about snuggling under her sweaters, of kneading her stomach or lying across her bare legs and playing with her hair. His thoughts could not make him blind. 

It was torture. He didn’t want it to stop. But Thor and his mortal would return today. 

A tapping on the door - they had returned now.

“Typical,” groused Darcy and the cat turned and leapt from the bathside as she rose dipping water and bubbles and reached for her robe. Once wrapped, the cat was around her feet, mewing to be picked up. She grinned and grabbed him, ready to kiss him on the nose. But he moved first, paws soft as velvet on either side of her face, rubbing his nose and mouth against her cheek and mouth. She picked him up and rubbed him under the chin. 

“Guess this is goodbye sweetie. I’m kinda sorry to see you go. It’s been nice having you here.” 

The cat’s green eyes studied her for a moment, then he snuggled into her, his head pushing the neck of her robe aside. He settled close against her, his nose pressed against the curve of her neck and stayed there tight against her body as she walked until she was within a foot of the door. Then he wriggled free and leapt to the floor. Darcy laughed at him. 

“Sure, pretend you’re a tough guy. I know better!” 

Jane started talking the moment the door opened. Darcy’s diagnosis: far too much coffee on the plane. 

“We got back but Thor’s been called away, so I’m going to take him. DC I mean.” 

“Here he is,” and Darcy opened the door wider to display one cat, sitting on the back of the couch, pretending total disinterest. “110 per cent okay, as promised. How was London?” 

“London was…,” started Jane walking in. She stopped dead when she took in Darcy’s wet feet. 

“Were you in the bath?” 

“Yeah. Since I was staying in anyway and your flight was delayed I grabbed some me time.” 

“But he wasn’t in there with you?” 

“Say what?” Darcy shook her head at her co-worker. “Are you nuts? Bath plus cat does not relaxing me-time make.” Then just the tension was leaving Jane’s shoulders, “He sat on the side, of course.” 

His studied pose of indifference didn’t blind Loki to the look Jane shot at him. What ill fortune awaited him now? 

“I hope he hasn’t been too much trouble,” Jane said, and the hint of vexation in her tone made Darcy’s wide grin falter. 

“No, he wasn’t. He was cool. Ask anyone. He’s even got over his thing about Steve.” 

“But I bet you didn’t get a moment to yourself,” Jane suggested, as she crossed the room and picked up the cat. He didn’t struggle, though the tension in her hands made them stiff and hard against his body. 

Darcy shrugged. “Sure, he was a bit clingy, but you’d expect that. You missed your Thor and your Janey, right baby?” The last sentence was crooned across at the cat. Both Jane and the cat looked unmoved. 

“As long as he gave you more space than he gives me. He’s there all the time, when I wash, when I dress…” One did not need to be the god of lies to know Jane was lying, and Darcy frowned. 

“What’s up Jane? Yeah, he was around me a lot, but I didn’t mind. So, you know, chill.” 

“I’m chill,” and Jane’s arms were now as hard and cold as iron. “I’m just tired. Can we maybe catch up tomorrow?” 

“Sure,” and Darcy was all relaxed concern. “You get some rest - and no more coffee!” She bent to the cat again and kissed him on the nose. “Be good, Salem.” 

Jane marched out the door and up the corridor to the elevator in total silence. She said nothing as she walked to her own front door, even as she shifted the cat in her arms to get her key. She locked the door behind her and put the cat down with the care you give to putting something down that you really want to hurl to the ground and break into a million pieces. 

She looked at the small black shape. The small black shape looked up, all wide-eyed innocence. Her eyes narrowed. 

“Don’t give me that, you fucking bastard. How could you?” 

The cat mewed. Behind the wide eyes Loki was intrigued and impressed. He would never have believed that Thor’s mortal had such fire in her. Jane started walking back and forth, anger and indecision in every line of her. 

“It’s my fault. My fault because I trusted you not to be a complete shit. I forgot what you are, I got sucked into Thor’s belief that underneath there was something worth saving. But all that’s underneath is a creep and a pervert.”

Fire, and a distinct lack of wisdom in choosing her words. The cat’s back arched and his eyes became emerald slits. 

“Oh, don’t even try that on. I left you alone with Darcy and you preyed on her. You exploited a good person who cares about you. You make me sick.” 

She turned her back on him and walked to her room, throwing her last word back at him before slamming her door. 

“I’ll see you neutered before I leave you alone with Darcy again.” 

The slam reverberated around the room. The cat huffed and stalked towards his bed. Doubtless the mortal would have calmed down in the morning. 

In this, as in so much of late, Loki found he had miscalculated. 

* * *

Thor had returned that morning after a night spent seizing Extremis technology from the last of AIM’s known bases. He had looked forward to the reunion with his brother, but it was not to be. Instead he was greeted by a furious Jane. The relaxed joyful companion of London was gone. 

He sat and listened to Jane’s suppositions and disappointment gripped him. Yet the cat sat upright, calm and offended. There again, when had Loki ever shown guilt? 

“Is this certain?” Thor asked. “I am loath to believe this.” 

“He kills people and you’re loath to believe he’s a creep?” Jane’s disbelief was obvious. 

Thor paused and looked down at his hands. “What would you do?” 

“Darcy has to know.” 

Thor was still looking at his hands. “What would you have her know?

“What he is,” and Jane indicated with her head toward the cat. 

“What is he?” 

“What…?” and Jane was frowning. “He’s Loki. You told me he was Loki.” 

Thor looked up and his eyes were wide and apologetic. “I beg your forgiveness, Jane, but I never told you such a thing.” 

Jane’s face was suddenly quiet and cold. “Yes. You did.” 

“I did not. You made certain…conjectures. I did not deny them.” 

Jane was open mouthed. So was the cat. It seemed that Thor was more subtle than either had allowed for. 

Thor spoke softly, sadness in his voice. “Let us say that I had a secret that I was bound not to tell. I might not contradict your guesses, but I could not tell you without forswearing myself and paying the price. And it would not just be me paying the price.” 

Jane put all this together in her mind. 

“Is the cat Loki?” 

“No.” But Thor’s gaze was too steady. She knew he was lying. The cat made a sound like a sneeze and lay down. 

There was a long silence. 

“I can’t, Thor.” Jane sat down hard in the seat across from him and put her head in her hands. “I just can’t keep this from her. She needs to know. She’s my friend.” 

“Mine also,” but words hung in the air unspoken. _Yet he is my brother._

Jane lifted her head. “I could tell her.” Neither saw the hair rise on the cat’s back and his eyes widen. 

A shadow of despair crossed Thor’s face. “I swore an oath. I may bend but I will never break it, even if it destroy me. So if you do tell her, I must deny it. If I am not believed…” 

Jane could imagine what the consequences might be from SHIELD. She could not even start to imagine what might happen in Asgard.

She looked down. “I wish you’d come back alone.” Her voice was small in the quiet room.

“I would that I had not come here to cause you pain.” Her hands were suddenly enveloped in his. He had moved to kneel beside her so swiftly and softly she hadn’t noticed. His voice was calm and sad. “Even though this time with you has been for me nothing but joy. I love you, Jane, and I am sorry.” 

She looked up and leaned forward until their foreheads touched. His hand came up to cradle her face, the other lifted her hand to his lips. 

“I love you too, Thor.” Jane closed her eyes for a moment. When they opened they were clear and determined. “But this is a mess. What are we going to do?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was two chapters and also too slow, so I cut to the chase! 
> 
> Tumblr links! Meant to post these last time. Lokitty is not the [only one with a thing for box sitting](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111496452082/spastasmagoria-brattyfatty-if-i-fits-i). [Lokitty plus Clint equals Tree Disaster. ](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111496744912/homeiswheretheheartsare-christmas-cat-card-2013)
> 
> This time, [that cute cat kiss](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111496631287), I can totally see [Lokitty in the bath like this](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111496336532) (though not with Darcy there), and wasn't [Lokitty relieved when it looked like Jane wasn't going to tell Darcy...](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111496307202/next-chapter-of-that-darn-cat-is-up-cat-among-the)
> 
> Hope you enjoy!


	17. Cat's Paw

There are days which start in storm clouds, where dread sits in the pit of your stomach and you have to drag yourself out into the world. And when you do, sometimes, rarely, the clouds part as if they were waiting for you, and a solution presents itself. Jane had walked into the lab with dark circles under her eyes and chewing her lips. Her mind was not where it should be, on the long day of work ahead (and there was so much to organize) but worrying about the Cat Problem. Sitting in the visitor’s chair waiting for her, hair like a shaft of golden sunlight, was Pepper Potts. 

“I know you’re just back,” and Pepper looked fresh and confident, as if she had never known dread in her life, “but could I have just ten minutes of your time?” 

The Jane who walked into the lab the second time still had the dark circles and chapped lips, but her step was lighter. She crossed to her desk while Pepper stopped beside Darcy, who was just tucking her bag away.

“Hi Darcy. Could we have a talk over coffee?” 

Darcy peered up from under the desk. “You’re not firing me, are you?” she asked, innocent eyes undercut by the twitching of her lips. 

“That’s for me to know…,” and Pepper raised her eyebrows mysteriously. 

Darcy telegraphed an enquiry across the room and received the sweeping gesture that is the international signal for “get out of here already” in return. 

“Sure. Starkbucks or…?” 

Pepper got into step beside her. “Starkbucks?” 

“Oh, you know,” and Darcy waved airly. “The coffee place in the lobby. Silly nickname that stuck.” 

They snagged the comfy couch in the corner and settled down with mocha and skinny lattes in hand. 

“Ten dollars says when I tell Tony that nickname, it’ll become official,” Pepper said, amused. 

“You cannot tell him,” Darcy said, eyes wide and serious. “Think of the logo. There is NO way that could end well.” 

Pepper put her head to one side, considered, thought of the horrible possibilities and laughed. 

“See?” said Darcy intensely and continued in an ominous voice, “He can never know.” She took a sip of mocha and sighed with satisfaction. “So, what’s up? You’re back to LA today, right?” 

“Yes,” and Pepper shrugged. “I can’t really justify staying on the East coast any longer.” 

“Must be tough, huh?” 

“It’s not ideal, no.” Pepper put her hands around the cup and let the heat seep into her fingers. “I worry about him. He works too hard.” 

Darcy studied her. “Guess it’s a thing with geniuses…genii…whatever. They just get caught up and have to be kicked out of the lab for their own good. ” 

Pepper took a sip of latte and grinned. “Jane’s lucky to have you. I used to do that for Tony, but it’s difficult when you’re on the other side of the country.” 

“You’ll have to get a deputy,” Darcy observed. “With a badge. With ‘I take no shit’ on it.” 

“I was thinking the same.” Pepper paused. “Interested?” 

Darcy stopped mid drink. “Whaaaat?” She put the cup down hurriedly and looked at Pepper. Pepper looked entirely serious. “You’re not serious.” 

“Why not?” If Pepper was joking, she was running with it. “You’ve got the skills, you’ve got the experience…” 

“I’ve got a job,” Darcy pointed out. “With Jane?” 

Pepper put her head to one side. “Am I right to say Project Stargate is moving to Nevada in March?” 

“Yup, to Eureka.” The site was actually 50 miles away from the town, but Eureka was closest so definitely counted, name wise. “Tony came up with that project name, right? Jane hates it.” 

“I’ll tell you when you come and work for me,” Pepper’s smile was confident. “Do you have a passion for deserts?” 

“Eh, not so much,” Darcy said. “But I’m needed on the project. Jane needs me there.” 

“So does Tony,” and Pepper was deadly serious now. “But that doesn't matter. What do you want? Do you want to go to the middle of nowhere for six months? 

Darcy’s brow creased. 

“What’s your career plan, longterm? Are you planning to move into science? Or focus on project management? Or are you moving on after this?” 

Darcy’s frown deepened. Pepper studied her expression. The next words were matter-of-fact but said with a smile. 

“Let’s leave it there. I’m not going to trick you into it - it won’t work if you’re a cat’s paw. Just consider it. If you have any questions, ring or conference me. I’ll be honest with you.” Pepper took another sip of latte and changed the subject. 

“So, how are things going with Steve?” 

Darcy gave her a look but went with the new topic.

* * *

Darcy was distracted when she came back from coffee, but she wasn’t so distracted that she didn’t notice Jane going for the quiet corner in the canteen at lunch.

“Seriously Jane?” she grumbled as she sat down. “If you want to get rid of me, you could just say.” 

“I don’t,” Jane said. 

“Aha!” Darcy pointed at her accusingly. “So you DID know.” 

“Only just before you did,” and Jane bit into her sandwich. “Pepper said she was going to ask.” 

“But it’s like, impossible,” returned Darcy, digging into her pasta. 

Jane looked at her cautiously. “It’ll be difficult, sure. But it’s not impossible. We’ve got almost three months lead time.” 

Darcy threw down her fork. “You DO want me to go!” 

Jane closed her eyes. “I really don’t. But I do want you to be sure what you want to do.” 

“Well that’s just great,” Darcy said sarcastically. Jane opened her eyes again and watched Darcy stab the pasta. 

“So,” Jane said carefully. “What did Pepper say?” 

“She asked” _stab stab stab_ “what my long term” _stab stab_ “career plans were. And then” _stab_ “she asked after Steve.” 

“Okay.” Jane tactfully looked past Darcy’s stabbing and took another bite of sandwich. 

“No, not okay. Say it Jane.” Darcy’s chin was up, ready for the metaphorical blow to hit. Jane blew the hair away from her face and thought what best to say. 

“Culver do accelerated undergrad physics courses. After we finish in Nevada I could get you onto one, get you sponsored…” 

“Shit!” Darcy’s eyes were wide. “No! I don’t want to do that! Jeeze!” 

“Then why are you going to Nevada?” Jane waited but no answer seemed to be coming so she went on. “I love having you in the lab, Darcy. I love that you’ve kept me sane, kept my spirits up after New Mexico…but because I love you…” and she reached out and touched Darcy’s fork free hand, “I don’t want to take advantage of you.” 

“Aw, shut up!” 

Jane looked straight at Darcy’s embarrassed face. “No, you shut up. You’re a great person with talents and skills. I ask too much of you and…I’m sorry. Truly.” 

Darcy pulled a face. “You want to make me cry now? I’ll have to go to the desert if I cry here. I’ll never live it down.” More quietly, “But, you know, I’ve not done anything I didn’t want to.” 

Jane wished that that was true but it wasn’t. How could it be true when you didn’t know what you were letting yourself in for? Darcy picked up on her reserve. 

“Don’t get upset. I love you too. But I’m not marrying you. No way I’m having a duel with Thor.” She paused and a wicked glint appeared in her eye. “On second thoughts…” 

Jane burst out laughing. “What will I do without you?” 

“I’m not gone yet, boss lady! Darcy Lewis, impossible to shake off!”

* * *

Jane kicked Darcy out early “to think” and with a promise of a full description of London at Darcy’s place at eight, along with ice cream. At a loose end, Darcy went up to the common room to see if Salem was there, but Thor must have collected him already. Natasha was there making tea. 

“Can I ask you something?” Darcy asked, grabbing a mug. 

“Is it about working with Tony?” Natasha leaned back against the counter, ankles crossed and raised an inquiring eyebrow. 

“Are you literally omniscient?” Darcy said. “Cos now I really want to say, no, it’s about my plans to go skydiving, but since I do want your advice…yes it is.” 

“Not _literally_ ,” yet the emphasis Natasha used somehow suggested for all practical purposes she was. “In this case, Pepper asked my advice.” 

“For real?” Darcy poured the hot water on a teabag. “And she asked me anyway?” 

Natasha gave Darcy a long look out of the corner of her eye. “Funny, but let’s be serious. I couldn’t think of a better candidate.” 

“There has to be,” Darcy protested. “Like, I don’t know, someone in SHIELD or…” 

Natasha’s mouth twitched. “Your inability to kill with your bare hands is a plus point, Darcy. You WILL want to kill him; why tempt fate?” 

“There’s a lot of people who can’t kill with their bare hands,” Darcy said. 

“But not so many who can make Tony Stark peel potatoes.” Natasha tilted her head. “It’s probably the most mundane thing he’s ever done. That’s a very specific skill.” 

“You’re not helping,” said Darcy, mouth turned down. 

“No,” said Natasha, unperturbed. “You won’t get any excuse to say no from me. You’re going to have to choose.”

* * *

In Thor’s apartment a conference was underway. 

“That’s my final word,” Jane said, fetching her bag of ice-cream from the freezer. “If she comes to Nevada, I’m going to tell her.” 

Thor looked at his hands twisting together and said nothing. 

“It might be okay.” Neither she nor Thor really believed that. 

“And she’s not looking after him any more,” with a sidelong look at the cat sitting listening. “Even if this hadn’t happened it isn’t right.”

Thor nodded. “What say you, cat?” 

The cat considered a moment, then yawned insolently. Thor sighed, stood up and hugged Jane before she could commit felicide with the ice-cream. 

“He’s being deliberately aggravating,” Jane said as she left. 

Thor kissed her forehead and sighed again. “He was always thus.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr links: [Loki's cover is secure for now](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111892706657/on-a-roll-so-here-you-go-next-chapter-of-that)...and extra kitties for a Lokitty light chapter: [cats and robot](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111892639007/thegentlehoneybee-theartofanimation-goro) and [cat in a fridge](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/111892546972/awwww-cute-cat-in-a-fridge).


	18. What Way Will the Cat Jump?

It took three days, two long conversations-slash-ice-cream-eating-sessions with Jane, multiple calls to Pepper (and boy, when she said she would be honest she meant it) and another talk with Natasha (who also was brutally honest about what Tony was like). And despite everything, no matter how little she liked it, the job with Tony was the better option. “If I could guarantee you a job next Fall,” Jane said, “I really would. But I can’t.” 

It would be a wrench leaving Jane, but there was also a glow of excitement in Darcy’s stomach. Working with Tony sounded fun, despite all the warnings. This sounded like stuff she could do (unlike peeling back the surface of the universe to find out what was underneath). There was _potential_. 

The one person she didn’t talk to was Steve. 

“Why not?” asked Natasha, with a complete lack of embarrassment. She could get away with it, because somehow you felt she was interested, but not all _that_ interested. 

Darcy paused to think about it. “I think…I guess my instinct is, I need to decide this on my own. I don’t want to put pressure on him to say stuff or _be_ stuff…does that make sense?” 

Natasha half shrugged, half nodded. “If that’s what your instinct says, I’d go with it.” 

However, Steve was the first person she told when she did decide. 

“Steve?” 

“Hmmm?” They were watching the episode of “I Love Lucy” in Paris. 

“I’m not going to Nevada.” 

Steve half turned to face her as Ricky lined up the translators. “You’re not?” 

“I’m not.” Darcy reached up and sat onto his knees facing him. His hands went around her waist as she put her hands on his shoulder. “Pepper offered me a job here. I’ve decided to take it.” 

Steve looked torn between happiness and concern. “But you want the job, right? It’s not just…” 

“Just because of you?” Darcy’s mouth was an “oh” of shock. “Of course not,” she went on in mock disapproving tones. Then she leaned across and kissed him. “You’re just the icing on the cake.” 

The second person Darcy told was Jane.

“I’m not surprised,” Jane said. “It’s perfect for you. And it’s not as if we can’t keep in touch.” 

“Oh, I’m going to miss you,” and Darcy leaned across to hug her friend. “And Erik and Thor and Salem…” She came out of the hug and tilted her head. “Speaking of which…what did I do wrong?” 

Jane’s brows went down a little. “What do you mean?” 

“I mean you’re not asking me to look after him any more. You’ve got the intern bringing up his food at lunchtime. What gives, Jane? I swear, he was fine. I looked after him."

“It’s not you, Darcy, it’s him.” Jane put her head back and tried to think how best to put what she was trying to say. “We’re worried he’s a little too…involved with you.” 

“What?” Darcy’s confused face and open raised hands showed complete lack of comprehension. 

“Well, he’s…,” Jane decided to start again. “We’re going to Nevada and you’re staying…we think it will be easier for him to get used to being without you.” 

“Oh.” Darcy flopped back. “So you’re not, like, keeping him locked in like last time?” 

“No. I think Thor learned his lesson!” Jane leaned over and bumped shoulders with Darcy. “It’s absolutely not you. You’re wonderful. He’s a little shit.” 

“He _is not_ ,” protested Darcy, but she was smiling again.

* * *

Loki did not care. He honestly was indifferent. 

The mortal was pleasant to be with, but she was also a distraction. The exploration of the vents within the Tower had progressed no further in the time Thor was in London. As long as he had still had the modicum of freedom to explore, everything else was irrelevant. The cat now threw himself into the endeavor, leaving the common room each day to seek out the broken grill. 

A week after Thor’s return he chose not to return until evening. A full dish awaited him and he ate ravenously. 

“Why did you not return?” So hungry had the cat been that he had not seen Thor sitting in the dim room. He ignored the question. 

“I know this is painful for you, but it is necessary.” The cat sneered inwardly at the words. It was true, when Loki relaxed his grip the cat moped. What else would one expect of a beast parted from one who fed and cared for it? 

Abandoning his food, the cat walked out of the kitchen area, directly to Thor’s feet. He sat, elegant and proud, and yawned widely, luxuriantly. He stretched every inch. Then he sat, tail wrapped around him, flicked his eyes up to Thor’s and stared unblinkingly. 

A pause and Thor shrugged. “Very well. You say it troubles you not.”

A flick of his tail and the cat returned to the food bowl.

* * *

She’d signed the contract the day before but somehow she only believed it was official when she opened the envelope and the star fell out.

It was a beautiful thing, all twisted silvery metal. It took a moment for her to pick out the words made by the vines curving across the narrow frame. I. TAKE NO. SHIT. 

“Guess this is on, then.” 

Darcy read the letter which came with the star, hooked it on her sweater and dialed J on the desk phone. (Erik freaked out when he first heard Jarvis speak so this was the work around.) 

“Hey J, is Tony busy?” 

“No more than usual, Ms Lewis.” Somehow the undercurrent of disapproval came across stronger over the phone. “He is in his lab with Dr Banner.” 

“Any prob if I interrupt?” 

“On the contrary, Ms Lewis,” which Darcy took to mean, _you go girl_. 

So, after a nod across at Jane (which received two thumbs up back), she went. 

Tony was thrilled to see her. “Hey sweet cheeks, glad to see you on board. Got a work station set up for you over there. Just settle in and get to grips with the toolset. It’s sweet, even I do say so myself.” 

Darcy stood, one foot flat on the ground, the other with the toe against the ground. She tilted her head sideways, looked Tony down and up, and spoke. “Nope,” with the p well and truly popped. Tony tilted his own head to match and knotted his brows. 

“Nope?” 

“Nope. You got this all backwards. I don’t work for you.” 

“ _Technically_ , that’s true…” Tony began. On the other side of the room, Bruce abandoned his expression of pained neutrality and turned to watch. 

“Nothing technical about it,” and Darcy shrugged. “Your ass is mine, Tony Stark.” 

Tony’s smile turned into a filthy smirk. “That’s a tempting offer, and you’re a fine piece of ass, not to mention rack, but I’m in a relationship.” 

“Okay, let me put it this way. I own your ass, Tony Stark. You are not my boss, I am yours. Now, I’ve got a shit-load to do, so we’ll start out slow. The first month, we’re just going to concentrate on keeping you alive. I bring you food, you eat it. I tell you to leave the lab, you leave it. I got over-ride access so you mess about, I lock you out. Outright mutiny, I call in Pepper. Questions?” 

Tony was sitting with his mouth open. Bruce’s eyes were wide and his mouth was twitching suspiciously. 

“Cool. We’ll start on Monday. Laters!” She sashayed out the door, got into the elevator and sagged in relief. Behind her she could hear Tony asking _what the fuck just happened_ , with a low undercurrent of Bruce chuckling.

* * *

On Saturday morning Thor brought the cat down to the common room as usual. They went in silence, the cat planning his explorations, Thor doubtless engrossed in thoughts of rutting with his mortal. 

Thor entered the room then unexpectedly stopped. He paused, his face undecided, then abruptly turned and left the room. The cat watched his exit curiously then heard the smallest noise: the turn of a page. 

Quietly he crept across the room. Darcy was sitting in a corner, back to the early morning sun, reading. The light behind her shone through her hair, giving her a golden halo.

He did not stop to consider. He not fight the urge to run to her. Loki dropped all control to allow the cat to leap onto the couch, to jump straight onto the book and rub his face against hers. He allowed himself to be lost in the scent of her and the warmth of her arms. 

_How could he blame the beast?_ was his last coherent thought as he found himself hypnotized by her heartbeat. _She was, after all, so very easy to need._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TUMBLR! [Cat being kissed](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/112539831082/marquisdedark-mymmm-a-new-chapter-is-up-on), [cats and reading (don't mix)](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/112539382337/catsbeaversandducks-cats-who-have-no-intention-of) and [a cat confused by a butterfly](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/112539634387/kewkitty-kitty-does-not-know-what-to-do-with-the). (Lokitty has no idea how like that cat he is.)


	19. Cat and Mouse

Tony worried her. Jane had been obsessed but rational - once Darcy had the facts, Jane could be convinced that it was better to eat or sleep or let the problem rest for a while. Tony? Not so much. She'd come in on Monday only to find he'd been working the whole weekend. Bad start Lewis. 

"After sleep deprivation for twenty four hours you're impaired as much as someone over the legal limit for alcohol. You've been awake almost forty eight." Science. That always worked on Jane. 

Tony didn't even look up. "Sweet cheeks, there were days in my life when it took half a bottle of scotch to get me out of bed. Being anywhere _close_ to the legal limit for alcohol, that was a good day." 

Darcy narrowed her eyes. Fine. She wrote a note on her clipboard and waited. Bruce was watching, even more serious than usual. His support of her attempt to get Tony out of the lab hadn't helped at all. 

She watched until she saw the signs, hands fumbling rather than working, head nodding, eyelids drooping. Quick as a flash, she slipped the note on the workspace. 

"Tony!" 

"No need to shout, sweet cheeks, I'm right here." His sarky tone sounded wide awake. He turned his head to look at her. "Not that you aren't ornamental an' all, but don't you have anything else to do?" 

"What's that note in front of you?" Darcy asked more quietly. 

She watched him read it. _That was a microsleep. You didn't even notice. At the wrong time you could cut your freaking hand off you bonehead._ The corner of his mouth turned up. 

"Touché, your highness. Okay, if it means so much to you I'll get some shut-eye." He turned to Bruce and swung off a salute. "Time to hit the road, big green. Be seeing you." He stumbled a little as he stood up, but walked straight and sure to the elevator. Darcy followed him. 

"I'm making sure you don't get lost," she told him when he turned with eyebrows raised. She walked him into the penthouse and up to his bedroom door. 

"Worried I can't take my clothes off?" and there it was, the smuttiest, dirtiest shit-eating grin Tony possessed. 

"Jarvis, has he got tech in there?" 

"There is a tablet by the bedside, Ms Lewis." She marched in, removed it, then held the door open. 

"Bed. Now. Sleep. Don't make me come in there." 

"That's what she said," and the shit-eating grin was still there. 

"Seriously? Get in there!" and she gave him a small push through the door. 

She sat outside, listening to the soft noises, then the silence. 

"J?" she whispered. 

She felt her phone vibrate. A message from Jarvis: "Sir is asleep. I will watch him and alert you if your assistance is required." 

She left the penthouse, pulling the door closed behind her. In the elevator the AI spoke again. 

"Thank you, Ms Lewis." 

"Just doin' my job, J." 

* * *

It was basically a game of cat and mouse. Tony somehow thought that the laws of nature didn't apply to him, that he could just keep going without food or sleep. She didn't even really know how bad it was. Bruce was a sensible person who didn't think he was indestructible and actually looked after himself, so he couldn't tell her exactly how long Tony worked, and Jarvis couldn't because Tony wouldn't let him. Both the human and the AI were concerned though, she could smell it. 

Two days later Thor was leaving the lab when Darcy was entering it. She glanced up then caught him by the arm. "Jeeze Thor, what happened to you?" 

His smile down at her was not dimmed one iota, despite the skin around his eyes being red and the whites bloodshot. "Darcy! Have you come to rule Tony Stark with a rod of iron? I was just Assisting the Science Bros with an Experiment." Darcy loved how Thor capitalized words in conversations. The stab of affection came with a side order of annoyance. 

"Well I wasn't, but I'm going to now," Darcy returned, hand still on Thor's arm. "Do not move." She looked around the lab and spotted Tony underneath something that looked like it belonged in "Flash Gordon" - the 30s version not the 80s one. She raised her voice. "Tony Stark, you god-damn maniac, have you been researching on my friends?"

"It's for the good of humanity," came the yell back from under the conical dohickey. 

"Can't you ensure good for humanity _without_ researching on my friends? You are such an ass."

Tony leaned out at that, grabbing a cloth and wiping his fingers. "Can't blame me this time, your highness. It was Bruce's project." Bruce threw an exasperated look across at him. 

"Don't worry, Bruce, I'm not going to shout at you," Darcy said, a little more softly. "Cause I still blame Tony," she said more loudly. "Though...would you like it if Tony made an anti-you weapon?" 

"He already has," Bruce said dryly. 

"You helped," Tony pointed out. 

"If I recall correctly, you had gone through two major versions first." 

Darcy was watching the conversation, Thor's arm warm under her fingers, his amused chuckle telling her he wasn't seriously hurt. Tony looked bright and alert, so unlikely to kill himself with exhaustion just yet. He must have napped at some point. "Do you make weapons against all your friends? Serious trust issues, dude." 

Tony looked at her, lips pursed. "I'm working on an anti-iPod-Queen missile _right now_. Wanna help out?" 

"Haha," she returned, "You said I'm your friend. No take-backs!" She grinned and wrinkled her nose at him. He shook his head and rolled his eyes.

"Can I get back to work now, Princess?" 

She tossed the brown bag onto the floor beside him. "Eat this first." He opened the bag and considered it, then pulled the sandwich out and took a big bite. Co-operation! Yay! 

"I'll drop in later." Darcy pointed two fingers at her eyes and then back at him as she left the room with Thor. 

She went over to the medical supplies and pushed Thor down onto a seat. He complied, amused, like a lion being bossed around by a mouse. She peered in his eyes. "Does it hurt?" 

"It does not hurt, Darcy." Thor sat patiently, a small smile on his face as she got the eyedrops and made him tilt his head back. "When first assailed by the mist, I was indeed in pain and unable to see. But those of Asgard heal quickly. You need not be concerned." 

"Yeah, I'm looking after my own skin here, big guy. I don't want you telling Jane I didn't even try and help you." She put in the drops and stepped back. His eyes looked less red. She chose to believe it was her skills and not his freaky alien healing. Go Darcy! 

"I would protect you from her wrath," and go Thor with the comeback! Though it reminded her of something that was niggling her. 

"So if I tell her I'm seeing Salem on Saturdays, you'd have my back?" She watched the grin fade and wondered for the zillionth time why they were both so weird about the cat. 

"You haven't told her, right? I'm pretty sure you saw me." Thor was looking uncomfortable, a lot more uncomfortable than he had with burning eyes. This really needed to stop.

"Why haven't you told her? That's not cool," and yeah, okay, she hadn't told Jane neither, but she wasn't (a) bumping uglies with her or (b) being let in on the big picture. So. 

Thor nodded slowly. "I have not. I had not intended not to, yet I have not told her." 

"Why? What's the big deal?" 

Thor rubbed his hair the wrong way, like Darcy's little nephew did when caught out, then looked directly at her, blue eyes sincere. "I love my cat dearly. He is...not himself. I had hoped bringing him here would heal him. Yet none have truly helped him but you. Jane's concern is all for you. Mine is ever divided." 

Darcy's brow was tensed. "That's nice I guess, but isn't Jane more important?" 

Thor sighed. "You make me ashamed Darcy. She is." A big hand came out and took Darcy's small one. "As are you. You are as a sister to me. I would never see you put in danger." 

Darcy was still totally confused. This was all getting totally too deep for a conversation about cuddling a cat in the common room on Saturdays. She shrugged it away. 

"Look Thor, I'm going to tell her. It's cool. Don't worry about it." 

* * *

Darcy had argued. Jane had finally given way. Darcy was still utterly confused. 

"They are way too intense about you," she told the cat, who was lying on his back on her legs the following Saturday. "Like, with Thor I guess it could be an Asgard thing, but Jane? Just too weird." 

The cat watched her face. It was amusing to watch her think, as she chewed her lip and the blue eyes grew distant and thoughtful. He batted her hair and her eyes came into focus, with the look in them that he enjoyed seeing. 

"Still, at least I get time with my sweetie, huh? Only time I'd probably get anyhow." 

Her eyes went distant again. The cat squirmed on her knee until her hand started slowly stroking his side. 

"Something's wrong with Tony. Like, I've seen intense. Jane working on the wormhole after Thor left, that was intense. But Tony...it's like it's life or death." Her eyes refocused. "You know?" The cat mewed and Darcy switched to stroking his other side. Then she shrugged, picked up the cat and cuddled him against her chest. "I'm glad I've got you to talk this over with," she said. "It's like you really understand what I'm saying." 

The cat purred, rubbing his face against her collarbone. 

"Jeeze, why can't people just be straightforward?" Darcy asked the cat. "They make it all so complicated, and it doesn't have to be." 

Even Steve, for crying out loud. Or was she the one making it complicated? He seemed happy, just hanging out, watching movies, kissing on the couch...but that was as far as it got. It felt like after the holidays they'd got stuck at a level and stopped moving. It's not that she objected to being friends, exactly, it's just she wanted to know if that was all it was. It sucked. 

She was going to have to make him talk about it, wasn't she? That sucked even more. She was literally going to have to pin him down for that one. For a soldier, he sure hated conflict. 

* * *

The cat had no answer to the mortal's question. He had never been straightforward in his life, as Aesir or cat or...whatever else one wished to call him. 

He was amused, even a little impressed at Darcy's attempted rule of Tony Stark. When with her the cat might be relaxed and playful, but when apart, he had much more in common with Tony than with Darcy. The desire to investigate the vents consumed him now. He rarely returned at lunchtime, preferring to use the hunger to push himself, then return to gulp down the food. His eating cycle adjusted quickly, but the appetite to explore did not. He could feel it burning inside him, a quest for he knew not what. For freedom, for knowledge, for something he needed more than food.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO, took ages to think of a title for this chapter, and then Darcy just said "cat and mouse". So thank you Darcy! 
> 
> There is a transition coming up in this little fic that has GROWN to a ridiculous size, so when we get there I'm thinking of splitting off into a new fic. Thoughts? 
> 
> And the Tumblr links. [It was long since I had longed for anything and the effect on me was horrible](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/113345504112/beckittns-featuring-krapps-last-banana). Also  
> [best friends](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/113345598902) (very Lokitty and Darcy), and [gorgeous cat art](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/113345430202/asylum-art-spooky-watercolor-and-ink-cats).


	20. Curiosity...

It was all about shifting tactics. Today Tony was leaning back in his chair, so Darcy took the opportunity to stop for an instant, draw a breath through her teeth then carry on into the room. 

Tony noticed immediately. "S'up Princess?" His eyes dropped to the bag held loosely by her side. "Lunch time already?" 

Darcy gulped a little. "Yeah, I guess." As she put the bag on the desk in front of him, Tony put his head to one side and smirked cheekily up at her. "Hey Princess, why the long face?" 

She put out her lower lip and shrugged. "If I say anything you'll only snark or think I'm trying to make you do stuff. So I'm zipping it. Meatball sub from the deli in Queens. Enjoy." 

She turned on her heel, only to find DUM-E barring her way. 

"Hey Dumster, Darcy's got places to be." For a bucket of bolts, DUM-E had pleading puppy eyes down to a fine art. Impressive given he didn't exactly have eyes. 

"Hey," said Tony behind her. "He's curious. I'm curious. Bruce's curious. So spill." 

"For the record, I'm not curious," Bruce said softly. No-one paid attention. 

Darcy dodged left, dodged right but whatever DUM-E's flaws as lab assistant, blocking was not one of them. "Fine," she huffed, spun back on her heel and blew her hair up off her forehead in seeming frustration. "Fine. Remember, you wanted this. You're a good-looking guy, Tony." 

Tony's eyebrows rose slowly into his hair. "O....kay." The smirk was back. "The sky is blue. The Hulk is green. Like, if today is stating the obvious day..." 

Darcy went on as if he hadn't spoken. "But...you've been skipping the gym, right?" She waved a hand around her torso. "And it shows. And it's a damn shame to see a good body go south. That's all. Can I go now?" 

Tony's brows had come down over his eyes during her speech. "You're saying I'm going to seed? That's what you're saying. That's ridiculous, Princess." 

Darcy shrugged, looked at his midriff and winced slightly. "Hey, you know when you last went to the gym. I'm just calling it like I see it." Darcy also knew when Tony had last been to the gym. She'd asked JARVIS for an update before she'd got Tony's lunch. 

Tony pulled out the sub, took a large bite and swung on his chair. "Hey Princess, if it makes you happy I'll hit the gym right after this. Gotta keep the boss happy, amirite?" Darcy carefully did not look at his other hand checking his midriff. 

"Hey, it's your call. I'll drop down later." This time DUM-E let her go. 

Three hours later when she was making coffee in the common room, Bruce walked in. "That was shameless," Bruce told her. 

Darcy grinned. "Did it work?" 

Bruce narrowed his eyes and shook his head, but his lips were compressed as if he was hiding a smile. "Oh, it worked. " 

Darcy grinned wider, took a slug of coffee, then gave Bruce a serious look over the rim of the mug. "JARVIS said Tony's only started cutting back on the gym since the holidays." 

Bruce eyed her cautiously, then turned to pour hot water into his cup. "That'd be about right. He was injured, so..." 

"Yeah, but normally, he'd be back by now, right?" Bruce didn't bother to ask how she knew that. Darcy and JARVIS were hand-in-virtual-glove. He sighed and picked up his cup, trying to avoid her appealing eyes. 

"Probably, but I don't know for certain. I can't tell you anything Darcy. I'm sorry." 

Darcy shrugged. "Hey, I'm sorry too." She felt bad for putting that hunted look on Bruce's face but she needed information. 

* * *

On Saturday Tony wandered into the common room, strolled to Darcy's favourite corner then stopped short. Darcy was sitting as usual, sun pooling warm on her back, the sun making her hair into a halo. That is, all her hair except on the top of her head, where soft black fur shifted and turned a single green eye towards Tony. 

“Hey Princess. You’ve, you know...” Tony swirled his finger around the crown of his head ““something on your head.” 

Darcy moved her head very slowly from her book to look at him. “Do I?” The cat shifted a little more to direct his full gaze at Tony. 

The corner of Tony's mouth quirked up. “Yes, Princess. Why do you have a cat on your head, Princess? Lost your crown?” 

“This is not a cat.” The cat’s eyes met Tony’s and Tony had the distinct impression that if the cat could shrug, he would have. “This is fashion. This is the hot new hair accessory for 2013. Out of touch much?” 

"Tony Stark is never out of touch," Tony eyed the cat as the green eyes turned away and the cat shifted forward to look back at the page Darcy was reading. Darcy kept her attention focused on Tony, with only a twitch of her mouth betraying her amusement. Tony straightened up as if to leave. "But hey, question answered. That's Pep's gift for Valentines Day." 

The twitch died. "Don't you dare," Darcy said quickly, with a jerk to her head that had the cat slide back for an instant before he recovered. The cat chose to glare at Tony as he righted himself on Darcy's head. 

"What should I get then, Princess?" Tony flopped into the facing chair, legs on one arm, body braced against the other. "I'm banned from alcohol, food and giant fluffy toys. Oh, and anything alive." 

"Thought you were super-smart," Darcy said, with a touch of snark. 

"Man's gotta know his limits," Tony returned, and put his finger to his lips in faux consideration. "Now _who_ told me that. I'm _sure_ it was someone around here..." 

The cat felt Darcy's head tilt slightly as she thought, then shake a little, as if amused at an idea. He huffed a little, eyes never moving from the book, ears twitching as he listened. 

"I know what Pepper would _love_. She's coming here for three days around Valentines, right?" Tony nodded. "So, what she'd _really_ like is you." 

"Yeah, not sure regifting is a good move, Cupcake," Tony replied. "Since she," and he made airquotes, "gave me to you." 

"I mean, you take three days off, spend 'em with her." Tony's mouth opened in protest and Darcy went on regardless, cutting off what he had to say. "Yeah, I know your work is important but so is Pepper, right? That's why you're asking me. And that's what she'd want. She loves you. She misses you. Give her a measly ninety-six hours. Not even, more like seventy. Seventy-five tops." 

"Angling for time off?" Tony had a mutinous look on his face. 

"Dude, I've got a ton of work piled up. I'm _never_ getting time off again." 

"Sucks to be Steve, huh?" His quick eye caught the downward turn of her mouth before she turned it into a smirk. 

"Way to make a girl feel good about herself. Try not doing that when you're taking time off with Pepper." 

Tony pouted. "I'll take it under consideration." He watched as her eyes fell back onto the page she was reading. “Whatcha reading Darcy?” 

“Jeeze, can’t a girl get any peace around here?” She threw up a grin, and rotated the cover so Tony could see.  


“Machiavelli? Do we want the fuzzball getting ideas?” 

Darcy looked at Tony with pity on her face. “He’s a cat, Tony.” 

* * *

“So how are things with you and Darcy?” 

“We’re on a mission.” Steve's tone was even and authoritative, but Natasha could see the amusement in the set of his jaw and the slightly hunted angle of his eyebrows. Interesting. 

Natasha's eyes flicked around the inside of the troop transport jet, then back to Steve. “I noticed. So, how are things?” 

Natasha really didn't want the job of emotional support for the team. But despite the rumours on three continents, she was human. When Tony tried to pump her for information, it was simple to evade him, but more difficult to turn off her instinct to gather information. 

“They’re fine. She’s great.” Steve gave her a sideways look. "Is that okay? Can we concentrate on the mission now?" 

"Sure," and Natasha made a show of checking her guns, even though she had thoroughly checked them already. “You two looked like great friends at Christmas," she said, eyes and hands apparently totally focused on the weapons, voice casual and slightly abstracted, as if she wasn't really paying attention to what she was saying. 

The only sound was the metallic clicks as she checked the slides and the magazines. The movements were second nature leaving Natasha free to contemplate what she could see of Steve in her peripheral vision. He was too still, speaking of tension in his muscles despite his apparent relaxed pose. Even out of focus she recognized the tense brow and the forced smile. So something was wrong. And given the intensity of his reaction, he already knew that something was wrong, meaning almost certainly Darcy had told him so. 

The Black Widow returned her guns to their holsters and checked the equipment on her belt. She could sense the tension in Steve rising. Usually before an op she sat still, almost in a state of meditation. It was calming for her colleagues. Her movement was having the opposite effect. Finally he cracked. 

"If you've got something to say, you should just say it." 

She looked up, face automatically smooth with a hint of surprise, as if she had forgotten he was there. Steve sighed. "About Darcy and me." 

The Widow shrugged. "What more would I say? You are friends." The twitch at the corner of Steve's eye told her to a high degree of probability what Darcy had said to him. Darcy did not want to be just friends. The Widow leaned back, considered and took a shot in the dark. For the Widow, shots in the dark were always the most productive. "Like you and Bucky were." 

As she said it she turned away, to give Steve at least the illusion of privacy. But she caught the blank look, then an instant of shock spreading over his face before the mask of the good soldier fell down. He said nothing more to her back as he walked away 

That confirmed one hypothesis she had about Steve's past life and one surmise she had had about his present. She had left Steve and Darcy to make their own choices. She had surmised that they would be good for each other. She had also surmised that it was too soon for Steve to build a new romantic relationship. 

Sometimes the Widow hated being right. 

* * *

On Asgard he had lived a life unchanging in its rhythms for decades and centuries. Court life interleaved with research and exploration had its own pattern, as predictable as the movements of the shuttle when his mother wove her tapestry. War had another, exciting and erratic on the surface but as unchanging in essentials as Thor's self-aggrandising stories of it. 

Was it as recent as the announcement of Thor's coronation that all that had changed? The conspiracy to allow the Jotuns into Asgard had been the start of his life's evolution from order to chaos, from the consistent to the ever changing. And now, even as a cat, how often had the rhythms of his life been altered unexpectedly? 

Now he relaxed only when with her, enjoying what small time they had left. The rest was all focus, on keeping a facade, on exploring every nook of this place, of effort to find an advantage, however small. Much like his old life, in fact, though instead of paths between Realms he sought merely any way out or place to hide. All too soon Thor would bring the muzzle and take him away, Nords knew where. Somewhere hot and dusty, away from all he had come to know in the Tower. Unless, of course, he could alter that fate. He had altered fates before. 

And so it was with a sense of achievement that he looked through the vent into the small room, deep in the basement levels of the Tower. All he could see was a bank of screens, the lower ones partially obscured by a pair of feet propped on the desk, ankles crossed. Another figure moved between the vent and the feet, then was gone, allowing the cat an uninterrupted view. 

There was one advantage to being a cat. One got to know feet. One mystery, what the mission was that drew Clint away every day yet saw him return each evening, was solved. 

The cat mewed gently, then remembered Clint's hearing and mewed louder. The other figure returned and turned to the vent. Loki remembered that uniform well, though he did not recognise the SHIELD agent. "Holy crap, Barton, there's a cat in the vent!" 

The feet unfolded and disappeared from view to be replaced by Clint, walking smoothly and silently as always. He approached the vent and pulled off the wire cover. The agent opened his mouth as if to protest, then shut it as his shoulders sagged. Clearly he had learned that arguing with Clint was futile. 

"Hey DC," Clint said softly, rubbing the cat gently behind the ears. The cat studied his face, the narrowed eyes, the head held lopsided and realized with a jolt of surprise that it was not a look of suspicion but a look of concern. He should not be surprised - the archer always had had heart. 

"You doing okay, buddy?" and Clint was lifting him out of the vent and carrying him over to the screens. The other agent crossed the room again with an air of long-suffering. Clint perched himself on the chair, legs crossed, cat cradled in one arm and Clint's fingers back scratching the cat's ears. "If you're looking for me, you found me. If you're looking for her, she's right there." 

The nod of Clint's head directed the cat to a screen in the corner. There on the screen, shot from an oblique angle was Darcy, laughing at something out of shot. The other screens showed various views of the lab from which Loki had been shut out (was it truly only six months before?) 

The sharp joy he felt was for his discovery, for the possibility of something he could use. What else could it be for? He settled back into Clint's arms and watched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...killed the cat, information made him fat.
> 
> Writing from the plague pit, sorry for any mistakes! 
> 
> The "hair accessory" line is from Kat Dennings, whose instagram pic of her with her cat on her head (since deleted sadly) sparked off this fic! Been waiting a loooong time to get here!
> 
> Tumblr: [cute cat sketches](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/114780090257/emilenox-scanned-the-cat-collection-from-my), [cat asking to be petted](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/114780150937/thecutestofthecute-bucky-oh-bucky) and [boys and screens and cats are cool](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/114780658822/t-eddysheeran-ex-oh-ex-this-is-the-greatest).


	21. Lovecats

Steve was doing the thing where he slumped down a little and looked at his shoes and looked so sad your heart just broke a little at his sadness. The only thing that was worse was his brave smile. Then, you literally heard your heart shatter like a dropped glass. 

"I know everyone thought I needed to move on. Heck, I wanted to move on. But I can't give you what you need. I'm sorry. " 

Darcy got it, she really did. Bucky was dead and Peggy was ninety or something but for Steve their loss was still fresh. For months Steve had just been bottling up that loss and pain (and for added angst, guilt about not visiting Peggy), putting a label on it, putting it in a cupboard and hoping it would go away. _Wow, homsey metaphor Lewis._ And there was something about how Steve had told her that made her wonder if closets might also be involved. But whatever, not her business. 

And her heart wasn't broken or anything. She was disappointed, sure, because the pretty and the pecs and the all round really good guy. But Darcy had defences of her own. She didn't just fall for guys, not any more. That just led to excessive ice-cream consumption and ugly crying. Darcy preferred to take it slow. Well, the undying love part anyways. 

"Hey Steve," and _smash_ cos there was the brave smile, "You know, you haven't hurt me. I was pushing 'cos I wanted to know what this was. It felt like we were heading towards being just friends, and now I know that I'm totally cool with it." She twiddled a lock of hair and reconsidered. "Well not totally because I'm not a crazy person, but if you want to be friends, I'd like that." Steve was looking at her as if she was a saint or something, which just proved the guy had issues. She rolled her eyes. "Stop that!" A smack to the arm shook the worst of the you-are-too-good-for-me expression loose. "Who else am I going to rewatch Star Trek with?" 

"Tony might do it," Steve offered, the ghost of a sassy smile twisting his mouth. 

"Tony Stark can kiss my ass." 

Tony was being super annoying. He'd lain in actual wait for Steve and Natasha to come back from a mission just so he could ask them about Valentines Day and Pepper. You'd think a self-confessed genius would have realized that Darcy would message Natasha and Bruce _right away_ about her brainwave. They were the two Tony was totally going to go to if he planned to undermine Darcy's plan. If? WHEN. 

"He might be keen on that too," and there was definitely some sass reviving there. 

"Then he can kiss his own ass. Did I say thanks for backing up Nat when she said he should spend time with Pepper? Because you're right and he totally should." It was super cool that Steve overheard Nat using her mind games on Tony and butted in to agree with her, all on his own initiative. 

"Hey, it's the right thing to do. If I'd known that it was your idea I'd have given him what for. Anything for my best girl." He was just too damn cute to be true. He also needed someone to be his friend, and Darcy Lewis was ready to step up to the plate. Even if it meant lots of cold showers until it all settled down. 

* * *

"Any plans for Thursday?" Bruce was pouring hot water into his cup, as calmly as if cats high-fiving Clint happened every day. 

Clint's teeth flashed briefly. "Nope. On duty." He put his hand down low. The cat tapped it. 

Natasha leaned onto the counter, mug cupped in her hands. "Clint never takes time off on holidays." Her sidelong glance was not missed by Clint, who pulled a face at her. "It's kinda his thing." 

"Why?" asked Bruce. He looked back and forth between the two spies. Natasha looked blank. Clint held his hands up. 

"Something always goes down on holidays and hallmark days. Might as well be on duty. At least you know where you stand." 

"Does it?" asked Bruce, brow crinkled in thought. "The helicarrier didn't happen on a holiday." 

"Too soon, doc," but Clint didn't sound bothered. The cat leaned against him, and the archer scratched him under the chin. "Sides, you're wrong. That was Star Wars Day." 

Natasha caught the flash of confusion on Bruce's face. "May the fourth." 

"Ah."

"Then there's the alien invasion on Independence Day..." 

Steve looked up from the paperwork spread across the table. "Wasn't that a movie?" There was a hint of satisfaction in his tone that amused Natasha enough to purse her lips and look sideways at Clint again. He narrowed his eyes at her suppressed smile. 

"So was 'Die Hard' and look at last Christmas. Even Hollywood knows special days are points of weakness." 

"I see what you're saying." Bruce sipped and considered. "Isn't every day a special day somewhere? Won't you have to be on duty permanently?" 

"Phil would _love_ that," said Natasha, the corner of her mouth quirking up. 

"Nah, it's not every day," Clint said. "Just talking about what happens to me, so it's my special days. It's Barton's Law." 

"It's confirmation bias," Natasha said. 

"Just wait and see." Barton lifted his chin at her and tapped his nose. 

Bruce turned his head to hide his smile. "What about you, Steve?" he asked. "You and Darcy doing something?" 

Steve leaned back, just a touch too casually. "Darcy doesn't believe in it. She celebrates cheap chocolate day on the 15th. Sounds like my kind of day." 

Bruce's brow tensed and his eyes met Clint's. Then, in perfect sync, they both looked at Natasha. She was sipping her drink, attention all on Steve. "I knew I liked Darcy for a reason," she said, light and amused. "Romance is nonsense. Valentines Day is a holiday for children." 

Clint shrugged a little and returned to his high-five practice with the cat. He knew Steve's tells well enough to know there was something there, but he also trusted Natasha to know when to dig and when not to. Bruce, on the other hand, assumed that Natasha's reaction meant there was nothing more to it. If he had known there _was_ more to it, he would never have mentioned it casually to Tony back in the lab. 

* * *

"Go yourself." Jane was distracted. There was six weeks to go to the transfer to the new site. There were tests to be run, plans to be made, papers to be got into order and the junk to be shredded. Erik was making noises about moving on. She didn't have time to go out or to waste on Darcy trying to persuade her. 

Darcy sighed and rolled her eyes. "Look, me and Steve, we aren't a thing any more," she said, voice lowered. "So no, not going on a romantic date with him. Salt in the wound much?" 

Jane lifted her gaze from the papers from the first time and slowly focused it on her assistant, eyes wide and concerned. "Darcy, I'm so sorry." 

"Hey, that's life. But don't tell people, okay? Tony's all up in my face as it is." 

"He's going to know sometime," Jane said softly, and put her hand over Darcy's. 

Darcy shrugged. "Sure but not right now when he's a little nuts about taking three days off. Jane, he's crazy obsessed." 

Jane grinned. "So what? _I'm_ crazy obsessed." 

"Nope," said Darcy. "I _thought_ you were crazy obsessed. You were just normal, everyday obsessed. Though _now_ I'm starting to worry that you _are_ getting crazy obsessed, because why else would you pass up a romantic dinner with Thor that Tony is paying for?" 

"Darcy...," Jane started but Darcy wasn't finished. 

"And don't say it's about DC because I want him to stay over anyway." 

Jane's face fell. "Darcy, no." 

Darcy's eyebrows shot up. She leaned in, her voice still low but her tone intense. "Look, I don't know what the hell is going on with the cat and all. I don't care. But all I want to do on Valentines after just breaking up with Steve is to relax in my apartment and watch movies with a cat. Is that really too much to ask, Jane? Like, what's going to happen?" Her eyebrows started to turn up in the middle, eyes wide and plaintive. "Please, Jane. I need this." 

* * *

The cat had developed a routine. He still explored the hidden insides of the Tower, but invariably found himself in the secret room with Clint by the afternoon. 

"It's like you know when Darcy's in the lab," Clint told him. The cat chose to ignore that remark. He also refused to high-five Clint the rest of that day. 

He wandered back to the common room and waited quietly for Thor to appear. This latest Midgardian festival intrigued him. There was no festival on Asgard that would find some relinquishing their work while others ignored the event completely. More intriguing yet was Jane's sudden change of heart, meaning that he would spend morrow night with Darcy. It was most unaccountable. As so often before he regretted the loss of his speech, second only to the loss of his magic. A few well-chosen words and he was sure all would be clear. 

The soft footsteps he heard were not Thor's so he stayed still, unnoticeable unless you looked directly at him. The cat's interest was piqued when he saw who it was. Why should the owner of the Tower enter this room in such a stealthy manner? 

The couch behind which Stark crouched was well known to the cat. There was a slit in the fabric beneath and he had hidden in it more than once. He had wondered if it had a purpose - if Stark's behavior was any guide it seemed that it had. The cat watched and hoped for Thor's continued absence. 

For once, Loki's fortune held. Ten minutes later Stark had performed whatever task he had come to perform and left the room. Loki waited five minutes to ensure he was truly gone, then stalked over on silent feet, slid under the couch and into the secret slit underneath. 

It was full of papers. He pushed them with a paw, and while his knowledge of this Realm's "science" was less comprehensive than he would like, he could tell what they were. Blueprints. Some, if he was not mistaken, for repulsors much like those on the Iron Man's suit, though much larger. 

It seemed that some did not relinquish their work after all. 

The first thought that came to him was of Darcy. She had been pleased with her scheme. She had fought to protect it. She was so young. He could remember being young - of tricks and manipulation to try and get Thor to follow the wise course of action. He remembered the frustration when Thor blundered on his own way regardless. It was folly, perhaps, but he felt he knew how Darcy would feel if she saw this, even though Loki himself had long repudiated any duty of care for Thor.

As for himself, he did not care. If Stark dropped dead from overwork, Loki would not turn a whisker. 

Or, indeed, if rage was the death of him instead. A flood of joyous mischief filled him. 

The trick lacked finesse or even plausible deniability. It was pure devilment that led him to shred the paper, until he heard Thor coming and came out to meet him. 

* * *

The first Darcy knew of it was mid morning on Valentine's Day, when her phone lit up as she drank her fourth coffee of the day. "Hi J. What's up?" 

"I think you need to come to the common room Ms Lewis. Sir is...not happy." 

That was the understatement of the year. If you looked up apoplectic, Tony's face in the common room on February 14th 2013 would be right there. The moment she stepped in, he twirled to meet her, handfuls of shredded paper in his hands. 

"Where is he, Lewis? Where the fuck is he?" 

"Who?" Darcy tried to adopt a soothing tone and peered at the paper, trying to work out what it was. 

"Your fucking cat, of course. Look what it's fucking done!" He held out a handful of paper. Darcy had been deputised to destroy duplicate documents in preparation for Project Stargate's move to Eureka. She recognised shredded blueprints when she saw them. 

"I've had it. Thor was warned. That's fucking IT. That cat is GONE." 

He was too angry to notice the stillness on Darcy's face. 

"Why are there blueprints in the common room?" Her voice was very quiet, but it cut through Tony's anger like a hot wire through plastic. The room was silent except for the tiny sound of small pieces of paper fluttering to the ground. 

"Tony?" Tony's blank face twisted into hurt, his eyes closing, before he turned to face Pepper. She was standing next to the kitchen counter, every hair perfect, her casual grey top and trousers neat. The contrast with Tony's hair on end and ratty jeans could not have been greater. Her eyes swept the details of the scene. "What's going on?" 

"If I said nothing, would you believe me?" Tony's mouth tried to twist into a sardonic smile, but failed. 

Pepper walked into the room, slowly. She looked from Tony to Darcy and back again. 

"Darcy, I'd like to speak to Tony in private, if that's okay?" It was absolutely okay with Darcy. If there was something she didn't want to be in the middle of, this was it. She heard the lock click shut as she closed the door. 

"Will it be okay, J?" she asked the ceiling. 

"Don't worry, Ms Lewis, everything is under control," said Jarvis. Darcy couldn't help but notice that he hadn't answered the question. 

Darcy looked unhappily at the closed door, shrugged, and headed off to waylay Thor. 

* * *

Pepper was saddened and disappointed, but perhaps this was the best thing that could have happened. At least he was talking. 

"It isn't your fault, Tony." 

He was sitting across from her, body tense and crouched over, elbows on his knees and fisted hands over his eyes. The fists came down and his eyes were red, and she wasn't sure why; whether it was exhaustion or tears or the pressure of his fists. With his hair on end he looked like a miserable child, and the sudden image she had of a five-year-old Tony stopping himself from crying made her throat ache. 

"It is, though." He spoke quietly, the words tumbling out quickly. "I made it, and put it here and did nothing to protect it." 

"Tony, that's not true." And it wasn't. There had been security in the building. They'd died in the assault on the Tower. Then she realized what Tony meant. He hadn't protected them. 

He must have seen it in her eyes. "No, I didn't. I just put it up, surrounded by people..." His voice broke off. She went on her knees to put her arms around the cage he had made of his arms. This time he let her. 

"If it hadn't been here, it would have been another power station. It's not your fault." 

"But it _is_ ," and he slammed his hand down and Pepper jumped. "People think I don't care, and they're _right_. I don't care enough. People died because of SI. They died because of me. The helicarrier came down because of _me_. You were almost kidnapped _because of ME!_ " 

His fists went back into his eyes. "'m sorry Pepper. I'm sorry. But I have to do this. I have to make it right." 

Her arms tightened around him. "But not like this, Tony," she whispered into his hair. 

* * *

Darcy had been a nervous wreck all day. She really had to tell Thor and Jane the whole story. They were less annoyed at Salem than she had expected. 

"These papers had been hidden to avoid _your_ scrutiny?" Thor had asked. 

"Yes, I guess," and if Darcy didn't know better she'd have thought Thor was pleased. 

She'd only spelled out the implications to Jane. "Don't worry, Darcy," Jane had said. "SHIELD have already approved Thor's move. We can move it up a little if we need to." 

"What if Tony pulls out of the project altogether?" Darcy wanted to know. 

"Pepper will sort it out," said Jane, with a confidence she didn't entirely feel. 

"Yeah, you're right. Sure she will," and Darcy wasn't entirely confident either. 

She hung out for an hour with them after work, only leaving when it was time for them to get ready to go out. She appreciated that. Alone in her apartment, one hand stoked Salem's head while she chewed at a hangnail on the other. Could she work with Tony now? Would he want to? Did _she_ want to? This was like an addiction or something, was she really helping? 

"Mew," and she looked down to see Salem looking up, as concerned as a cat can look. He placed a paw on her knee. 

"Hey, it's okay. Just worrying about something." 

He climbed up into her lap and snuggled close, purring. 

"It's kinda your fault, you know, but somehow...think you did the right thing, Salem." Salem looked up, then shifted onto his back into an undignified position, legs out in all directions, belly fully exposed. 

"Aw, _Salem_! Belly rub!" The cat viewed the wide grin that split Darcy's worried face with approval. 

She got the voice message late. She listened to it once, then picked up Salem and kissed him on the nose. 

"It's all okay, Salem! Job's okay, Thor and Jane are okay, you're okay! I think Pepper likes you!" The cat wrinkled his nose and sneezed. Darcy ignored it and kissed him again. 

* * *

It was, almost certainly, the last time he would sleep by her side. He had stayed awake as long as he could, drinking in her closeness, the scent of her body, the sound of her breathing. For once, he did not question himself, simply living in the moment while he could. 

The next morning he woke before her, before the morning alarm. He snuggled into her neck sleepily, and into his mind crept soft, sweet fantasies of raining kisses onto her neck and down her skin, of her gasps and gentle moans... 

Darcy stirred and turned over, breaking the cat's nuzzling contact with her neck. “Too early for kisses,” she said drowsily. “Love you,” and the cat was trapped in her embrace. 

He was disconcerted, yet captivated. He wanted her, yes but he wanted that too. He wanted her adoration. He wanted everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this is rubbish but getting no writing time at the moment :( 
> 
> Title from [this song](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/116636680377/the-cure-the-lovecats).
> 
> Anyhow TUMBLR! [cats with blossoms](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/116636367062/spastasmagoria-hakjfsdhf-spring-cats-flower) and [cats with flowers](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/116636190547/tearyplant-plant-blog), [hidden cats](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/116636215727/carry-on-my-wayward-butt-camo-cats) (that's Darcy's shower mat btw ;) and [cats making trouble](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/116636266762/oftaggrivated-i-had-a-friend-whos-cat-would). And of course, Clint's most important project this season, [high-fiving cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/116636314887).


	22. Catastrophe

It was a little awkward visiting the lab the next day. If Bruce had been there it might have helped, but he wasn't. She'd asked Tony how he was, Tony had said fine, and then the silence stretched out. 

Tony broke it. "Jane and Thor went to dinner instead of you," he said. He was sitting backwards on the swivel chair, arms folded on the back, swinging gently back and forth. 

Darcy shuffled her feet, then shook herself and looked him straight in the eye. "Steve and me, we're just friends, so...seemed a waste, kinda. Should have told you I guess." 

"It's all good." Tony swung back and forth a few more times. "I wasn't exactly telling _you_ everything." He swung a few more times, then drew in a breath. "Hey, you know I won't be around so much for the next few months?" 

"I heard." Darcy was waiting for the its-not-you-its-me speech. Rejected by not one but two Avengers. And they said April was the cruellest month. 

"I want you to stay on payroll. Working for me...with me...whatever," he said, and there wasn't a trace of mockery in his face or voice. "I know I'm not easy to deal with but...start again?" He batted his eyelashes and looked up appealingly. "If not for me, for Pepper?"

"Sure," and Darcy breathed out and ventured a smile. Tony stopped swinging long enough to stick out a fist. She bumped it, very business-like, and without glancing at each other each exploded their fists like a firework. Their eyes met and suddenly they were laughing and it was all cool again.

As she turned to go, Tony cleared his throat. "And tell the fuzzball I won't skin him after all. Pepper wants to thank him."

* * *

Over the next four weeks Loki developed a working strategy. 

It seemed that JARVIS' sight extended only to the rooms, not to the spaces between a ceiling and a floor above it; an oversight by Stark of which Loki would take full advantage. He had found spots of varying comfort in the network of ducting where he could rest, scattered so he could move between them and be more difficult to find. His physical needs were more of a problem - he did not relish the prospect of squatting in the dirt like an animal, appropriate as that might be to the shape he wore. Yet concerns about his personal fastidiousness would be moot if he could not eat. Stark's surveillance might be less than complete, but the vermin control was not. The cat continued to explore the building daily in the hope of finding an accessible source of food. Even if no solution was found he was determined that when the day came that Thor would plan to put the muzzle on the cat, Loki would be gone. Loki would not be brought to and fro like luggage, as if he had no will or wish of his own. He would happily starve first. 

Now time was getting short. The deadline for the move to the desert was two weeks away. This weekend there had been no lazy time on Darcy's lap in the common room despite the fact Tony was away practically all the time. Jane had flown out to the site on Friday, half her scientists accompanying her. This morning, Thor had left to join her. Although it was Sunday, and apparently another day of festival, Darcy was in the lab going through papers. 

The cat had made a cursory exploration of the vents, then joined Hawkeye, living up to his name in the secret room watching the lab. The cat sat and licked his fur and analysed the sense of unease that had settled on him this morning. It was not, he thought, the change of routine. It perhaps had something to do with the sense of change coming, unstoppable. It might even relate to the triviality of seeing so many inexplicably dressed in green. Loki had never been superstitious, but if he had been he would have suspected the Norns were trying to get his attention. 

He shook his head to dislodge such profitless thoughts, and focused on the screens. Darcy was moving boxes, and as she turned he saw the t-shirt she was wearing: vivid green, with "KISS ME" in large white letters on the front. The feeling of unease clamped down again as she moved away, vanishing off that screen and reappearing on another. 

"What's up?" and the cat realized Clint was studying him, head tilted, eyes slightly narrowed in half-concern, half-calculation. Their eyes met, the cat contemplating the question, moving his awareness out of the swirl of his thoughts to the tips of his whiskers and the points of his claws. Why assume the sense of impending doom was a fancy? It had not been so with the storm. 

It was then he identified it, the faintest buzz on the very edge of his hearing. His eyes widened. He saw Clint's eyelids flicker, and for an instant he had the sense of being in battle, silently scouting. Words had not been needed with Sif or the Warriors Three and they were not needed now. A touch to his ear with his fore-paw and Clint understood. 

"Hey, O'Reilly," and Clint turned to the SHIELD agent in front of the other bank of screens. "Do you hear anything?" 

"I hear a pint calling me," said O'Reilly, arms folded and dark brows drawn down theatrically over blue eyes with impossibly long lashes. "So much for the luck of the Irish." 

Clint grinned, then looked up. "JARVIS, you got anything?" 

"Agent Barton, nothing is coming up on normal frequencies." 

"Try higher. Something a cat might be able to hear." 

"Analysing...." a pause and then, "Yes, high frequency, volume low but increasing. Agent, it appears to have started four hours ago." The AI was never apologetic but there was a hint of it in his next words. "Triangulation suggests the TTD is the source." 

"Power?" 

"There is substantial power drain from the arc reactor, but within approved limits. Dr Hamilton confirmed there would be testing today." 

"Worth checking out," Clint said, glancing at the cat, whose ears were twitching, and then at O'Reilly. Unless in the case of emergency, Clint was not to go into the lab, a guideline instituted after Erik saw him and almost had a breakdown. 

"Guess I'm up then." O'Reilly's flippant tone was belied by the controlled way he stood up, suddenly alert as if someone had flicked a switch. "With any luck the doodad is on the fritz and they'll shut up shop." 

He held his palm to the door scanner and exited. Hawkeye settled back, eyes flicking between the screens, scanning for any anomaly. The cat, tail and ears still twitching slightly, stood at his elbow. The sound was clearer now to the cat's ears, an high-pitched buzzing that made his skin crawl, a sound that suggested an infestation of flies was swarming nearby. 

On the screen O'Reilly appeared and approached the senior scientist. They spoke for a moment, too quietly for the cameras to pick up, then the scientist led O'Reilly to the far corner where the equipment stood. He moved a partition, looked closely and then stood up abruptly and spoke over his shoulder. "Hamilton, the machine appears to be active." 

Another scientist lifted her head, typed into her keyboard then shook her head. "I'm not seeing anything here other than diagnostic tests." She got up, tucking her hair behind her ears and then sticking her hands deep into the pockets of her long cardigan as she walked over. The first scientist leaned over the equipment, pointing something out. O'Reilly moved to the side to make way for the other scientist, attention focused on the machine. 

Hawkeye saw before Loki did and pressed the comm button. "O'Reilly! Six o'clock!", but it was too late. O'Reilly turned just as the woman behind him pulled the trigger of the gun held to his head. The sound of the shot briefly overpowered the buzzing in Loki's ears. A spray of red rained on the senior scientist as he turned, shocked, only to fall in his turn, a bullet hole blooming between his eyes. There were two other scientists in the room; they remembered their training and ducked down. One ducked too slowly, a shot ran out and he too lay still. 

Loki took this in in an instant as he turned to the screen where Darcy had been. His heart thumped painfully when Darcy was no-where to be seen. An instant's scanning revealed her, moved to the extreme far end of the room, taking cover between two filing cabinets. 

"Fuck!" said Hawkeye and thumped the desk with his fist. He pressed a button and on-screen the lights flickered off, to be replaced by emergency lighting. "JARVIS, evacuate the building. NOW. Then initiate alert alpha alpha 1." He touched his ear and turned his focus to the mouthpiece. "Code Red, I repeat, Code Red. Lockdown initated. O'Reilly and two civilians down. Hamilton has been compromised. I repeat, Hamilton has been compromised." 

The woman, Hamilton, went back to the machine, and looked up into the camera that monitored it. She was pale, the blueish pallor contrasting with her yellow blonde hair and the dark rings under her eyes. Hawkeye drew in a sharp breath, and the cat felt his hackles rise and his hair standing on end. It must have been a subconscious reaction, since the realization hit his consciousness like a blow an instant later. 

In Loki's mind, all at once: the agent Hamilton looked just as Barton had when controlled by the sceptre. The device to travel between Realms was active. Thanos was coming. The conclusion did not follow, failed every rule of logic, but carried absolute conviction all the same. Thanos was coming, Thanos would soon be here. 

"Agent Barton, the TTD is drawing power at an escalating rate. I cannot turn it off." 

It was the strangest thing, the feeling of sickness in Loki's head but absent from his body. He could almost taste the bile that should be in his throat. All that was submerged when the next realisation hit, one that brought terror and anger to his mind and made his body arch and spit. Thanos' creatures would build a path of blood and dust to Asgard and the Realms beyond. That path would start in the room where Darcy hid. 

The buzzing was now drowned out by roaring, the sound of his blood in his ears. Dimly he heard Hawkeye speak. 

"Try harder!" A press of the comm button. "Hamilton, the room is on lock-down." From the corner of his eye Loki saw a scientist cowering behind a desk on-screen slump in despair. "You can't win, Hamilton. Deactivate the device and talk." 

"I can't win," Hamilton hissed, "But that doesn't matter. Only the Mission matters." She raised the gun, fired and the screen went black. 

Hawkeye clicked off the comm. "Great," he commented. "JARVIS?" 

"I am still trying, Agent. Evacuation should be complete in ten minutes. Sir is en route. SHIELD report Agents Romanoff and Rogers are otherwise engaged. I cannot contact Prince Thor." 

"Try Jane Foster's cell," Hawkeye commanded. "Banner?" 

"I'm here," and Bruce Banner was coming in the door O'Reilly had so recently used. "JARVIS wouldn't tell me..." and he broke off to stare at the cat. "What's wrong with him?" 

"The cat," said Hawkeye grimly, "has a good handle on the situation. My gut tells me it's an alien incursion via Foster's device. Initiated by a single operative. This floor is about to be sealed. JARVIS is evacuating the building. SHIELD will take the perimeter. Looks like we're on our own." 

Bruce seemed to grow ever more calm as he heard the worst. He gave a quick nod as Hawkeye finished. "What do you want me to do?" 

"I'm going in, going to try to take the operative down and shut-down the device. If we get an incursion, that's when you come in." 

"Jane won't like that," Banner commented. 

"Not our problem. Our problem is little green men," Hawkeye said, taking his bow. "JARVIS, initiate constant uplink to SHIELD," and Hawkeye headed for the door. "DC," he said, turning to the cat as he reached it, "stay here." He met Banner's eyes and shrugged. "Worth a try." 

The doctor turned to watch the screens, keeping his distance from the cat. It was an unnecessary precaution for Loki was himself focused on the screens, watching Darcy sitting, clearly thinking, characteristically chewing her lips. 

Never, _never_ had Loki felt so powerless. Not when falling for a seeming eternity into the abyss, for that he chose. Not in the dark pit that was the floor of the universe, not even when Thanos found him. What was happening now, he could do nothing to twist, to stop or to turn to his advantage. Then he had nothing to lose, and now... 

The final realization shattered his world, then rebuilt it. He had been lying to himself. His thoughts, his feelings, his actions were not the function of the narrow world he was in, nor the body in which he was imprisoned. Darcy mattered to him, so deeply and profoundly that he would rather die than live in a universe without her in it. Lie upon lie, because if she mattered, how dared he assert that mortals were worthless? _And what a marvellous time to discover this_ , a sarcastic voice in the back of his head said, _just in time to know the full depths of your loss and the heights of your guilt, as Thanos destroys her and her kind in their thousands and you stand and watch powerless. Assuming you survive._

All he could do was watch as on the screen Hawkeye emerged at the back of the room (a route that the cat had found and now too late knew its purpose), slipped like a shadow between the cabinets and knelt beside Darcy, putting his hand over her mouth to stop her exclamation of surprise. A few exchanged words, a nod and he moved on. Cover was sparse and the partition had been moved to block off the corner of the room where the machine stood. 

"Are you here yet, Barton?" Barton considered, shot an arrow and rolled. A bullet gouged a hole in the floor where he had been.

"I have all the cards, Barton." Another shot and the last scientist gasped, a red stain spreading across her shoulder. Barton could hear Darcy's muffled exclamation behind him. Both he and those in the control room heard the moans of the injured woman. 

"You have no one to shut down the TTD, Barton. Soon it will be too late. They will be here," and the buzzing in the cat's ears was now unbearable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because how weird must St Patricks Day seem to a guy for whom green is HIS color.
> 
>  ~~Tumblr links to come. Working on finishing this so no more cliff hangers!~~ \- From comments so far going to aim to get next chapter up asap! 
> 
> On Tumblr: [peace between Tony Stark and cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119754936427/copperbadge-iwantcupcakes-cat-lover-robert), this is [the lap-time Lokitty is missing](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119755126777/plebscout-good-morning-from-pamyu), scary [screen-time, even scarier when its real](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119755046477/georgetakei-i-haz-the-scares-source-awwww) and [when your heart leads you in a new direction](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119754884227/when-your-heart-leads-you-in-a-new-direction-new).


	23. A Lion in his own Lair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **TW: cat harm **  
> ****  
>   
>   
>   
>   
> From your comments I know there are a lot of cat lovers reading, some of whom have lost their cat friends. So be warned, there is serious cat injury ahead. Don't want anyone to get upset due to this fic.

It had sucked missing the parade, but Darcy reckoned there were worse things than listening to her Patty's playlist and packing most of the remaining files. It had got better when the hottie walked in, tall and dark and a SHIELD jumpsuit that clung to all the right places. He'd gone to talk to Frank and they wandered over to the machine. Darcy speeded up, concentrating on finishing so she could be at her desk when he left, singing along when the song changed on her iPod. "...Whatever gets you through the day..." There was only one box to be put in place, ready to move to Eureka. "Some time yesterday..." 

A shot rang out and Darcy turned to see the hottie hit the floor, Frank backing away terrified, Em (what the fuck? _Emma_?) aiming at him and firing, then turning. Mo and Tan were dropping down behind their desks, but Mo was too slow and another shot rang out and Darcy just couldn't look, just backed into the wall between the cabinets as _you don't have to be a hero_ played in her ears. Were they dead? Frank, uptight, kind Frank who brought in baked goods and Easter eggs cos his kids got too many; happy, laughing Mo who helped her with the coffee runs. Would Tan, serious Tan who never got Darcy's jokes, be okay? And Em? She liked Em. Em was funny and clever and thoughtful. Why was Em doing this to them? 

She sat, chewing her lips, deaf to the music in her ears, until a hand covered her mouth and she literally almost died right there, her heart pounding as if it would leave her chest. It was Clint. He took one bud out of her ear as a new song started. 

"Are you okay?" Darcy could only nod, Clint's calm voice somehow bringing down her heart rate, down to the speed of the drum beat playing on her stupid Patty's playlist on this stupid fucked-up day. 

"I saw what happened. I need to know: can you turn off the TTD?" He moved his hand away gently. 

"Yes, but I'd have to be at my desk," Darcy whispered hoarsely. 

"Off-site shutdown is inactive?" Clint's eyebrow was raised and Darcy was briefly impressed at his knowledge. 

"We disconnected it yesterday." Darcy's brow creased, seeing the connections. "Em did. She was supposed to disconnect the TTD today." She had to ask. "Is...how is everyone?" 

"I'm going to find out. Stay here until I tell you otherwise." She watched him move smoothly away, hope rising inside her. Then the lyrics of the song she was listening to kicked in. 

_Takes a second to say goodbye, say goodbye, oh oh oh._

Silently Darcy took the buds out of her ears and leant back against the wall, looking up sightlessly towards the camera watching her. 

* * *

Loki watched as she flinched at the gunshots that followed, oblivious to the pain in his head as the buzzing wiped out all other sound. He still had some little power. He might at least be a comfort to her, watch for danger, guard her to the small extent he could. All he needed was a way to get to her.

That came soon enough. "Banner," and that was Clint's voice over the comms, "rendezvous at Darcy's position." 

The cat did not relish going into the dark with Banner. The memory of what he could become was still clear. But as the doctor went through the control room door and into the passage just outside, Loki slipped like a shadow behind him. By the time Bruce had cautiously reached Darcy and Clint, the cat was in Darcy's arms. Clint threw Banner a look. 

"Sorry," Bruce muttered. 

Clint got down to business. "Hamilton's holed up. I'm going to get Darcy to her desk to disable the TTD. If the TTD is activated first, go Hulk. Stop anything coming though. Avoid damaging the machine." 

"Or I risk punching a hole in the space-time continuum, potentially causing global cataclysm," Bruce said. He looked between the faces, one shocked yet impressed, one blank and businesslike. "I'll be careful." 

"Salem?" Darcy asked. "Can we get him out of here?" 

"One impossible task at a time, Darcy," said Clint dryly. The cat had already fastened his claws into the hem of her t-shirt. 

The short journey to Darcy's desk was incredibly slow, inching along the walls trying not to become a target. The cat seemed to understand what was happening, looking around sharply, sometimes running ahead as if to test the route. The final stage saw Darcy waiting with Salem while Clint slowly flitted across the room to distract Emma Hamilton. When the second arrow flew, Darcy ran for her desk, Salem running by her side, expecting at any moment to feel a bullet. She got there and ducked underneath, mentally thanking Jane for putting her back to the wall facing the door and with a filing cabinet giving a little cover.

"Give up, Hamilton, and we can talk," shouted Barton, the signal to Darcy to count ten, grab her screen and keyboard and put them under her desk. Tucked away, she felt secure, but she knew it was an illusion. If anyone came looking for her she was a sitting duck. Once under the desk, the light showing that the machine had mains power. She plugged her iPod phones in to make sure it made no noise and booted it up. While she waited, she cuddled Salem and checked his head which seemed to be bothering him. 

The flash of light came unexpectedly. The gap under the desk was suddenly a white luminous line. Salem jumped off Darcy's lap and slunk around the desk, keeping to the shadows. 

Once activated, the infernal buzzing of the machine had stopped. Loki was familiar with the golden light of the Bifrost, flickering with rainbow colors. He clearly remembered the azure clouds the Tesseract summoned which cleared to show alien stars against velvet night. Jane's Trans-dimensional Transport Device projected light of a utilitarian, bland white, no more impressive than that of an florescent tube. Ten feet away, it broke into a swirling mass that reminded Loki of a galaxy in miniature, though moving infinitely more quickly. Despite himself, Loki admired the simple elegance of it. Unfortunately, it would work, and its very simplicity was what enabled others to hijack it and turn it to their own purposes. 

The weapons were the first things that appeared through the swirl, weapons Loki well remembered. He glanced away, looking for Barton, only to lock eyes with the Hulk, ambling through the room towards the machine. A shot rang out, but the Hulk shrugged it off. 

"PUSSY CAT," the Hulk rumbled, and Loki felt simultaneously terrified and relieved that the creature was on his side. Perhaps, just perhaps they might all survive this after all. Then the soldiers started coming though and the Hulk broke into a lope. 

On and on they came, swarming from the other side of the galaxy, two by two. Gray shapes, studded with machinery, reptilian yet somehow insect-like they came, quicker than Loki remembered or had expected. The Hulk dived into the mass, but he was avoiding the device as instructed and more creatures kept pouring in. Some fell to arrows, but more marched on. A scream ripped out only to be cut short - Loki could only assume that the agent Hamilton was no more. 

He retreated under the desk and watched Darcy, frantically typing with a crease between her brows. She glanced up, then back at her work. "Shit, shit, shit," she murmured. "I don't want to know what's out there, do I Salem?" No, thought Loki, you do not. You do not need to know that you are all that stands between us and destruction. 

He flattened himself to peer under the gap at the back of the desk. All he could see were advancing Chitauri. Barton, invisible, was firing, but there were many, far too many. The Hulk was deep in a mound of the creatures, pounding them underfoot. But enough, too many, were advancing on the main doors. Two had already started cutting their way though. 

Directly in front of him, two gray feet stopped. 

Behind him, Darcy sighed gently and pressed the enter key. 

The desk lifted and was gone, Darcy's back exposed to the Chitauri soldier, her green t-shirt proclaiming, "I'M IRISH". Time slowed down as Loki gazed up, unnoticed, saw the grimace on the nightmare face that suggested satisfaction and the lifted weapon. He tensed, pulling himself down against the floor, then launched himself into the air, straight at the creature, and heard Darcy behind him scrabbling away. 

At first he attacked with claws and teeth, but the beast was so foul Loki reverted to claws, scraping and rending without ceasing. He could not do this for long, but perhaps it would be long enough. He could hear the machine stop, he heard the roar of the Hulk and the swish of the arrows. Just a little longer, a little longer and Darcy would be safe. 

And then the creature had him, a tight grip around his middle almost cutting him in two. Suddenly he was flying. He hit the wall with a sickening crunch. The last thing he heard was Darcy's gasp, and before he blacked out he felt a deep despair. 

Darcy's gasp was all for Salem. She didn't even see the arrow that hit the creature between the eyes. She stood up and bolted to where Salem's body lay, back down towards the filing cabinets and the boxes where she'd been working so recently before. 

She kneeled there for a long time, looking at the black shape limp on the floor, too shocked to do anything or say anything. She was unaware that the battle had ended until she heard heavy footsteps beside her. To her left, the Hulk hunkered down. 

She couldn't feel afraid any more. She looked into his face, into the big brown eyes that still had something of Bruce in them. The big brown eyes saw she was sad, and started to look sad too. 

"PUSSY CAT?" A large green finger went out. Unthinking she put her hand out and stopped him. 

"Don't touch. Pussy cat is very sick," and she couldn't help her voice breaking on the last words. They sat in silence for a moment, his huge finger still in her hand. 

"PUSSY CAT SICK?" and then his face crumpled, and Darcy should have been terrified but she wasn't. She knew exactly how he felt. 

She let go of his finger and he stood, turning around, looking for something to pummel, to destroy. He started down the room, roaring in anguish, then an arrow flew out and he toppled, like an overtired child finally falling asleep. 

Clint appeared. "You talked to the Hulk," he said, apparently impressed. Darcy looked at him, then looked away, back at the cat. Clint's expression changed instantly to concern and sympathy. It was too much for Darcy. 

"He saved me," she said, and then finally the tears came, as Clint kneeled beside her and put his arm around her. 

* * *

He was still alive. 

"It's a miracle he's still with us," the veterinary surgeon said. "But he's not going to make it. The best and kindest thing would be to..." 

"We will watch with him," said Thor. JARVIS had finally reached him, but he arrived too late. The vet started to argue, but Tony intervened, leading her away. 

Tony arranged everything. The cat could not be moved, so Tony had the rest of the room sealed off for SHIELD to decontaminate. A tiny room was built around the cat, with a passageway leading to the secret entrance, all lined with plastic sheeting. When Darcy returned from decontamination, the room was ready. Tony paused as she started to go in. 

"Princess, if there's anything you need...?" 

Darcy had no words. All she could do was silently hug him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "A cat is a lion in his own lair" - Indian Proverb
> 
> Written very fast so sorry for typos! And yes, another cliffy, sorry.
> 
>  
> 
> Tumblr! The featured music from Darcy's playlist: [Whatever gets you through today](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119932543322/from-darcys-patty-playlist-all-irish-all-day) and [Seconds](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119932356362/from-darcys-patty-playlist-all-irish-all-day).
> 
> [Cats with the Egyptian Goddess of War](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119933033392/mythosidhe-sekmet-with-her-kitties-cairo), incredible [leaping cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119932741192/aleksandrwilde-jinxamataz). 
> 
> And consoling pics: [cute sleeping kittens!](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119932621487) [Kittens swimming in the bath!](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119932823727/meow-fuck-if-you-were-having-a-bad-day-here) The [best part of wrapped candy, for a cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119933276817/whyndancer-stubborndodecahedron-unmute-this)! [IT cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119933261557/awwww-cute-im-not-sure-the-new-it-guy-knows)! Everything is going to be fine!


	24. Dream Cat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who skipped the last chapter, Jane's device was activated and the Chitauri used it to invade. Clint and Hulk fought them off and Darcy shut off the device successfully but Lokitty was seriously injured trying to prevent Darcy from being attacked. 
> 
> For those who didn't skip, didn't want to put spoilers in the comments...so here's the next chapter!

The room was ghostly, Darcy thought. The small space was lined with opaque plastic sheeting which billowed where it was not fastened down. The secret door was open now, with a sheet of the plastic hanging over it. The misty whiteness was over her head, all around her, even on the floor, except where a hole had been cut out, so it could be laid without moving the cat. 

Without moving Salem. He was still there, unmoving. She sat there, unmoving, watching him. 

Thor had asked for candles, as if flammable wasn't a thing. Tony compromised: expensive electric candles which flickered even though the air was still. The pinpoints of warm light reflected off the sheeting. 

Thor sat facing the door. He had wept. Darcy wasn't used to guys crying. She would have been uncomfortable, but she was crying too much herself. Now he was calm, speaking occasionally to the body lying immobile in front of him. 

A rustle of the plastic sheet being drawn aside and Clint was in the room. He squatted between Darcy, who was sitting with her back to the door, and Thor. 

"I thought you would want to know," he said softly. "Tan is going to be okay. She's stable and resting. Mo is in surgery." He accepted Darcy's nod and went on. "How's DC doing?" 

"He has not yet moved," Thor said, his voice pitched low. Despite his sorrow, Thor still seemed hopeful. Darcy met Clint's eye and wished she could feel that way. Clint seemed to understand. 

"I'll be outside if you need me," and he straightened up. "Thank you for saving the world, Darcy." He was gone before Darcy could think what to say. 

Thor lifted his head. "You did not tell me of your deed of valour." 

"It wasn't. I didn't. I mean, I did, but I didn't do anything special. Just pressed a few keys." 

"Clint Barton thinks otherwise." Thor's eyes settled back on the black shape huddled on the floor. "I remember my first time in battle and it was a fearsome thing, even surrounded by companions. You were brave. You stayed, you stood alone and so doing you saved this world." 

"I wasn't alone," Darcy whispered. " _He_ was there. He was looking, all the time. He saved my life." And there, right on cue, the tears started again. She felt a large hand take hers. Thor had shifted to sit beside her. 

"And I feel joy that he saved you, my sister. We would have mourned, he and I and Jane and all here, if he had done otherwise." 

"But he's going to die!" The words felt to Darcy as if they were ripped from her heart. She looked involuntarily at Thor, half afraid that she had destroyed his simple faith that Salem could live. Thor was looking at her, his face unchanged. 

"Where there is life there is hope. So Jane said when I spoke to her." Thor longed to tell Darcy more, that his hope was not born of mere optimism but of knowledge that Darcy did not possess. "Did I not fall in battle, yet return?" 

"That was different," Darcy sighed. "I just wish I could do something, you know? I wish I could help." 

"Then speak to him," Thor said softly. "To know you are here and well, nothing could help him more." 

Darcy shifted self-consciously. Thor dropped her hands and looked away, knowing now, as he never had when younger, that for some speaking what is in their heart is not easy. Quietly he moved back to his place, fixed his eyes on what was and would always be his brother, no matter what his shape, and said no more. 

It was some time before Darcy broke the silence. 

"I'm here, Salem. Thank you for saving me." She paused for so long that Thor thought she had finished speaking. Her last words all came out in a rush. "I love you Salem. Please don't die! Please!" 

Thor had a lump in his throat as he gathered a weeping Darcy into his arms. 

* * *

It was difficult to breathe. It was impossible to move. Yet he could hear everything. 

She had asked him to stay and he was trying, he was trying so hard. His sight was dim, his body racked with pain but he could still smell her scent and hear the sound of her breathing. He clung to that slender thread, desperate not to let go, but he could feel it start to slip through his fingers. 

Her presence was a comfort and a gift. The last thing he would know would be her. Her and his brother. No more lies. 

Her scent faded as the darkness swallowed everything. Then he was falling into the dark, a dark where no lights shone, where there was no brother to catch him and no hope of a landing. But he could not regret the loss. His death would not be for nothing, for she and her world would live on. 

Suddenly, unexpectedly he was surrounded by light. Green light caught him and rocked him as if he had landed in water. The light flowed around him, flowed through him, and out through his eyes and his mouth. There was no fear, only joyous familiarity. _My magic, come to bid farewell_ he thought, rejoicing in its swirl about him, in a presence that had been denied him while in the shape of a cat. 

As if shaped by the thought, the magic swirled into the shape he knew well now, long whiskers and sharp claws, silent paws and flicking tail. He stared into the cat's eyes, dreamlike, and it stared back, then dissipated. The green was fading, the magic vanishing. Yet he was not afraid. As trusting as he had been when rocked by Frigga as an infant, Loki drifted and slept. 

* * *

She woke panicking. How could she have slept? All she could hear was Thor breathing, evenly and deeply. Gripped by fear, she turned her head, her neck stiff, and saw the dark shape close beside her. Cautiously she moved her hand near without touching and thought she felt warmth. Swallowing, she closed the small gap. The hair beneath her finger was warm, and he stirred, but it also felt _wrong_. What she felt was not the short neat fur of Salem, but long hair like a Persian's. 

She groped and found her glasses and put them on. Everything shot into focus and the feeling of _wrongness_ intensified. The hair was dark, but far too long for any cat. The shape was wrong. Uneasy, she inched back and realized what she was looking at. It was a head, but of a human, not a cat. Beyond a body shone dimly in the fake candlelight. 

She shifted back more, sat up then stopped transfixed. The head moved, turned, rose as the figure (he, definitely he) pushed himself up on his trembling arms and looked at her. _This is a dream_ , she thought. The man's eyes were the color of Salem's, a vivid inhuman green. 

He was gaunt yet gorgeous, like a prince released from enchantment in a fairytale. If they'd gender-swapped Sleeping Beauty in _Once Upon A Time_ , Darcy thought, they could have cast him. He was too thin, not so much zero fat as negative fat. She could swear she could see the shape of his veins though his skin. Yet his face was sharply beautiful, the skin stretched over tightly corded muscles glowed white and clean and the ebony hair about his shoulders was ragged and unkempt but soft. What really convinced Darcy she was in a dream was the smile he gave when he saw her, gentle and joyous, a smile you smile when you see a close friend or a lover. Darcy knew that she had never seen this guy before in her life. 

He made as if to move toward her, and Darcy wondered what kind of dream this was going to be because, whoa, the guy was completely and impressively naked. But somehow his body didn't seem to do what he wanted to. He looked down confused and suddenly froze, staring rigidly at his arms for a long minute. He lifted up his hand and stared at it and Darcy stared at it too: attractive like the rest of him, with elegant long fingers, pale and marked with thin scars. He had be a musician, she decided, looking back at his face, only to find his gaze had returned to her. 

He looked in her eyes as if searching for something, then the hand reached out. It felt momentous, as if when he touched her everything would change, as if there was still a spell to be broken. She watched his face, his eyes filled with a strange pleading, as his hand came closer and then ghosted against her face. 

She jumped, because she felt the touch, gentle and cool and dry against her skin, and because his eyes widened and she knew that he had thought it was a dream too. But it wasn't a dream. This was real. She jerked back, time suddenly speeding up. Through the roaring of blood in her ears she heard someone scream. It took a moment before she realized that it was her. 

A voice in the back of her skull gibbered warnings and nightmares. _Where's Salem_ , she thought and then screamed it in the strangers face. "Where's Salem? WHERE'S SALEM?" 

She heard movement around her but all her attention was focused on the pale stranger. His hand had pulled back when she screamed, his body almost collapsing onto the floor, as if the strain of reaching out for her had been too much. His face showed dismayed surprise, with the pleading still deep in the green eyes. Darcy felt Thor crouched by her side, but he seemed to be as shocked as she was; after his rush to her side he was now completely motionless. The roaring in her ears was like the hum of white noise and her throat ached. 

The man struggled to lift his body again. Darcy stumbled back, onto her feet and back into someone. The smell of leather came and _Clint_ said a small coherent part of her brain. She felt Clint’s hand strong and sane on her arm, his breath warm on her ear as he looked over her shoulder. The man at her feet looked at Clint as if he knew him, and a crazy idea popped into her mind before she ruthlessly suppressed it. 

"Please," she said, as the stranger's eyes turned back to hers, green eyes full of appeal. "Please, where is the cat? He's hurt, I need to find him." 

The stranger opened his mouth as if to speak. His mouth worked then he choked violently before he could get any words out. A brief effort to swallow and he struggled forward awkwardly, one long hand stretched out. Darcy flinched back again, into the reassuring leathered warmth of Clint. 

Clint spoke over her shoulder. “Steady now. Steady.” His hand moved gently against her arm and she felt herself calm a little. The frantic look smoothed out of the strangers face as his eyes flicked back and forth, to Clint then back to Darcy. His brow twisted and he tried to speak again, desperation mounting on his face as again he choked, and Darcy felt deeply sorry for him for an instant. Then Thor stirred and spoke and shattered her all over again. 

“Brother,” he said, and the green gaze switched to him. “Thor,” said Clint behind her, voice firm and warning, but Thor was entirely focused on the stranger. In a single motion Thor had turned to take up blankets and Clint had moved to intercept, saying Thor’s name again, asking him to wait. Darcy was left standing alone, eyes fixed on the man who once again was staring at her, mute appeal still in his eyes. 

Their eyes remained locked as Thor came and wrapped the blanket around him, and tried to help him stand. In the background she could hear Clint talking, an official tone in his voice, words drifting away from her as the roaring increased in her head. Thor's face was grim as he swung the stranger into his arms, limbs hanging weakly down. He turned to Darcy and the grimness gave way to sorrow. "Forgive me, Darcy, my sister. Tell Jane I love her but I must go." 

Clint joined Darcy again as Thor walked away through the plastic sheeting. Before it swung down the stranger, with one last desperate effort, turned his head, and moved his lips. Then Thor and his burden was gone. 

Darcy felt Clint’s arms close around her as she started to shake. “Shhhhh, Darcy,” he murmured in her ear. “Let's go to the common room. I’ll make you some tea. It’s okay, Darcy.” He swung a blanket around her and walked her out of the room. She was silent as he led her to the lobby, and as the elevator rose through the building. In the common room, he sat her down and put on water to boil, then sat beside her. 

Darcy looked up, as if seeing him for the first time. "Salem. I have to find Salem." She started to stand up, but Clint's hands were gentle on her shoulders, encouraging her to sit. 

"Salem is okay, Darcy." 

Darcy shook her head, vigorously, repeatedly. “No, he isn't okay. Where is he, Clint? Where is he?” 

Clint closed his eyes for a moment, then opened them and looked directly into her face. His words were gentle but firm. “The world is messed up, Darcy. Everything is different. You know what happened to Salem. Don’t you?” She returned his look, then stopped lying to herself and nodded, once. She let him wrap her in a blanket and give her tea. Then he got a mug for himself and joined her on the couch. Clint's comm buzzed once or twice. He listened to it, but other than that they sat in silence, Clint's arm around Darcy's shoulders. 

"Are they gone?" asked Darcy finally, after Clint had listened to and acknowledged a message. 

"Yes," said Clint. 

"Where?" 

Clint studied her for a moment, assessing if she could take the news. "Thor flew straight out a window. SHIELD tried to stop him but he took evasive action. Based on readings, he flew upstate and the Bifrost took him and his companion to Asgard." 

"Who was that...?" 

Clint looked steadily at her. "That was Loki. Thor’s brother, Loki.” He put a hand out to steady her cup as it shook. 

Her face was stunned, the shock widening her eyes and turning them into dark pools. “Clint,” was all she could whisper and he took the cup from her, replaced it with his hands and dredged up a smile from somewhere that said _hey, we’re okay_. 

“Are…you sure?” she whispered gently, as if it was too much to say out loud. 

“Completely,” Clint said, and he could not stop an undercurrent of grimness coming into his voice. 

“He said…before he left...what…” Darcy could not push the words past the lump in her throat. 

Clint squeezed her hands. “It’s okay, Darcy. He said, _you saved me_. That’s what he said.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from a poem that seems to have vanished off the internet. Oh well. 
> 
> Epilogue and part two of this mammoth fic to come. 
> 
> Tumblr - why didn't I reblog all this earlier? [I need something to hug](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119939163942/taylor-swift-is-thy-queen-crystal-the-dork), [begging cat](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119939396012/cat-begging-for-food), [random kittens](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119939361827), [suddenly, a man appears](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119939542097/selchieproductions-dear-followers-you-need), [Craig Ferguson with Kat Dennings, Queen of Cats](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119939245782/craigyfergss-new-blog-used-to-be-craigy-fergs) and [Loki wondering why everything thinks he likes cats](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/119939672922/wrecked-anon-the-challenge-loki-holding-a-lot).


	25. Cats come and go...

Coulson was in the Vault when he heard. 

When he had debriefed Clint after the incursion, both were aware his testimony had certain...implications. If Hamilton had been controlled, it hinted at a danger far worse than a single agent gone rogue. Coulson had brought it straight to Fury, who in turn sent Coulson to check covertly if the Sceptre was still in SHIELD hands. On the flight Coulson had checked the Sceptre's history: a few months at STATION being investigated, then transfer to the Vault. Coulson had his suspicions when he saw that the R&D techs who had investigated it were both dead, one on active duty, one in a car crash. 

His suspicions turned out to be completely justified. 

The proximity sensor he had dropped on the way in pinged so Coulson closed the lid of the empty box. He was on the other side of the storage facility when an agent approached and told him he was to report in. Fifteen minutes later he was flying back to New York with another pickle on his plate, and Clint, as usual, right in the middle of it. 

* * *

Natasha and Jane both arrived within half an hour of each other. 

The doctor checked Darcy out, then Jane collected her, Darcy clinging to her arm as if she would never let go. 

Clint went up to his apartment. Natasha was there waiting for him and now sat, legs and arms wrapped around him, under the rug that lived on the couch. Clint's earpiece was out and they sat in silence, communicating only in the mysterious way two people who knew each other perfectly can. 

"Confirmation bias?" Clint said eventually. 

"I'll stretch to supposition," said Natasha dryly, but she pulled him closer. 

Coulson chose that moment to come in. He dragged a chair forward and faced the couch, feet entangled with Clint's. It was standard operating procedure to debrief as soon as possible after an incident. The setting and posture of the participants were not standard operating procedure, but Strike Team Delta got the job done, and didn’t worry too much about how. 

Besides, Coulson was happier about not having this conversation on SHIELD property. It was fortunate that Clint had insisted on keeping JARVIS out of his room, and Natasha had already swept it and it was clean. As for the recording he was about to make, Coulson had a hunch it would be heard only by Fury. The shape things were taking...it was better to be cautious. 

Natasha moved back a little so Clint could see her clearly. “So, how are you?” She knew the answer to the question, but the small recording device in Coulson’s pocket needed the words from Agent Barton. 

Clint sighed and leaned his head against hers. “Surprisingly okay. I didn’t want to kill him, which was a surprise.” 

"A relief?" suggested Natasha, eyebrow raised. 

"Not that," and Clint lifted his head and considered. "But Pegasus? All that? That feels over." 

"For the record, can you state who you did not want to kill?" Coulson asked. 

"I am referring to Loki, one-time prince of Asgard," said Clint formally but fluently. Coulson saw the slight relaxation in the muscles around Natasha’s eyes. 

"Please briefly state how you encountered Loki," Coulson said. 

"He appeared at the same time the cat belonging to Prince Thor vanished." Clint gave a long blink. "Anything else I can say would be supposition." Natasha pursed her lips. Coulson sat back and hid his smile. 

"How were you alerted to his appearance?" asked Coulson when the smile was safely tucked away. 

"I was in the surveillance room when I heard Darcy Lewis scream. When I entered the room she was sitting a few feet from the door with her back to me. Loki was collapsed on the floor, facing Darcy. Thor was immobile beside Darcy. It looked like he had just moved there." 

"What was your reaction?" 

Clint gave Coulson a long hard look. "I was pretty dumbfounded. I'm not made of stone. I recognised him and put two and two together and got _insane_." He looked sideways at Natasha. "When did the insane answer start always being the right one?" He turned back to Coulson as Natasha shrugged. "I assessed the situation, with the intention of keeping everyone calm and keeping Loki on-site." He grimaced. "Thor had other ideas. That's when I called it in." 

"He went through our agents like they were nothing," Coulson said. "You made the right call." 

"Were you suspicious of the cat at any time?" asked Natasha. 

"I can't say I was. He was smart, sure, but he was alien." Clint squinted down at her. “You should have told me, Tasha.” 

“There was nothing to tell,” Coulson said. “Merely possibilities.” 

“How possible?” 

“Right up to the transformation, a 40 % chance at most,” Natasha said, head thrown back to meet Clint's eyes. 

"Is that a problem?" asked Coulson, his voice cool and unemotional. 

Clint grinned for the first time. "After Bangkok? No." 

"Agent Barton is referring to an operation in which he failed to inform his handler he had approximately a 70% chance of being terminated, a fate he evaded by jumping off a 30 floor skyscraper." Coulson's voice didn't waver, but he did raise his eyebrows sarcastically when he reached the end of his note. He coughed and moved on. 

"As you know, due to the attack we had no surveillance in the room so we'll have to go through the events in detail," Coulson continued. "But first, I'd like to know Loki's demeanour.” 

"He was in bad condition," and Clint half-frowned. "Weak. Broken. Limited motor control. Inability to speak. His senses appeared to be normal as far as I can judge." He was silent for a moment and looked across at Natasha. 

"Remember that guy in Colombia, imprisoned by the cartel? The one who’d been half starved in that box for five years who couldn't walk? That was what Loki was like.” 

“Being a cat has its costs then,” Natasha said softly. 

“ Was he hostile?" Coulson asked. 

Clint paused. "No. In no way hostile." 

"Could you elaborate?" Coulson asked. 

"It's difficult to put my finger on," said Clint slowly but his fingers danced with a different message. _Difficult. Involves Darcy._

"You can be candid," said Coulson. "There will be no...fallout." 

"Loki was not hostile. But he wasn't particularly focused on me," Clint said. "He was focused on Darcy Lewis." Coulson and Natasha's eyes met. 

"I take it, in a positive rather than a negative way?" suggested Coulson. 

"You could say that," said Clint. "But there's more. He couldn't speak, but he knows I read lips. When he failed to communicate vocally he mouthed a message at Darcy." 

"For you to translate. Did you?" Natasha asked. 

"Yes, partially. I told Darcy he said 'You saved me'. She's still in shock so I didn't tell her it all." He paused. "Loki said, 'You saved me. I will return.'" 

"So this isn't over," said Coulson, leaning back in his chair. 

"No," said Clint with conviction. "This isn't over."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cats come and go without ever leaving. ~Martha Curtis
> 
> Loki will return in the (spoilerifically titled) sequel: [_Salem, Avenger_](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4014499/chapters/9020758).
> 
> Tumblr: [This part is finished](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/120095229522/openinkstand-inky-paw-prints-presumably-left-by), but [so much left to write](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/120095323312). For now [let's celebrate with cake](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/120095285492/catsbeaversandducks-the-japanese-take-cute-to-a), your [waiter is ready to take your order](http://canterburyfic.tumblr.com/post/120095365577/iamthebadwolf85-thiscorpsofbrothers)! 
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading, commenting and kudosing - so thrilled with the reaction this fic has got! Your cat stories have been an inspiration!


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